I'm undecided on this one, if I would have came across this question a year or 2 ago I would have definitely have said "yes" in a heartbeat but I feel there are so many factors involved with attraction that confidence is just a part of it.
I think confidence is better for the individual 1st and foremost, and if being confident creates attraction that should just be a little extra reward for being self-assured rather than the main focus, because being to preoccupied with other people's perceptions of you isn't confident - that's being insecure.
BUT at the same time being overconfident can be very off-putting & unattractive because that shows a different side of being un-self-aware (yeah I made up a word, whatever) so there's an argument for it not being that important for attraction, but is that actual confidence? *that's more of "compensating for inadequacies" type of thing
The goal should be confidence based off of competency and a proper dose of self security, confidence like most things should be based off of a skill and general foundation of understanding/ability.
If you know what you're doing and how do it - you should be confident.
If you don't know what you are are doing and how to do it - you should feel uncertain and seek the skill/knowledge on how to do so.
In conclusion - confidence can create attraction but there are so many other factors involved that I can't just single it out over everything else. So I'm voting with a reluctant "yes".
The first things guys and girls look for in a partner *it will vary from person to person but I'll point out some common ones...
Both look for - appearance, personality, similarities
Guys look for - youth and beauty
Girls look for - success and maturity
In what order I don't know and same with emphasis on which aspect
I hope this was helpful, cheers.
You have to have confidence in yourself do you have to can only look for your partner to make you feel confident but you also have to put off that you are confident I know who you are
And what you have to offer and can never let your confidence
Google the names Brian Peppers and Lizzy Velasquez. Ask yourselves if confidence would make them more attractive?
By the way, Lizzy Velasquez *IS* confident. She has lived a life on her terms. She frequently speaks publicly. She carries herself like Wonder Woman. To me, she is awesome!
Brian Peppers was a very sad person. He is now dead, but his face was used as memes for the ugly all over the internet. He was a registered sex offender. He did not live life on his terms, but he had the additional disadvantage of being physically disabled.
I believe confidence can boost average looking people into being attractive. However, at the extremes, it doesn't help the unattractive, nor does its lack seem to hinder the very attractive. I also think that in *many* cases, one is confident *because* one is attractive, not necessarily that confidence makes one attractive.
Lol. The men that said it doesn't matter lack confidence. ;D
The only reason why confidence wouldn't be a factor is if someone wanted to manipulate a person, if that person is shy themselves, or if that person is attracted shy people. Honestly, I feel this is in the minority. Someone who lacks confidence is someone that is likely going to be high neurotic, constantly worrying, easily jealous, lacks emotional regulation---essentially a disaster for someone to date.
Of course confidence adds point.
It is like selling a product and the product is you. If you present it well it well sell and people will be convinced on how good the product is.
Also someone confident is someone comfortable with himself and knows what he wants in life and specifically a relationship.
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Confidence is great but I don't think it's realistic to expect anyone to be perfectly confident without insecurities either. Gotta remind yourself that you're human.
Confidence matters in romantic attraction to me. Not so much in physical.
But confidence is necessary.
Overconfidence is a joke, and it's very fun to pole at.
It makes a huge difference for me. I mean when I see some girl with a model-like figure looking all nervous at a social event, she does genuinely look less attractive to me in my eyes than more ordinary-looking one at the center being all friendly and chatting to everyone and laughing. Well, I'm an odd one but "personality" and "looks" to me are very blurry. I can't distinguish which one I'm attracted to exactly at times because how a girl looks is part of how I assess her personality.
My idea of confidence is very detached from ego though. I don't necessarily look at diva type with big attitude and see "confidence". I see "ego". I think of confidence as an absence of fear for the most part, or at least the absence of crippling fear that makes them all nervous. I often associate it with "genuineness" too, because you can't know what someone's genuine thoughts and actions are truly like if they're crippled by nervousness and fear. So I like a girl who can, say, be silly and even laugh and have a sense of humor about it. That's attractive to me. It comes across to me as "genuine" and "confident"... and fun.
its not attractive to me, not unattractive either but i like the people around me to shoe a decent about of human uncertainty and flaws, it feels more natural than someone who bigs themselves up all the time
It’s funny that most successful people feel that they are afraid to be found out as a fraud. I have read this multiple times over the years. Most confidence that I have seen is just people bullshitting.
Women suck at picking mates which is why the divorce rate is so high as women file the majority of the divorces.
Confidence isn't something I personally look for in women.
I actually prefer demure women over those who are "in your face", even if that means that they are a bit awkward/socially anxious.
There is place for cheek and sass, certainly, but I think that should come *after* we are already well acquainted with each other.
If someone slaps me with anything other than perfect propriety right off the bat, then I'm frankly going to be put off rather than enticed.
I don't think your "opposite gender" wording really belongs in this question. Never in my life have I met a man who looks at confidence as a defining feature of what is attractive in a woman. I think it's women who are attracted to confidence. Being shy/anxious as a man is a recipe for being rejected by women. More often than not, if you are a shy/anxious woman, it's cute and a guy will basically just come scoop you up and make you feel beautiful.
Absolutely. Especially to me. Confidence speaks volumes to a person's self esteem and ability to cope. Which are all things I find valuable in a relationship 🖤
Confidence is important in the way that your confident with who you are and being yourself and liking yourself. Because if you aren't confident in yourself or like who you are then how can you possibly expect someone to like you or who you are in return?
