I see some guy's complaining because women in general don't ask men out. And if the invitee is suppose to pay for the date asked for and planned that leaves them still being the ones paying for all the first dates. They scream IT'S NOT FAIR!!! The problem today is some people including some women think we should be completely equal despite the fact that we are too different to be completely equal. For one thing biologically we are made different which is gonna make us think differently and behave differently. Also until men can start carrying and delivering babies we will not be equal. I think you can deal with asking women out. You don't have to fork out a bunch of money. You can find cheap or free places to get to know her.
Now if you still think it's not fair then don't ask women out. Find a way to get them to notice you and hope for the best.
And before the guys that complain about these issues jump my a$$ because some women think we should be equal in every way too. Just know I don't agree with them either. I know there are some things men are better at and somethings women are better at generally speaking.
Ask women out and pay for the date you ask for and plan?
If it was possible deal with pregnancy and delivery and women ask men out and pay for the date they ask for and plan?
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Please select your age
Guy's, What would you rather do? Ask women out and pay for the date you plan or if possible be the ones that carry and deliver babies and us ask?
It if more the Sims maybe then. there lot crazy things. Yes make pregnancy is included. Joking a side. It all depends how many money person has or not.
The real issue that guys have with that is the idea that men should be the ones to make all of the effort in the beginning, and also that the majority (not "some") demand equal treatment everywhere else. Then those guys just wonder why they should have to act one way when it comes to dating, and another way everywhere else.
Like there may be women like you who don't believe in that stuff, but there are so many more who do. They claim to be "traditional women" when it comes to dating. But then what about in a relationship? Those same women will criticise guys who have traditional expectations of them. Even worse are the overly-entitled ones who for example stay home all day while the guy works his ass off, then expect him to do 50% of the housework. They're only truly interested in holding the man to their traditional role while being free to do whatever they want themselves. It's this arrogant one-sided behaviour that men have a problem with. So I'm not saying that you're a liar, but all of this stuff is usually bullshit.
For me, I had no problem paying for the first date for example when my girlfriend came to see me. She offered to pay her half and I insisted on paying. Why? Because she'd travelled to me, and I knew that she wasn't the kind of girl to expect the guy to put in all of the effort without her meeting halfway.
I wouldn't do that with certain other women. One girl for example complained a lot about "cheap men" on the first date, after I'd bought the first round of drinks. Another girl told me that she believed that men should pay for everything. From the rest of our conversation I could tell they were the kinds of girls I described above.
The thing is also, the guys who complain about that the most are guys with few options who feel like they have to jump through hoops and put up with whatever demands a woman puts on them. A guy who has options just won't care too much about it.
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If you understood the different biology of men and women you'd understand why men are more aggressive in going after women. It's natural for males to pursue females in many animal kingdoms.
I understand the different biology of men and women. Nowhere will you see me complain that women don't approach and ask out men more, that's a silly argument to me because that's just our nature and it's never going to change anyway.
While that probably does happen with the right kinds of women, but the reason men get so frustrated with this stuff is because often it just doesn't and we find this out first-hand. It then seems like a lot of the time women don't really give a shit about what men want, and just prefer them to believe that that's the case. It's probably the same for women too in some ways, but a guy can do everything he's "supposed" to do and still get fucked over. I know that whenever I went the traditional route it almost never worked out well for me, and I didn't really find success until I ignored that stuff and kind of broke the rules. Also the way a woman speaks about this stuff says a lot about her attitude towards relationships anyway.
I think the way a guy speaks about paying for a date he asked for and plans says a lot about him too. The man I'm with now asked me out. He took me out to eat and showed me the city since I just moved there. We spent hours talking and having the best connection ever. I just moved and really couldn't afford anything that wasn't necessary. But luckily he just wanted to treat me.
And I found out he actually didn't have a job and paid on a credit card which is what he was temporarily living off of until he found another job. I didn't care that he was unemployed and he made me feel so special. I ended up renting a room from him which helped him out and me since the place I was staying was temporary. We fell in love and I ended up paying for the first part of our relationship. Once he got a job he helped more having a bigger salary than me. I took a chance. I could have helped supported him and once he got a job he could have said see ya. But I got to know his heart and he was worth taking that chance for. We are going on 5 years now.
