What personality traits are important to have in a partner?

[Anonymous]

For me, she must be intelligent. Her IQ score needs to be at least 120. There is nothing I can learn from the average and below average IQ. They will never understand the complexities of things like STEM fields. If you cannot understand basic calculus, then you can’t claim that you’re intelligent, and therefore I would pass on getting to know you. But that’s just me.

[Anonymous]

I think your requirement is quite insufficient and vague, because a high IQ alone doesn't grant a lot of other very important aspects of a relationship.
The only aspect you're taking in account is the possibility to share with her technical contents and possibly your hobbies, the way you live them and the way you reason. You can get this already with a friend without needing to get a girlfriend, though. And while the lack of contents to share can be a deal breaker (as it is for myself too), many other things can collapse in a relationship.
A high IQ girl doesn't grant to be also: • empathetic, to understand your problems and side during arguments; • mature, to not get overtriggered about everything and paranoid and to face problems with pragmatism; • not-too-egocentric, to grant a mutual respect; • trustful, to not get overcontrolling; • independent, to not get clingy/needy/sticky as hell; • cultured, to have always contents to discuss; • open-minded, to not clash with your opinions about society and politics.
And many, many, many others. You'll see how much you'll become more selective about required traits, one ex after the other, that will make you understand what you -don't- want, in a girl. ;)
I can absolutely grant you that two partners with high IQ don't grant anything, because I have a higher IQ than average (I was born like that, I was that kind of special kids who get examined and get special treatments), and even, I have generally male attitudes and interests (and male friends only, as consequence), so I should seem really matching with male nerds, right? I have also a very low emotional intelligence, not a surprise. Well, my partners were all gifted as well about IQ, as I couldn't stand to not be able to share my world with a partner, so I naturally filtered them. Guess what, none of them lasted more than 1 year and I got pissed of them already after 2 months. They ended all because of completely different reasons than IQ or boredom, though. Even, one of them, the only one who rejected me, who is also the one with higher IQ I ever met, preferred girls who were exceptionally empty, simple, not intelligent, unaware, ingenuous and basic. That proves the matching of IQs is not that needed apparently, but that was only him.

Said that, after 8-9 stories in my life that didn't work, you can imagine what a shitload of requirements I would be able to list now. ;p I wrote them to a friend recently because he really really wanted to know that, and I wrote a wall of text of them. Longer than this one, yeah. Not gonna write them here again, although some are already hinted in this post.

Ehhh bless those simple girls who only require a banana... Or those who claim to demand a guy who is protective, sensible, strong, mature, cultured, and then fall for the most toxic/narcissist/cheap/failed guys on the market. Bless, bless, bless those simple souls.

[Asker]

Emotions are worthless and weak. I couldn’t care less about them. The high IQ will innovate our world. There is nothing to learn from the low IQ.

[Opinion Owner]

I don't understand how your reply is contextual with what I written, I assume you didn't read it at all, but fine enough...

Anyway, if emotions are worthless for you in this period of life, then you aren't looking for a relationship but for a cooperation, a colleague, and not necessarily female. Probably you have to reconsider what you are looking for... If you have projects to realize you can totally get mates who are interested in your ideas without needing to seduce them (or else, if you get into the "relationship" context, by definition it includes mainly emotions at the base). Yeah, you're not looking for a relationship at the moment.

[Yads_Is_Back]

I won’t judge you for that since I’m a 147 😅 but to each his/her own. Not saying a high IQ is a bad thing, I like a smart guy, but it’s not everything to me. He needs some everyday wisdom too. Don’t tell me they always have both because Albert Einstein couldn’t even tie his own shoe but look at all that he discovered.

To answer the question more directly, I love what the other girl said about brutal honesty and not trying to chicken out over telling the truth. So honesty is a big one for me. Don’t lie to me, I don’t care what it’s about. The smallest lie or half-truth will get you dumped and I won’t care.
He needs to be open - not just with the truth but just in conversation. You’d be surprised how many people can’t communicate.
I like a hard-working man, one who would do anything to provide for a family. Doesn’t mean he’s gonna be the only one working or that I won’t make more than him, but the characteristic shows responsibility. He needs to be responsible.
I like a dominant man. He establishes his role and is firm about it.
He can’t be stuck-up. Be confident and nice or go home.
I like a religious man who’s in touch with his spirit and emotions, so passionate.
As far as personality, that’s pretty much all I demand.

[WesBrewer]

As long as we can talk to each other like a normal relationship personality doesn't matter to me.

