Am I too old to NOT be dating?

Question

I have no desire to date, but I'm kinda pushing 30 now, so I'm wondering if it's time to start dating. 🤔

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

There's no right or wrong answer with this. There's advantages and disadvantages to being single and being as a part of a couple.

But I'll just say this - the more years a person spends living alone, the more they form patterns, preferences, and tend to get set in their ways. There's no one to compromise for (and compromise is no fun) but it's like a muscle that isn't exercised. It becomes harder to adapt to others, the more time goes by. Independence and self-reliance is great. But it does have some drawbacks as well. Older people do tend to have firmer options on all sorts of things, and rigidity of thinking is noticeable.

Physically, you're in your prime in your 20s (all people are), and you have the most energy you'll ever have, just by a factor of age. So it's a nice time to get together with people. (In addition to the psychological mentioned above.) I'm not sure about using the word "wasted", as it's a bit harsh, but it's better for you to use it on yourself, than others to make such a judgement.

My personal advice to you, and anyone in their 20s, is yes, date. Meet people. Don't go into it being so serious that you take all the fun out of it. Just look at it as a time to meet people. Have genuine curiosity about them, and they will pick up on that. You don't have to have any more of an agenda than that. It also puts less pressure on them (especially guys; they hate relationship pressure), and if you don't want casual sex, be absolutely upfront about that so you don't waste your or their time, but just try to have realistic expectations. Particularly today, guys think women's expectations are totally out of whack. But most girls don't want some guy who just wants sex and to put in little effort for anything real. So weed through them, dig around, have standards, but also approach it as getting to know some nice people who will broaden your mind about the world.

DarkCarousel · Accepted Answer

It has nothing to do with age, though I’m sure you’ll hear from some that you’re wasting your prime. You have to be ready, or at least open, for it to work for you.

ChiTown33 · Accepted Answer

When I was younger I went against the grain on most things. For example I never developed the taste for alcohol. Ergo I would never drink it in social situations where everyone else was and it alienated me from the group. In the grand scheme of things this isn't a big deal. I'm just saying by going against the group you make yourself suspect (maybe a snob) in their eyes.
Dating though? It's only unusual from the simple fact that most people WANT companionship. It makes me wonder if you've had some trauma in the past that is overriding your natural drive to want to date.
Whatever you feel. Personally no I don't think there is anything wrong with NOT dating (so long as it's for healthy reasons) I mean there's nothing worse than being with someone that you're just going through the motions just because society says "this is what's normal or successful". They may really love you and you're not being fair to them.
So follow your feelings. Do what's right for YOU. And be happy. Life is short.

Inexpensivefurniture · Accepted Answer

There's no point in dating right now if it's not what you want. I don't see what the pressure is just because you're nearing 30. It's not like there's an age limit on dating. Do it when it feels right, whether that's right now or 10 years down the road or never

Cynicaldreamer · Answer

If you're too old not to be dating, then I'm REALLY pushing it at 36! LOL

There is no set timeframe to be dating. Much less an age you should be "settled down," married, or even have your life in order by... contrary to what society might tell you. You said yourself you have no desire to date right?

... then why date right now?
Seriously, don't force yourself to do something just to make others happy, or follow the norms of society. Otherwise you'll wind up settling, or worse, miserable trying to find someone that isn't right for you. Dating is a headache as is. Now imagine dating if you're not in the mood to or motivated to-

Exactly. You do you, okay? Enjoy the single life :) I am. I have no urge to date right now and that's okay! No one pressures me to date, I don't feel obligated to, and if the right person comes into my life, I'll date him on my terms.
And trust me, when you're ready to date, you'll want to date and put yourself out there. And not because you're getting old, or feel pressured by your friends, family, or some other reason to do so.

Account · Answer

I will be 30 on August 31 and I have no desire of doing that. But that is up to each individual.

Miristheiss · Answer

What are your goals?

Do you want romance? Do you want a family and kids and a husband? Do you have no interest in that and you are content with just being active with friends but you have no interest in sex, male/female chemistry and romance?

It depends on what your goal is?

If you want marriage... start pursuing that.
If you just want some male companionship from time to time and some physical action from time to time... date.
If you are content alone and prefer socializing with friends and family then do nothing and just keep things the way you are.

Robertcw · Answer

🤷🏻‍♂️ I feel the same way. But I have legitimate reasons for not dating (pushing the boundries of what could ve considered 'homeless.').