What we did right was we got to know each other over the phone before going on a date. We already knew we really liked each other. And that's what guys need to do. And if it hadn't worked out in the end I wouldn't have regretted the wonderful time we did have with each other. But luckily it did work out. He gives more at certain times and I give more at certain times.
I want to know that I'm gonna be with someone that's not afraid to give and will support me if I fall. Just like I support him when he falls. Because at some point in life we always fall on hard times.
With that said men don't have to fork out money. There are plenty of free things to do in the beginning.
I will gladly open ketchup for a woman, move out her furniture, give her a piggy back ride or a bridal lift, because those are favors and gestures I that I can actually make which she can't.
But we are completely equal in our ability to earn money, and if a woman who is just as capable of treating me to a dinner as I am refuses to do so and feels entitled to the opposite, well that's just expecting special treatment and treating relationships like a one way street.
Why should I care about an arrangement where I'm getting the short end of the stick?
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I agree that it shouldn't be a 2 way street. I plan and take him on 2nd date and pay for it because I don't feel I can expect him to pay for something i plan. What if i took him to an expensive restaurant that he can't afford on his salary? I'm not gonna embarrass him that way by asking for half. Nor should a man do that to a woman when he ask her out. You shouldn't assume she has the money you have. And sure she could just tell you no she can't go out with you. But I'm not gonna tell a guy the reason because it's embarrassing and he is left to think she just not interested.
You should never bring up money during a date. And you could lose a good woman that would have made it worth it to you in other ways. And I don't mean sex. Lol!
I mean.. I can give birth if I had been born a female and been fertile, but it doesn't mean I would ever have to give birth. 🤷 Just saying. If human men were like seahorses, then we would be birthing the children. Odd little urchins. I also don't bother to ask women out, though I can't lie... This question made me laugh. There are PLENTY of individuals that will continue doing both sides of this...
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No. You wouldn't have to give birth but if all women chose not too the humans would go extinct. I feel it's my duty as a woman doing my part. But glad you got a laugh.😎
I don't see the correlation between pregnancy and an imposed rule of Men propositioning women for dates. They aren't even similar. Using such things to try and illustrate equality or a lack thereof is also very silly.
We live in an age of equality now. This means women have an equal opportunity to ask Men out on dates. The asker pays, or you go dutch.
The ability to carry a child inside of you does not gibe you an entitlement for Men to ask you out on dates. That is golden uterus syndrome. You aren't a godess who walks the earth just because you can do something that 50% of the population can do.
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They are both things are genders have to deal with. Each gender has things the other doesn't have to deal with. Sorry it was hard for you to put that together.
And as much as feminazis and men like you would like to think we all could be completely equal despite the differences in our genders, you're lying to yourselves.
Do you think all women can do what all men can do and Visa versa? Because until we can we will never be fully equal. But you'll do well finding yourself a feminazi since you have the same beliefs. Don't be surprised when you hate it because she doesn't need you and will be done with you the minute you fall on hard times.
Men and Women are different. Yes, even to the most casual of observers this is the bleeding obvious. You have confused Equalitu for Equality of outcome, which will never be achieved and actively works against equal opportunity, rights and responsibilities.
The fact that all children are birthed by women has NOTHING to do with which gender should pursue the other in the dating scene. That would be like saying Men should pay for dates because Women pay more for hair cuts. The two aren't related, ehich is what characterises your argument as uncomfortably and stunningly stupid. To even try and comprehend how you arrived at such a comparison would be an excursion into the realm of fantasy, or a desperate atrempt to understand the colour nine.
"Men like me", are against feminism, cultural marxism and postmodernism. Women are NOT SPECIAL NEEDS people. They have the same opportunities, rights and responsibilities as Men do, outside of biological functions.
No, you do not deserve a free ride just because you carry out the biological functions of a Mother. Pull your head in.
Men and women are both equal and different in many ways. There is nothing wrong with her pitching in to cover the costs if you two are dining together as long as he pays her back. As for men having babies, hell no! Let women carry and deliver babies; and men compassionately support them through through the process.
