Has dating made you lower your expectations in life?

[Anonymous]

Do you feel the need to settle for a simple life with your partner, or has it made you dream to get it all. That is, have a bigger house, car...

[jennifer_bloom]

I care more about the guys looks and personality than I do about his income or capability because I don’t believe I can have every thing I want in a guy so I will isolate for those traits I want at the expense of others like mobility or money. I know girls more attractive than me who can have all 4 traits but I don’t believe I have that option.

[FilmGuy93]

No, I would say that dating has actually made it easier for me to focus my own wants and desires. It helps to be able to describe in a very clear and concise way when someone is either taking advantage of you, or disrespecting you and your boundaries. I heard a phenomenal TED talk last night where a psychologist said "the opposite of belonging is fitting in," and I believe that dating is a prime example of when having a desire to fit in and conform to someone else's desires and expectations actually destroys your ability to determine your identity for yourself. Dating can lead to some wonderfully productive experiences if you have the capacity for self reflection and you genuinely believe that you are worthy of love.

[Anonymous]

We have differing opinions on what "get it all" is. To answer your question. NO! Dating has made me want to settle less. As the days, weeks, months and years pass. I continue to grow and progress. Most women I meet don't they either stagnate or regress. Worst of all they have the audacity to judge me lol. Most women are a losing proposition that's the simple truth.
The simple truth is I'm a very understanding guy. But I'm not going to gamble on inviting a wrecking ball to enter my life. I'm happy enough to stay single than mortgage my future.

[Xoxocutekitty]

No definitely not. When I was young I thought that I had to throw 100% of my energy into making a relationship work.

As I dated more, I realized that I should expect the same level of effort that I put in, else I was really lowering my expectations because I was too busy trying to be the perfect partner (instead of being treated well by a wholesome human being).

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

A bigger house, a car isn't "having it all" ... To me "having it all" would be having that one person that loves/cherishes you and will be there with you/for you

[CallmeTheKnight]

To be honest, years ago before I actually started dating seriously, it did. However now I raised my standards to be equal or a reflection of my current life that I live. If people lower their standards, that's okay, but they have to be mindful of the people they allow in their life.

[DiegoO]

The only romantic relationship I ever had was online. Before that, I honestly didn't had a solid base of what kind of woman I want in my life. Now I know for sure, is why I decided to don't seek romantic relationships for a moment. I need to solves certain aspects of my life before entering a relationship.

[JustAnj]

What's dating haha I'm joking but honestly have never dated. So I guess I kinda don't know what dating is. I don't think I ever will either since I am married.

[Jamie05rhs]

How did you get married without dating?

[JustAnj]

@Jamie05rhs
We just went straight into a relationship. We were also teenagers so dating was not really a big deal to us. I was 16 and he was 17.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

It's actually raised it.

I know more about myself, my standards, and what makes me happy. I know now what my minimum is for acceptable partners.

[Jamie05rhs]

"have a bigger house, car"
What does that have to do with dating?
They are completely separate things.

[Uptowngirl88]

Ok I thought it was just me. I had to read her question twice in order to find the correlation between her question and dating. I see no correlation whatsoever

[Jamie05rhs]

Ikr?

[Alyssa11]

No it just made me realise a lot of things are out of my control. And letting go is the best thing you can do.

[Anonymous]

My dreams have nothing to do with having a big house or a car. I dream of a small house near a lake, with my pets and with a man who loves me.

[weeee]

Glad to know im not alone

[JennBITx]

I still have high expectations. If they want to be with me. They need to earn it and be worthy of it

[krin_m]

Nope! when I was dating, my expectations always increased until I settled into two committed relationships. Now I do not need to date anymore to find what i want.

[DaMack999]

Yes that's normal symptom of most men. When they are too attached to the family v s too attached to their job.

[innerman]

Started out when am all for the legendary samurai... but now even a kitchen knife sounds fine.
That’s how lower my expectations have fallen

[Curiousnesshmmm]

Well I hope one day everyone learns that owning things does t make you happy

[pink_and_inlove]

No but it’s made me think about marriage and having kids for the first time

[RunningWithScissors1]

Life isn't about how many toys you can leave behind when you die. It's about what you did while you were here

[Mofunfour20]

No, its raised my expectations for myself. Nobody's responsible for my well being and peace of mind but ME

[Uptowngirl88]

I dont get your question? What does this have to do with dating?

[Makeushiver]

It's made masturbation a viable choice.

[Scottty2hottty]

No they actually made them higher. I deserve more I just need to realze it.

[Janessa2021]

I lower my expectations but not my standards

[Hanrej]

Some of them yes, others have increased.

[kevyhanma]

No but my 2 suicide attempts did

[Anonymous]

Actually, it's made me give up altogether.

[EaterPeter]

Yes.

[ItsMeItsMe1989]

yeah

[Abdulwahh]

I have high standards but im not delusional

[CantGetItUp]

It has