It definitely does, it is especially true for men. It is clear what type of men are more successful with girl, clue confident guys. It is written in Romance you'll find leading men are confident and charming.
It is true for women too, there is a reason men are drawn to confident women.
Honestly in certain cases with some girls, them projecting (pretending?) super amounts of confidence actually makes them even LESS attractive, as in if they're overweight or something and are acting like they're all hot? That's a massive turnoff, even moreso than if they just shut their mouth. Nothing is a bigger turnoff than a fat chick or a trashy chick who is acting like they're hot/pretty when they aren't. Best thing to do in that case is just be chill.
I say both
confidence can be awesome but there’s a thin line between confidence and being an asshole
yet a person can be ‘ good looking ‘ and not have confidence and it be a turn off
yet again a person can be ‘ ugly ‘ and have an amazing personality and it be a sexy thing
I don't think that it's over-rated. It might be over-abused when people mistake aggression for "confidence", however.
Confidence definitely matters. A girl I dated for a long time had major confidence/self-esteem issues and it totally sucked the life out of our relationship.
Someone with confidence just shows I have a good idea of what I may be getting into. Not much of a journey. Majority of the women I dated were just that. Its overrated to me. My opinion.
For me yes. I really like confident people. But here again, there's a fine line between confidence and over confidence. If someone has stepped over the line, I'll be more aggravated
One of the biggest lies women managed to force into near-belief.
Make no mistakes, The number of women on this site who'd date an ugly overweight guy if he happened to be "confident" is the exact same number of times I'd get a "yes" if I asked Jennifer Aniston out a million times: ZERO
ANY woman who claims otherwise is a liar.
Overrated by a mile. The problem is every guy fakes confidence so much it's a turn off. Where have all the honest guys gone
Its overrated as fuck and its fake most of the time
Every girl and dude has its type and prefference when it comes to attraction
How you define an attractive person - by the way he or she looks
Use ur brain people 🥳🥳🥳
to me an over confident man has to big of an ego and I do not need that type of man for a long term relationship ! thanks
It doesn't matter but it doesn't help either. If she appears confident in certain ways, then I feel out of her league.
Being unconfident is kinda like a smart guy acting like he's not smart enough so everyone else will end up getting the vibes that he's not smart.
Think of it this way... if a man promises that he confident he can protect you and them wimps out the last minute, how attractive is that?
I think confident people have the most problems. It's like they're disguising something. Then you find these confident people do drugs behind the scenes or are the most insecure people in the world. They just know how to hide it well.
It really makes you stand out from the crowd though 🙋♂️
I think it matters more to women than men because timidness in a woman can be perceived as cute but women find men that lack confidence as less masculine
A man MUST have confidence to win over the ladies. An imperative.
For women it's more about moving everything forward more expediently. She's not so wishy-washy if she's confident.
Oh, in MY eyes? No, I voted B. If I'm completely honest, I actually like self contious women. I like complimenting the hell out of them and boosting their confidence. :p
Confidence sure makes a woman more attractive to me
Confidence is really important when it comes to attraction
Would a guy that rides wheelies on the freeway and isn't afraid to take a punk but is a little shy, just a little, confident enough?
It does make them more attractive, but there's a fine line between being confident and egotistic
It amplifies a person attractiveness, yes. That being said, I think the effect is stronger for women being attracted to confident men than vice versa.
Of course confidence is an attractive and appealing quality.
Definitely does make her more attractive. It shows she's lively and tend to be friendly and outgoing vs a woman who is shy that comes off as don't talk to me or bug me.
I think it affects the way women feel about men more than the opposite.
I'll take your basic "good looking woman with confidence" over an insecure "hottie" any day. That shit gets old fast.
confidence is only the cherry on top in my opinion. it only works if she's already attractive to me, not if she isn't.
Confident is 60% looks a confident men who is ughly is just called cocky asshole yet when his attractive is a charming funny man
Confidence can be faked, I do a very good impression of being confident with a long casting time and cool down.
Well as long as you dont say " I dont feel I'm worth this or I'm not good looking enough for this " every 5 seconds it's cool not all are confident and that is ok
It mostly just matters to women.
Men just want a girl who is mentally stable.
Probably more important to women (in men) than the other way around. Most women don't want a meek dude.
I do not know, but I am a guy that would get lost in the crowd if not for my personality so in definitely helps in my case.
Key word "more". Of course confidence is always attractive.
Its rather nebulous as a concept so it can mean different things to different people. So I don't know. Also hard to measure it. So its not something i really consciously think about generally
Confidence is very attractive and important to me personally.
I think real confidence to be attractive... But confidence on air is unuseful
yup. it's not something you can fake well so you need to feel it
Yes it does... as long as its humble. ? I loathe anyone who's cocky about it...
Confidence means a lot, it is not only attractive is necessary for a healthy relationship.
It matters more to women.
Guys don't demand you be confident. It's not that it can't have some appeal, but it's generally a bit less.
Confidence doesn't matter that much when it comes to attraction
Just like i expected. Women seek confidence more than men. Men don't care confidence that much.
I think It definitely makes a person more attractive
Confidence show they are decisive and not "wishy washy"
I think it's more of a personal perspective. Confidence is important to me.
ofcourse confidence is attractive nobody likes weirdos who dont know themselves are insecure and weak.
No it helps but if it to much or force then does matter.
Confidence is okay
As long as you can be yourself and express your truth I don't mind one bit :)
Would date a guy who not sure of himself or his feelings for you?
Confidence doesn't matter that much when it comes to attraction
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