I don't care if your age says 43. Listen here, child.
What in the world does paying for dates and asking a person out have to do with bearing children? Asking someone out is a matter of choice. One either chooses to do it or they don't. The ability to bear children has nothing to do with choice. Women can and men can't. Just like women can only give an X chromosome but men can give an X or Y or how without men, there is no baby to begin with. It's a natural balance.
If a woman doesn't ask a man out. She makes that choice. Has nothing to do with her being a woman. If a man complains, it's often because women complain about men not asking them out when they are fully capable of speaking for themselves.
so the notion that men should have no problem bearing children if women are to ask men out and pay for dates is ridiculous.
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Since it wasn't clear enough for you the point is if women have to go through all the pain of child birth and don't complain men can get over the fact that biologically it's natural for males to pursue females. We all have things the other gender doesn't have to deal with. And I'm not saying all men because most seem to understand why things work the way they do with exceptions. At least the ones I've had the pleasure of meeting in the real world in my 43 years on this earth young and old. You as a man have a choice to not ask women out. So stop complaining. Wait for one to ask you and won't be put out for paying for your cup of coffee or drink like certain men get. But thanks for the compliment as I am childlike at heart. It help keep me young and continue to have fun in life.
My son is almost 16yrs old and just now getting into wanting to date. I've never taught him that he most likely would have to ask a girl out or that he should pay for whatever he plans for her. I asked him the other day if he would have her pay half and he looked at me funny saying no. If I ask her I want to treat her. He says he would look like an inconsiderate jerk to ask her for half. I couldn't have been so proud that he naturally understands how to treat a girl and in the end he will find a girl that will take care of him and treat him special.
You may come across a girl who wants to pay for herself and you'll be so pleased. That is until you realize she will be one of those feminist who doesn't need a man that most guys complain about.
Now, if you don't like what I have to say, you are excused.😎
Yeah, I'd go for having kids myself but, I'd have to be a girl, first.
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Hey if men were the ones giving birth I wouldn't complain about pursuing them, taking them out, and paying for a date to show they are special in this world. As it is when he pays I will pay for the next date because I want to treat them and show them the connection we have and they are special too me.
You know that's an exaggeration. No woman wants an abusive man. Abusive guys can be so good at hiding who they really are until she's fallen in love then slowly starts the abuse. And man women stay because they love him and believe he won't do it again. He also starts isolating her from friends and family making her believe she's got no one to help her.
You assume everyone wants to irresponsibly contribute to the problem of overpopulation.
I'm not asking my woman to deliver baby.. I'm just asking her to pay for her own food.
I went out with my best friend today and we each paid for our own meal and had a nice chat over drinks and tasty food. The only way a girlfriend would be different from him is sexually, so if I have to pay a woman because she sleeps with me, then she is a prostitute.
I'd rather and am going to do what I always do ; You pay your own way as I pay my own way. Its just a time for aquaintce , not carrying someone financial for an answer to relations at anothers expense. A rejection because of this impliments that the other has a motive beyond the moment. Basically , the only time this works properly is when all is good to the true.
Furthermore , men aren't responsible for a womans pain in child birth. That's a curse from GOD when Eve messed up in the garden of Eden. We men have our own curses to deal with for following the dummy who ate of the fruit.. By design and intention from all of our creator , men do the leading and selecting wether you believe it or not or like it or not. Stop teaching these young guys to be deceived into a womans deception of valor.
That's the point. We have our curses and you have yours. And no one said you have to carry a woman. You don't even have to ask a woman out. But if you do don't be rude by bringing up money on a date. You invited her. She didn't ask you. If she did I'd say she should pay. I don't mind treating someone when I take them out. I don't get the bill and tell him you have to pay half of this and that. That's so tacky and not romantic at all. And if can't afford it take her to the damn beach. Won't cost you a thing. And you won't turn women off.
I dont even date. I go straight into relationship. Happily married and never been single in my entire adult life. So you telling me about women and what they dont and do like is a waist of both our time. And after ten children from my first wife who passed , got some experience in that department also.. Every woman is different and so are her preferences as well as her own desires. Speak only for yourself.
