I’ve been told my whole life if a guy takes you out and is mean to you “it means he likes you”.. stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. There is nothing wrong with teasing the other person. But being directly rude or mean to someone obviously means he doesn’t like you that much.. another thing.. when you like a guy you should play hard to get and pretend you don’t like him.. from my experience it tends to confuse the men and send them in the other direction.
Too numerous to mentions. In my opinion, *most* dating advice is bad advice.
One thing I don't like is when someone says, "You two would be a perfect couple"... Unless they have a good reason to say that, it is usually a bad sign... LOL
I was told to date successful women such as lawyers and doctors and such and I did and it was terrible. Everyone i know keeps telling me that but i dont respect girls like that and have no interest in them. Id prefer some young church girl any day. Now dating is much much better.
@pleasestopthis in and of itself it isn't. The problem is what you give up to have one. One thing men like is youth. An 18 year old lawyer is impressive but essentially impossible. Between an 18 year old gas station attendant and a 30 year old attorney, most men looking for marriage will choose the 18 year old.
Here is another example. A girl just gets out of school to be a doctor at 28. She is now not suitable for most men to consider having kids with. She MUST work because her student loans are due, so staying home with a baby is not an option unless the man can not only pay for him her and the baby but add in her degree. Or the child is destined for daycare. Personally as a man i dont like that option and would never purposely put myself in a situation to have kids in daycare. So now she's working 5 years before kids but damn she's already 28 so she will be 33 before having kids, now i have to start worrying about medical issues and time tables etc. A 20 year old waitress wouldn't have this problem.
There are more examples but essentially i see no benefit of women having education and careers to marriage and family oriented men.
Men like, youth, sweet personality, innocence, morals, caring motherly qualities, beauty, femininity just to name the most universally important ones. These qualities are how you attract family oriented men. How much money you make or how much education you have is not going to be even on the top 100 list of what men look for... yet you will sacrifice some of the things on this list to get a decent career.
Its basically shooting yourself in the foot in order to buy new nikes to run a race. Sure the best sneaks help but not when you have a hole in your foot. Lol
@pleasestopthis A woman with a career is a turnoff to men who want a housewife. Women with careers are less likely to quit work to stay at home and raise their children
Yeah you got it. But men who want housewives typically are more successful and family oriented. Which seems pretty high demand from women these days. If you want some other kind of relationship dynamics like unmaried dual income no kids sort of thing and focus on materialistic pursuits then this doesn't apply. Then a man will want you to pull in just as much money as him.
I would not say 'worst'. But most useless are statements like: "Just wait" "It depends" "Don't worry" "I am atheist" "Who cares" ... I must admit that I have my own share in contributing (seemingly) unrelated 'advice' - often there is a line between one other line... "Worst" ... could be a suggestion that (accidentally?) leads to a disaster if taken for serious?
Comments: 1) How long should she wait? Until she is dead? 2) Depends on what? 3) Are you a careless guy? 4) Oh, okay. So you hate church? 5) Yeah, right. Also why should she care about you?
@andreasderjuengere Oh, guten Abend. ;-) I just commented on your quotes as I think about them: Don't let her wait to long, else she is gone (like chatting only once per week with her, to less!). Show her what matters to you (strong likes/dislikes, or where it is just okay). if she has worries, listen to her very close, she might have a reason to worry. Atheists are to foreigners considered as religion-haters, yes that is a stereotype again. I'm just open-minded to let her pray at my apartment, let her go to church and such but also wanted to be treated like that back. If she cares for something, that is good, don't play it down.
@roland77 Moin Moin :D... I placed these as 'typical' examples. "Worst advice" often is given with ABSENSE of advice, or even entirely unrelated to the issue.
Never ask the guy first/initiate anything. You can subtly hint, but that's it. Guys like to be in control. Totally terrible advice 😂 luckily, I didn't follow it, and had a great time in my first relationship where I asked him to make it official, I asked him o dance at prom, and I initiated our first kiss. Better advice: Never sit idle just because someone else wants to feel powerful. Ask for what you want
I told my guy friend that the person I was chatting was asking for nude pictures. He told me that I should try sending one because I might bag myself a boyfriend. He's a shitty friend, I know.
