He says he wants to take things slow?

[Anonymous]

I've been going out with one guy for like 7 times. The first 5 time we didn't have any sort of body contact was just getting food or hanging out, and he did say he wants to take things slow. Everytime we hung out its a bit rushed due to different schedules. We flirt a bit online but that's all. I do like him a lot and thought we will finally making progress as he asked me to come to his place in couple days to hang out.

One day before work, I was hanging out with a male friend, it was just friend and not a date or anything but he saw it and texted me about it. He didn't say much just said he saw me but won't bother me. I explained it to him it was just a friend but he only says if I wanna do "that sort of things" it's not his business because we don't know each other that well yet.

On the day we stick to the original plan to his place, we finally made out (he kissed me) and was about to do more. I stopped cause I thought he wanted to take things slow. After that, he's been a bit distant and not making as much effort as before. I thought it was because of what happened between us but later he told me something bad happened in his life and explained what happened, so it actually wasn't me at all.

Yesterday I went to his place while he told me what was going on with his life then we went to bed, I kissed him, we did everything, oral etc. But the last second he insisted that we should wait so it's more special. We're both over 25. I am very confused now. As he also isn't making as much effort to ask me out or talking to me. (reply slower, doesn't text first, doesn't say as much sweet things) I don't know if it was because of his personal affairs or he's not feeling it with me. It's been 7 times if I'm friend zone I kinda wanna know and move on before I catch more feelings.

[LeeIre]

It seems like he lost some trust in you even tho it was only a friend you were with its hard to prove that. He might have thought if I don't do something with you. He may lose you it could also be the personal stuff. I would say you can text them less for a while and then see if he stays distant if so its probably you but if you are thinking of doing that make sure he knows you're there for him first & clear up the friend he saw you with cause he might then think oh she is definitely with that other person now if you suddenly stop texting/meeting up

[Screenwriter]

He explained his reticence, but seems to be MORE reticent? Sounds like he's one step forward two steps back. There is no way to know except to ask him precisely. But if you're not on the same page, doesn't sound hopeful for the relationship. I don't know that you're in the friend zone. I think when this guy says slow he means SLOW. It seems too slow for you, however.

[Anonymous]

Honestly? Just ask him yourself. Explain all of this to him/why you think this way and just ask for clarification. There’s no point in dancing around it. Good luck.