[boggboss]

So before u are allowed to get to know them u would have them take a iq test?

[Asker]

Pretty much. Or at least show me that you can understand complex STEM topics like computer programming, engineering, complex mathematics, etc. All other subjects show no signs of intelligence.

[boggboss]

Meh fair enough altho I'm not sure u will be finding a women with that approach but good luck

[CurlyGirl42]

I am pretty sure most with an average IQ can do basic calculus if they sit down and learn it xD I studied a STEM field (where you need complex math) and some of my fellow students were not that sharp with math. But they were still into the science so they just worked harder on that part.

To your actual question:
I value honesty very highly. I prefer someone who is brutally honest over hiding from conflicts.
Someone who takes initiative; can take care of himself (for example ask for help if needed) and would also take care and responsibility in making the relationship work out.

[Asker]

It’s not true. The average IQ person would get burned out by complex math equations. For a low IQ person, it would be like trying to figure out quantum mechanics. Trying harder doesn’t mean anything if you don’t have the genetics (IQ) to understand that material. The low and average IQ cannot teach me anything of value.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Love what you said about brutal honesty and not hiding from conflict.
But anon is right about the cal. I think by basic calculus he meant at least past the part where you can’t memorize formulas and you actually have to solve a big whole problem logically by manipulation and track your progress. I think by basic calculus you think he means pre-cal where you are given formulas and you just plug in the numbers. Lol

[CurlyGirl42]

well you did say basic, not complex.. anyway today people can and do use computers/calculators to solve complex equations... I seriously did sit and studied exactly quantum mechanics with a friend, and she used her calculator all the time to solve the integrals, while others just did them in their head. Today she has a PhD, and I am sure she can teach you a hell lot about her field. I am not sure about her IQ, but my guess is closer to 100 than 120.
In most STEM fields, besides for example math or some fundamental physics on the more abstract level, you do not even need to do the math yourself, and can manage by getting solutions elsewhere. I also know a fair amount of people in the fields of biology and medicine who are especially struggling with the math and statistics. As long as they are passionate to learn and work on their topic they can make it all the way.

I do think it is fair you want someone intelligent. But I am against placing IQ as the important factor.. maybe with the exception that you really want to learn math (not other STEM fields) from your romantic partner xD

[SirJeffers]

Wow. Good luck with that. 😂😂

[Asker]

Is it not possible?

[SirJeffers]

To ignore and shun every woman you meet that doesn't at least understand calculus? Not saying it's not possible, but you're going to live a lonely life. Intelligence is important, yes, but setting that high of a standard and saying that everyone else isn't worth your time is irrational. Hell, I'm a fairly intelligent person in my opinion and I could give a shit less about calculus. Don't know the first thing about it. And don't know many people that do. So possible? Absolutely! Logical? Not at all.

[Asker]

What can the low IQ provide me? What stimulus can they give me? I cannot learn a thing from someone who can barely understand basic concepts on how to analyze the world and apply it to build a greater society.

[SirJeffers]

Leave the book smarts for the class room and realize that there is more to learn in life than what's in books. Real life is not and never will be like anything you read. Having common sense and decent morals is way better to me. But that's just me. You do you. Everyone has a right to what they want, I just don't see it being too productive. You can learn so many things about women, yourself, and the world around you if you find the right girl. And I guarantee you that she probably won't know shit about calculus.

[Asker]

“Book smarts”, which is a term made up by average and low IQ people to make theirselves feel better about having a different version of intelligence, is what gives us the latest and greatest technology. Do you honestly think that low IQ people created the formula for the COVID vaccine? Or that low IQ people gave us computers? There is nothing to learn from someone who only knows common sense. The reason it’s called common sense is because it’s common. It isn’t rare nor hard to understand.

[SirJeffers]

And that's your opinion. You can value high level intelligence all you want, I'm not saying you're wrong. But can you build a house? Can you fix your car? Or your appliances when they break? Do you know how to grow your own food or hunt and fish for your own meals? Can you survive a weekend in the woods? There is so much more to life than what a professor will teach you and until you learn that, you're not really living in my opinion. I can't tell you anything about gene sequencing or micro computers or what happened in 1602, but I would be fairly optimistic saying that I know more than you about life and the world. And I know you're way smarter that me.

[SirJeffers]

Add art to the mix and there's a whole other level to life. Some of the best artists and musicians that have influenced our culture and lifestyle probably didn't know anything about vaccines or computers either. I just think you need to broaden your look at intelligence.