The asker didn't mention anything able men in the question (only question not description) Still all are taking about advises for men. That's a big irony. Girls don't need advice right. Guys compete to get a girl and girls advice other men to make them perfect for themselves. I'm not blaming anyone but we have to change this. Is you think men and women are equal then it should be followed here too. Listen guys don't think that you need to fulfill someone's requirements. If someone has their requirements then it's not love - it's a fuckin deal. You're not doing love buisness.
I will probably get hates for this, but I strongly dislike it when I ask for advice about my crush, and most people answer with "Tell him how you feel!!". This is kinda annoying. I always lived by the thought that taking small steps forward is better than immediately doing all the bigger things.
@Jamie05rhs Yes. Letting him know is a huge thing, because it basically decides what's happening next. It is better if you get to know each other first.
@Iwillfindyou21 I'm trying to think back on the time when I was a teenager. That was quite a while ago. However, I can't remember any instance whatsoever where I hated a girl because she expressed feelings for me. Only the one time when a girl drew a picture of a dick and gave it to me; I was grossed out by that. I guess if she showed a little more class I probably would have been okay with it. But you also have to realize I was only 14 at the time.
Be yourself is the worst and the best advice someone can give you about dating. The worst: I didn't have any social skill and I thought that if some girl didn't like me, it was her fault, no improve no changes... The best: discover who you really are before going to the field ND after use this advice, it has presented me a lot of girls
To change your profile description. Let's be real, physical attraction is the very first thing that kicks in.. Therefore, if she isn't impressed by you (or already has a full inbox) what makes someone think that just changing your description will do the trick smh.
I was told that my female friends, with whom I have been friends for years and hang out almost every single day, would want to date and fuck me because usually they do pay attention to what I say and compliment me.
To tease them and slowly drag them along. I mean, obviously don't just quickly jump into things but dragging things out just makes them lose interest and it wastes time.
The right one is out there for everyone. It’s bullshit and keeps people from productive relationships because they think they haven’t found perfection.
If there were someone out there for everyone, nobody would get divorced or die alone. Some people don't deserve love because they're not respectful or caring enough
Yet, you constantly see, "How would you describe the PERFECT boyfriend?"... Well, there isn't one. You can describe qualities you'd like, but you'll never get all of what you like in one person and perhaps the other things about that person that you wouldn't choose are better qualities anyway...
Yep, and I think it’s about connection more than actual attributes. My wife and I don’t share a lot of preferences. But we have a connection that lets us discuss complex stuff, make jokes with each other, and have a sexual attraction for each other.
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I’ve been told my whole life if a guy takes you out and is mean to you “it means he likes you”.. stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. There is nothing wrong with teasing the other person. But being directly rude or mean to someone obviously means he doesn’t like you that much.. another thing.. when you like a guy you should play hard to get and pretend you don’t like him.. from my experience it tends to confuse the men and send them in the other direction.
Too numerous to mentions. In my opinion, *most* dating advice is bad advice.
One thing I don't like is when someone says, "You two would be a perfect couple"... Unless they have a good reason to say that, it is usually a bad sign... LOL
True. I hod one instance of that, but friend prefaced it with "If he wasn't too old for you," so it wasn't pushy or anything
Listen to your own feelings and think for yourself. That might work because it means being #authentic.
I was told to date successful women such as lawyers and doctors and such and I did and it was terrible. Everyone i know keeps telling me that but i dont respect girls like that and have no interest in them. Id prefer some young church girl any day. Now dating is much much better.
Why is having a career such a turn off?
@pleasestopthis in and of itself it isn't. The problem is what you give up to have one. One thing men like is youth. An 18 year old lawyer is impressive but essentially impossible. Between an 18 year old gas station attendant and a 30 year old attorney, most men looking for marriage will choose the 18 year old.