You're not the boss of me. But it fills my heart to know you're happily married and not wasting single womens time with your calculator.
Hopefully the wifey doesn't fall on hard times so you don't have to carry her. My man and I are there for each other if the other falls. And the fact that he took me out on a date and didn't expect to divide up the check told me he's not afraid to give without expecting something in return as I would. I think most women look for that in a man.
You automatically think a womans motives is to use a man and no doubt some gold diggers do. But they are a minority. And it doesn't suddenly mean you treat all women like they are no one special. Because young men today don't understand that I guarantee it is why men can't find a decent woman or get a second date. That and not taking the time to know the woman he's asking out. They thing a womans hot and ask of out before even talking to her to see if she would be a good fit in more ways than physical.
Anyway you don't have to agree but don't tell me I can't Express my opinion on the subject. This is my question don't forget and you could have scrolled on if you didn't like it or think it's stupid.
First of all , I've been financially retired since 18 Finance isn't a issue. Secondly you've calculated me completely wrong. Thirdly , my mention only was directed to dating. Fourth and counting... young men today have a f... up selective pool to select from. Let's not lie about that. Saying all of them dont understand is an understatement as well.
Hardly similar you can become parents when you want. A guy can't decide they want to become a father and just be it. Still limited to get a woman to carrying it for him. So why should we pay a person that has more privileges than we? Isn't it unfair as it is?
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Why should we go through all the pain of pregnancy and child birth to give you a child? Life isn't always fair. Suck it up.
Yeah but your giving yourself a child too and you can do it on your own if you want. You have a option men don't. It doesn't give you right to anything else. I think the one asking for a date should be prepared to pay independent of gender. If you want to be limited to others picking you, you can sit and wait and lose the chance to date guys that peaks your interest, but you don't peak theirs because you don't do anything just sit there and expect them to do all the work.
That's the thing. I don't expect them to do all the work. I pay for dates with my man. I also give him so much more. But the men that sit there and get offended because they don't think it's fair to pay for her coffee or drink when he asked is bs. A woman will eventually make it up to you when you treat her special. In the end it evens out if you got to know her some before taking her on a date so that you know you two have a connection.
If you take women on dates based solely on a physical attraction instead of getting to know what she's about first, you are taking a good chance of putting out money and not getting a second date. So don't do that. Slow down.
And if you do end up with a woman who wants to pay her way don't be surprised when she turns out to be a "I don't need a man feminist" that men complain about too. You can't have it both ways. So know her and treat her special. In the end you'll end up with a woman that treats you special.
Eventually is not good enough why build a dept that may never be paid. It the same reason you don't lend stuff to strangers your bound to lose it. It's better to not build a dept to anyone at all before you can trust them. Guys that don't want to pay doesn't do it because they are offended it's more of a principle, what they feel is right. Sure that means they ditch all who wants free dinner. But it's a choice and a opinion. Not a way of getting offended more a way of rejecting women who are in for the benefits not for the guy.
I've never had any issue paying for dates. I've never even thought to have an issue with it. This forum is the only place I've ever seen people making a big deal over this. People here must be broke as fuck.
This is a pretty stupid question. Having babies and who pays for a date aren't connected. Like, at all.
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Well if you didn't just read the question and read the description explaining the connection you might get it. I'm glad most understood what this says.
Wait! Are you a feminazi? Because you're reaction would make more sense.
No, I hate feminist. You're question is just really dumb. Guys have to ask us out because we have babies? Why. What if I hate the date and never see him again. How will I have his babies then? How was it not a waste of his money? I always pay for myself. I don't want guys thinking I owe them sex because they bought me drinks.
imma just say it the way it is , seems like a feminist question to me?
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Please explain because I'm so not a feminist. But you probably didn't take the time to read the description that explains what this is about. But do elaborate.
because the whole carrying babies made it look like it , read the whole thing and meh really , the whole carrying babies thing just makes it weird , like just cuz we could carry babies at that point means that a girl can pay? like what does something your biologicaly programmed to do have anything to do with whether you pay or not
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