If you have reasons then okay, if you're just being lazy though... ehh I think that might be not a great decision because of life not being eternal. Even if you aren't wasting your youthfulness, I mean life ends between 65 and 80 for most people. There are only so many months available to live, you either live them single or not single. I suppose it depends on which way you would rather live.

ChrisBlue1 · Answer

Nothing to do with age and if you wanna date then date , if not then do not! Just do you, The world and their proper "Society" Rulebook of what people are supposed to do and not do according to whoever? The Tooth Fairy , lol Sorry I don't subscribe to that worldly rule book. Like I said Do whatever it is you feel comfortable doing! Plus It's none of your business what other people think about you ! And if friends or whoever are hooked up with someone and pestering you to do what they do, Then they are probably miserable with their choices and want you to join their BOO HOO express cause they are jealous of you!~ LOL

Novacane · Answer

I would say it is never too late to start dating! Of course, at this, it might be a little more difficult than dating when you are young but it's possible. Also being a woman you won't have that much difficulty finding a significant other compared to men.

ohshee · Answer

Hell no you should go dating anytime you can anytime you want hell I would date you but I was living by you LOL well I mean I would try to I don't think there's an age limit on anything in this world it's not how old you are it's how many minutes you've been alive

0112358 · Answer

Voted C.

You're a little old to be wondering if you should date now versus "later". If you have no interest in dating now, I wouldn't assume you're magically going to develop a desire later. However you feel about dating now, I'd consider there's a high chance that "this is it".

SGTAdam · Answer

I would say date whenever you're ready. I'm 34 years old and haven't been in a relationship in 13 years. I've always felt like I'm not ready, and that personally nobody would want to date somebody that is not financially doing well. I mean I live with my mom, sister, sisters husband, and my niece, and the youngest is 20 years old and I just feel I don't know 😐 I usually dislike talking about it. Anyways do what you like and I guess whatever makes you feel comfortable.

NYCQuestions1976 · Answer

You're free to date or not date at any age you choose. If you're contemplating dating now, maybe that's your subconscious giving you a nudge. Or you could just be posting a random question to create interesting content for us to answer. Only you know, and everyone is different. There's no set way or rule book to follow when it comes to @beebella dating, other than what @beebella wants and likes. 👍

Kaamraj · Answer

Women's sexual mean value (SMV) goes down with age because of increasing age, declining fertility and competition (everyday a girl turns 18). Whereas a man's value increases because of experience, income, and status within society. Normally marriages are when both values intersect.

Gemlover · Answer

Date when you're ready don't make someone else's life miserable because you really don't want to go out with them and when you do date date with a purpose make sure you're both even yoked and on the same page

ArrowheadSW · Answer

Well, do what you are comfortable with. If you don't have the desire to date I see nothing wrong with sitting on the sidelines for now. Any particular reason why you don't want to date or you just don't have any inclination towards it?

Little_Bumblebee · Answer

Don't date if you don't want to. What good will it lead to?

Why should being in a relationship be the most important thing?
You date when you feel ready for it.

Maybe you meet someone when you least expect it.

TremorJay · Answer

You can put yourself out there, but if it doesn't happen naturally I don't think it's worth the trouble.

RealMarek · Answer

It depends on whether you want to have children. If so, time is of the essence. If not, there is no pressure, although be aware that dating is easier for women than it is for men in their 20s but more difficult for women than men at some point in their 30s.

Anonymous · Answer

Depends on if you like the idea if scrambling to find an 11th hour relationship in order to have kids and are comfortable with potentially ending up alone and childless.

If you want until you're in your thirties it mean choosing among losers or men with a record of failed relationships.

Anonymous · Answer

I know people are being nice, but the answer really is A.

The longer you wait, the more problems you may start to experience with your body, and the less attractive you will appear to men in comparison to younger women.

This is the honest fact of the matter, upheld by countless accounts of older single women.

Apple1996 · Answer

I wouldn't say your wasting your good years but you are wasting your baby making years (if you want any babies) but dating at any age is fine. There is no rush to find love

Iron_Man · Answer

That’s what happens when you’re bisexual you’re just so confused you don’t have any desire to date and you’re tired of living that life of sleeping around and you want something meaningful but you don’t know which side to pick. No real man is going to be married to you and you are out sleeping around with the same sex believe me. You may not like this post but you need a wake up call and I’m the guy for it

mk200195 · Answer

You're NEVER too old to date!  It's like asking "am i too old to eat ice cream"  Enjoy life. Don't think if everything as needing a productive reason. Just do something for the joy of it!