Here is another example. A girl just gets out of school to be a doctor at 28. She is now not suitable for most men to consider having kids with. She MUST work because her student loans are due, so staying home with a baby is not an option unless the man can not only pay for him her and the baby but add in her degree. Or the child is destined for daycare. Personally as a man i dont like that option and would never purposely put myself in a situation to have kids in daycare. So now she's working 5 years before kids but damn she's already 28 so she will be 33 before having kids, now i have to start worrying about medical issues and time tables etc. A 20 year old waitress wouldn't have this problem.
There are more examples but essentially i see no benefit of women having education and careers to marriage and family oriented men.
Men like, youth, sweet personality, innocence, morals, caring motherly qualities, beauty, femininity just to name the most universally important ones. These qualities are how you attract family oriented men. How much money you make or how much education you have is not going to be even on the top 100 list of what men look for... yet you will sacrifice some of the things on this list to get a decent career.
Its basically shooting yourself in the foot in order to buy new nikes to run a race. Sure the best sneaks help but not when you have a hole in your foot. Lol
@pleasestopthis
A woman with a career is a turnoff to men who want a housewife. Women with careers are less likely to quit work to stay at home and raise their children
Yeah you got it. But men who want housewives typically are more successful and family oriented. Which seems pretty high demand from women these days. If you want some other kind of relationship dynamics like unmaried dual income no kids sort of thing and focus on materialistic pursuits then this doesn't apply. Then a man will want you to pull in just as much money as him.
I would not say 'worst'. But most useless are statements like:
"Just wait"
"It depends"
"Don't worry"
"I am atheist"
"Who cares"
...
I must admit that I have my own share in contributing (seemingly) unrelated 'advice' - often there is a line between one other line...
"Worst" ... could be a suggestion that (accidentally?) leads to a disaster if taken for serious?
Comments:
1) How long should she wait? Until she is dead?
2) Depends on what?
3) Are you a careless guy?
4) Oh, okay. So you hate church?
5) Yeah, right. Also why should she care about you?
@roland77 Ah - Do you mean that even meaningless comments can say something when we interpret them?
@andreasderjuengere Oh, guten Abend. ;-) I just commented on your quotes as I think about them: Don't let her wait to long, else she is gone (like chatting only once per week with her, to less!). Show her what matters to you (strong likes/dislikes, or where it is just okay). if she has worries, listen to her very close, she might have a reason to worry. Atheists are to foreigners considered as religion-haters, yes that is a stereotype again. I'm just open-minded to let her pray at my apartment, let her go to church and such but also wanted to be treated like that back. If she cares for something, that is good, don't play it down.
@roland77 Moin Moin :D... I placed these as 'typical' examples. "Worst advice" often is given with ABSENSE of advice, or even entirely unrelated to the issue.
@andreasderjuengere I never understood it other way. :-)
It was being given to a good friend of mine. That to get over her ex she should bed another man. I just thought it sounded ludicrous
There was one song that gave this bad advice and now there's a bunch of girls who actually follow it. So sad
What was the song?
@aWes0MeNeSs
Not sure. But I heard it on the radio the other day. I think it was may have been Pink
Tbh almost all the advice I got was bad.
I see a lot of guys here have gone 180 degrees from traditionally cheery bad advice to over applying/ misapplying the opposite pick up style advice.
Truth is somewhere in the middle.
Moderation is key
As an example, applied properly “fake it till you make it” is excellent advice. So is “be yourself”. But both are terrible when misapplied.
Never ask the guy first/initiate anything. You can subtly hint, but that's it. Guys like to be in control. Totally terrible advice 😂 luckily, I didn't follow it, and had a great time in my first relationship where I asked him to make it official, I asked him o dance at prom, and I initiated our first kiss. Better advice: Never sit idle just because someone else wants to feel powerful. Ask for what you want
I told my guy friend that the person I was chatting was asking for nude pictures. He told me that I should try sending one because I might bag myself a boyfriend. He's a shitty friend, I know.
