Have you ever rejected someone who you later on fell in love with?

[Anonymous]

Have you ever rejected someone you later fell in love with later in life?

[SuperManiac]

Never in my case although I've been on the receiving end of that with my wife. She rejected me a couple of times and friend-zoned me before she finally agreed to date with me.

That said, I usually don't persist this way after a rejection (I don't want to risk being a nuisance to the woman), but with my wife, she was giving me mixed signals the whole time. She was flirting with me so heavily and even kissed me once while we were dancing, and that's the third time I asked her out in response to her kiss when she finally agreed.

In her case though, the reason she was reluctant to date me even though she was so flirty towards me is that she got it in her head that I was some sort of playboy type not interested in serious relationships.

I ended up finally changing her mind. Took a lot of persistence though and I had to jam an emergency stop button on an elevator on our first date and kiss her because the date was lukewarm up until that point. Apparently I won her over with that move according to her.

[Asker]

Glad it worked out for you in the end.

[SoWhAt249]

Yes but unknowingly and without meaning I would say, because we were very young. She told me after we started dating. Basically, we grew up together, and I always loved her, but not always in a romantic sense. She was definitely more than a friend for me. She'd come to my home, and come up to my room, and as you would act with a friend, or someone you're confortable with, she'd jump on my bed next to me, or like tickle me, call me to go to places, but I'd tell her to stop, or refuse to go with her and bunch of other things. But we started actually dating several years back, and one evening she said to me and I quote "Why did you reject me before" and I was like what, I have no idea what you're talking about, and she told me that all that time she was flirting with me, and I just refused everything she threw at me, and I was like mindblown. I liked her, but I had no idea she liked me like that.
This isn't the usual "Do you want to go on a date? No." format you might be looking for, but I think it counts.

[Diiamondz825]

Yes!!! It’s happing to me as of now at this moment in my life.
I’ve been friends with this guy for about four years, He has told me often throughout these years that he has a crush on me and wants to take me out. Always rejected him on the going out but we did hang out as friends a lot. However recently we’ve spent the past three weeks every day with each other and I realize I’m falling in love with him.
I’m falling in love with his heart and the type of person he is never really got to see it until I spent those 3 weeks with him

[Anonymous]

Sort of, yeah. A guy wanted to date me, but I asked that we stay friends and take things slow, get to know each other. He agreed.

But overtime I started to fall for him. But he wanted to stay friends, saying dating me would mess up our friendship 😩

Love sucks.

[GD360]

Yea. We went to college together, she was just a friend. She showed interest in me wanting to go out, but I wasn't ready to date at the time. She left college then came back, I missed her and wanted to tell her but I hesitated, graduated year later never saw her again. Found out later she got married and ghosted me on Facebook

[Asker]

What do you mean you wasn't ready to date?

[GD360]

College can be stressful I was depressed a lot

[Asker]

I understand that well.

[ForeverSingle28]

Yes the guy been trying to get with me for almost a year, finally gave him a chance but I didn’t want to because I had a bad feeling bout him, 8 months into us talking every day I was falling in love, i lost my virginity to him, 2 months later after that I found out the real him, all he wanted was sex he was in multiple committed relationships, I blinded by love, we stopped talking I feel into depression lost weight, & went into another toxic relationship.

[Gary888818]

can't say I have. I always dropped all contact and move on. I've had some try to hit me up later on down the line but I just ignore and dont respond. They had their chance. I would be constantly worried about her motives if I gave it a chance so it's a no go for me.

[Gary888818]

And yeah I dont change my mind after rejecting someone. They deserve someone that gets it right the first time

[princessde]

First lover I lost my virginity to - yes and then fell in love. It was love at 2nd sight. I was 20 haha. But he dumped me in 3 months. He said he found someone better after 1 year of he ghosting me. How it feels? When you reject someone and later fall in love with - it could be that the person who rejected is selfish to later fall in love. Very unusual.

[shimmeryns]

Never. I don't think I could fall in love with someone I have rejected 🤔

[Anonymous]

Nope, when I say no it's because I meant it. A concept women should try.

[Asker]

I do agree.

[Melshmallow046]

Not personally, but my friend's wife said no the first two times he asked her out.

[Jackieboi]

In (high) school yes. But not afterwards. Dunno if i would call it fell in love considering the definition has been broadened a lot since then, but at least strongly liked or infatuated with.

[Anonymous]

I have rejected someone but never ended up with them I rejected them because I was in a relationship at the time and I just didn't feel the same way he is now married while I am single

[Rica_ChicaUSA]

Nope, thankfully

If I had, I wouldn’t blame him for moving on, and that would hurt.

[scooogy]

Yes, but she grew sociophobic, and I don't see her getting out of there.