Miah02 · Answer

Age ain't got nothing to do wit it. It's if you're ready to date. Someone may never want to date.  Start dating when you're ready, and if that day doesn't come than it doesn't

exitseven · Answer

You can wait until you are ready. You want to be really motivated when you date it is much better that way.

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

Only you know when's right for you to date. And society can fuck off if it thinks it can suggest a time line. Love on your own terms, always.

fonduegirl · Answer

Do you want a kid? If not, don't give a fuck about your running clock. You still have many years to come where you'll find the one. Or not. It's all good.

Vietnemin · Answer

Me too I’m 31 and don’t date but dating sounds like a mess and I want to bypass it to marriage as much as possible. Maybe we should date beautiful one 😊

iseekpinetrees · Answer

If your not looking at all and ur not putting urself in situations to meet someone your just gunna be alone. Also by the time ur 35 you have a harder time having kids and higher changes for autism and other higher risk issues.

Dchrls78104 · Answer

Date when you think you're ready! I don't date, because I have not found the right girl for me and I won't take chances with the wrong one; but you do you.

Bee-Hatch · Answer

Don't date because you feel you should. Date because you want to

EnglishEuropean · Answer

Here's a little song that I think you'll find both amusing and educational.

Anonymous · Answer

Technically (as a female) you are wasting your best years. But, if you aren't interested in dating then don't do it. not everyone is meant to date or have sex or be in a relationship. I encourage all men to stay out of relationships because they are stacked against guys

TadCurious · Answer

Bella I voted for no, just date whenever you're ready to date. 😀😊🙋‍♂️

TacosRAwesome · Answer

If you're happy with not dating etc then that's absolutely your choice. No one has to do something just because society says you should.

TallAnon · Answer

I'm just a bit younger than you, 26 soon, but I personally feel that if I wait too long, the most awesome women will be taken. So too old, no, but the sooner we start, the better we end up with?

AndrewMG · Answer

Oh I'm too lazy and old to go out and chase a date, I'll the invite chase me lol

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Women have all of the dating power in their 20's. Once you hit 30 you power in dating begins to drop off sharply.

Anonymous · Answer

That's no reason to, wait until you're ready and 100% want it. No Desire = disastrous relationships. Why? Because you don't really want it, so you're going to put little/no effort into it. He'll sense that, as would you if it was reversed.

RHK36 · Answer

Unless you want to have your own kids, it's all up to you and what you want out of life.

TheAfrikan · Answer

It is never too late to date someone or to be in love. what matters is you getting your the one whom you relate with.

dolemite89 · Answer

if u do want kids eventually ur starting to get into that age range where u need to find a baby daddy soon lol

Xylem1992 · Answer

Dating when you have no desire to so, is not going to do anybody any good.

InferiorElegy · Answer

Your life, your decision and no one else can make it for you.

stevo94 · Answer

You've got to do what's good for you. If you don't want to then don't.

insignificant_person · Answer

Why should I give you advice about your life? I think that you should do everything you want to. And there are plenty of men who are starting to dating at this age and would be so happy to meet you.

Omario2049 · Answer

Why wouldn't u be dating? At 27 u are at risk. Quick question, are u during this time sexually active? And what are u working on personally while not dating?

White_Boy_506 · Answer

Nawwwww there’s plenty of people that date in their 30’s.

Wiredone · Answer

as long as You don't want kids there is no rush. You date when you are ready. Nobody is forcing you to do it.

Amaya0909 · Answer

Dating when you are ready and not because of people say.

Pj1981 · Answer

For real if you're happy not dating that's all that really matters.

Marhaban-1 · Answer

Best till last also applies when getting a partner. X

Anonymous · Answer

You need life insurance and go ahead and make funeral arrangements. You are too old.

FamilyGuy2020 · Answer

Why wouldn't you date? I am 56Yo and divorced with a son and daughter both college graduates and living on their own.

Dsg1193 · Answer

I’m curious because I’m around the same age. Do you have the desire to have sex tho

ToastyOats · Answer

L. Your testosterone levels are probably super low.

smahala1991 · Answer

I'm 30 and not dating

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

No! Just keep doing whatever makes you happy.

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

Yes. That’s why we should date

Gry_Odegaard · Answer

Um if you don't have a desire to then don't

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

You are never too old to date.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Naw, you date when you feel ready to do so

Am I too old to NOT be dating?

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