The asker didn't mention anything able men in the question (only question not description)
Still all are taking about advises for men. That's a big irony. Girls don't need advice right. Guys compete to get a girl and girls advice other men to make them perfect for themselves. I'm not blaming anyone but we have to change this.
Is you think men and women are equal then it should be followed here too.
Listen guys don't think that you need to fulfill someone's requirements. If someone has their requirements then it's not love - it's a fuckin deal. You're not doing love buisness.
I will probably get hates for this, but I strongly dislike it when I ask for advice about my crush, and most people answer with "Tell him how you feel!!". This is kinda annoying. I always lived by the thought that taking small steps forward is better than immediately doing all the bigger things.
Is expressing feelings that big of a thing?
@Jamie05rhs Yes. Letting him know is a huge thing, because it basically decides what's happening next. It is better if you get to know each other first.
What, in your mind, is "happening next"? I'm truly curious.
@Jamie05rhs He can start to hate me
@Iwillfindyou21 How? Why?
@Jamie05rhs Teenage boys do not think in the same ways as adults do. You have to admit.
@Iwillfindyou21 I'm trying to think back on the time when I was a teenager. That was quite a while ago. However, I can't remember any instance whatsoever where I hated a girl because she expressed feelings for me. Only the one time when a girl drew a picture of a dick and gave it to me; I was grossed out by that. I guess if she showed a little more class I probably would have been okay with it. But you also have to realize I was only 14 at the time.
@Jamie05rhs I just don't want to tell, end of the story. It really is too risky.
@Iwillfindyou21 That is your choice.
Be yourself is the worst and the best advice someone can give you about dating.
The worst: I didn't have any social skill and I thought that if some girl didn't like me, it was her fault, no improve no changes...
The best: discover who you really are before going to the field ND after use this advice, it has presented me a lot of girls
Being authentic makes you attractive. Also showing her your emotions is best advice. Not showing such thing worst.
To change your profile description. Let's be real, physical attraction is the very first thing that kicks in.. Therefore, if she isn't impressed by you (or already has a full inbox) what makes someone think that just changing your description will do the trick smh.
I was told that my female friends, with whom I have been friends for years and hang out almost every single day, would want to date and fuck me because usually they do pay attention to what I say and compliment me.
To tease them and slowly drag them along. I mean, obviously don't just quickly jump into things but dragging things out just makes them lose interest and it wastes time.
"Make him jealous". That is a perfect gateway into an unhealthy relationship.
"Fake it til you make it" was probably the worst advice I got. Nothing gets a girl wetter than lying to her face.
*blatant sarcasm* in case it wasn't obvious.
Coming from you, I should hope it's sarcasm
Lol no need to hope. It was trash advice that I never bothered to try to see if it works or not.
I think "Fake it till you make it" is terrible advice in most cases. I certainly wouldn't want my surgeon applying that philosophy
Only ones that works for are actors. It's their job to be fake.
To accept what most girls do in regards to playing games and insecurities, because otherwise I'll always be alone
That's stupid. I'm not going to settle for something childish.
The right one is out there for everyone. It’s bullshit and keeps people from productive relationships because they think they haven’t found perfection.
If there were someone out there for everyone, nobody would get divorced or die alone. Some people don't deserve love because they're not respectful or caring enough
I agree thats why that phrase is bs.
Yet, you constantly see, "How would you describe the PERFECT boyfriend?"... Well, there isn't one. You can describe qualities you'd like, but you'll never get all of what you like in one person and perhaps the other things about that person that you wouldn't choose are better qualities anyway...
Yep, and I think it’s about connection more than actual attributes. My wife and I don’t share a lot of preferences. But we have a connection that lets us discuss complex stuff, make jokes with each other, and have a sexual attraction for each other.
Go ahead and fuck her friend it will make her jealous and she'll come baxk to you
Yeah that's up there on the list
That’s terrible
@Linda625 Yes it is. I really heard my friend this my other friend this 20 some years ago
Oh don’t do that again
@Linda625 well send a message
"Let him make the first move" held me back for years. If you want something go out and get it don't sit around waiting