[Neeceeb7]

Hmmm kinda. I was not a fan of my first husband but he wouldn't give up

[Anonymous]

No, I'm a dude.
We generally make our choices and stick to them.
We don't play the silly games and change our minds a million times based on what our friends or other factors tell us.

[Asker]

Why is this anon?

[Opinion Owner]

I anon ALL my posts.

[Asker]

Now I'm even more curious to know your identity.

[Asker]

Why do you always go anon?

[Opinion Owner]

This site is filled with idiots who make it their life goal to attack when they disagree.

[Asker]

Be an adult and deal with it perhaps? 😛

[Opinion Owner]

Or just let the children get triggered and use shaming tactics to try and somehow "offend" me while I laugh at their retardedness.

[Asker]

Don't flatter yourself. You're not that important to triger anyone. 😊

[Opinion Owner]

Keep trying. Yo only prove my point.

[Browneye57]

The woman's realm. It's ALWAYS about the FEELZ.

[Asker]

Yes.

[Browneye57]

And they are subject to change at any given moment. It is their god-given right to do so, just ask them!
A woman's brain runs on feelings and emotion.
A guy's brain runs on thought and logic.
And ne'er the twain shall meet. ;)

This isn't to say either doesn't have some of the other's, but it's a very basic difference between the two genders.

[Asker]

I was actually asking becase of a guy who seems to have changed his mind.

[Browneye57]

There's always a chance of misinterpretation or impression. But if you've established a relationship with a guy and it broke off, it's highly unlikely for them to come back and revisit that. The bottom line is you simply cannot negotiate attraction or desire.
And guys in particular, make a quick assessment of any woman they meet - it's either a 'hell yes' or a 'hell no' moment, and that generally does not change. Remember, guys are driven by their testosterone - he's either wants you or he doesn't. They're not generally wishy-washy, unless they just are, or are really weak. Or have run out of options, and you don't want those anyway.

[Asker]

No, initially he wasn't up for a relationship so we remained friends, after 2 years he now suddenly wants a relationship.

[Browneye57]

I would re-word that..."Now suddenly he wants sex."
And why there's really no such thing as a platonic opposite-sex 'friend' - one or the other will nearly always want more. There's a reason they were attracted to each other in the first place. But women will tend to nurture a 'friendship' from their emotional state, whereas men are much more goal-driven in their endeavors. As I say, a woman that isn't sexual with a man is not really that much use to him. I mean really, as far as friendships go, men are WAY more interesting and fun. And why a guy will know plenty of women, but his best 'friends' are guys. They're the ones he does fun stuff with - like hardcore guy-stuff - racing, competitions, strenuous activities like hiking and climbing, paratrooping, or building stuff, creating, etc.

[Asker]

Was thinking the same thing. Easier to say no now. 👍

[Browneye57]

Well, it's not a REASON to say no, but at least you have clarity. If he's really a catch, worthy of your time and attention, then maybe he's a viable prospect for a real romantic relationship. YOU have to make that assessment.
I also know for a fact that women are either sexually attracted to a man or they aren't, and it's not changing any time soon. We call them 'vag-tingles', and once they're gone, or if they were never there, are NEVER coming back. It's a law of attraction, and you simply cannot negotiate attraction or desire - it's either there or it isn't, you can't manufacture it or create it out of thin air. If he doesn't bowl you over and make your knees week then he's simply not for you.

[Asker]

He turns my knees into jelly but I am afraid he'd be in it just for sex, which is not what I want.

[Browneye57]

Well, doesn't his staying close and in contact and keeping a 'relationship' with you over the previous two years have value to you? Is it possible all the while he did have feelings but chose not to reveal them?
I'm not saying he's the perfect option for you, but what exactly would be wrong if it DID turn out all he wanted was sex? That's all it would be. What if it was really the ideal relationship and person you've wanted all your life?
I will tell you the best lovers are your best friends first. DAMHIK. I married my best girl - but had to divorce first wife first. That cost me nearly a half-million. BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!!

[Asker]

It does have value but he's been pretty open previously about not being interested in me.
I rather date someone who doesn't just want sex from me.
Glad things worked out for you tho. 👌

[Browneye57]

Sure. Just don't date someone that DOESN'T want sex with you. You'll be bored out of your mind. ;)

[Asker]

Lets hope that doesn't happen. 😂

[BeHappy1985]

Impossible, you'd have to be bipolar or something of sort.

[theharlequin]

No. When I reject someone, it's final.

[WhiteShoulder]

This never happened to me

[Anonymous]

Yes... and I miss her.

[Asker]

What happened?

[Opinion Owner]

Our schedules conflicted so we went our separate ways. I still want to text her but even that's hard to do.

[genericname85]

luckily no xD that would suck.

[Agem123]

No. It doesn't make sense