Guys how successful are you at providing emotional security in your relationship?

[lightbulb27]

How do you do it what are your best approaches

[Faerum]

Im honestly not sure what you mean by “emotional” security. So my answer may seem off.


There are a lot of things I do to make my wife secure in our relationship.
Self confidence is a huge one, so I always make sure to express how attractive the body parts she hates are. I make sure to constantly reassure her that I love her, and express that using her love languages.


Continue to flirt with her and show that you desire her and everything about her. Be there emotionally and listen to her, respond quickly with reassurance and agreement.

[MarkyyG123]

Emotional security is essential to a successful relationship and that goes hand in hand with communication, communication is the foundation of any relationship. Females are naturally meant to be more open and more vocal however this is not always the case. As a guy when you find someone you want to be open with, being there for them emotionally means your there to listen to them, understand them, ask the right questions and genuinely listen - provided their willing to talk. If she is the right one for you, she'll appreciate this. Things will always go side ways where there is a lack in communication and this isn't always on the part of the guy. Relationships are a 50/50, a give and a take.

[midnightmoon05]

I heard 50/50 all the time…
We know it will never be …
Around that range is good and healthy - give and take…

When off like 70/30… time to have some discussions to bring it back.

[MarkyyG123]

@midnightmoon05
50/50 is ideal and often in a relationship it can be a little unrealistic as there is always things that happen in life you rely on your partner to help you through, changes that dynamic but your exactly right! There needs to be clear and open discussions to bring things back and let your partner know how you feel

[dustybiker]

Just tossing out there.. If a man listens, really listens with full, calm, attention. You don’t have to do anything else. Just be present for the moment needed. That brings such comfort.
If you ever need it from her, just ask (kindly). I bet it would feel good for you too.

[DizzyDesii]

I’d like to read these answers because a lot of the time, the guy calls the girl too emotional and the girl often asks the guy to be more emotionally open/available.

[Leonharted]

Been married for over a decade, and happily married at that. So I imagine I'm quite good. My advice is to listen to what your lady says. Really hear what she's saying. Doesn't matter if you think it's dumb or not. She thinks its important, otherwise she wouldn't be saying it. If you want her to listen to you when you are talking, then you should do the same. Ditto for children, if you ever have them.

[midnightmoon05]

Agree!! You two have kids?

[Leonharted]

I do. They are the most wonderful stress I’ve ever had.

[Lliam]

My wife is ambitious and hard working, so I often tell her how proud I am of her.
I tell her that she's beautiful. Or when she's dressed to go out, I tell her how cute she looks. I'm often charmed and amused by her femininity, but not in a condescending way.
I'm grateful for everything she does for me and around the house, and I do everything I can to help out and make her life easier. We're a team.
We talk about how each other's day went, and about other things, too.
I'm there to listen to her, provide encouragement, and be supportive if she's feeling down. She often asks for my opinion or advice.

[midnightmoon05]

Happy to see good relationships… the work we put in shows with love.

[Tabasco25]

In my experience just listening and being there , in my part of the world socially girls just want a listen ear. they don't usually want a fix it up man. But listening to other social circles in the world has left me not sure anymore , greatly depends on the individual girl. Communication helps us guys know what girls need.

[lightbulb27]

you raised another aspect which is "fixing us". you've never been asked to change? maybe you aren't as messed up as others.

[Tabasco25]

I've never had a girlfriend so I have never been asked to change. Usually people I know just disappear and stop talking to me for whatever reason with out communication. Like what happened? Still feeling a little lost about those people.

[lightbulb27]

I misread what you said. I think you said most women don't want a man who needs fixed. I'll disagree with that, some love projects.
sorry to hear, I didn't have a real girlfriend til well into 40s, can relate.

[Tabasco25]

Oh ya, I did mean that most in my social circle don't want a fix a man XD...
And ya I want a girl friend hopefully before I get to old

[MCheetah]

Eh. Maybe a 5 out of 10. I am a supporting, caring person, but I am not that much of an empath, if that makes sense. Like, I'll try my best to help you, cause it's the "right" thing to do, but I may not be that emotionally invested, because it may be something I just care about. "Oh, your mom's dog died. That's a shame," I'll say un-sarcastically, while eating a bag of Doritos.

[CasuallySamsonite]

Very successful, last woman I dated and I had to break up because she kept stopping her anxiety medication (against my telling her that she really did need it) because she just felt so relaxed and comforted by being with me...

Providing great emotional support is easy, you just have to care... really care and communicate and pay attention and actually give a f*ck.

[sensible27]

I don't know what you mean by emotional security, but I'd assume how to other person feels is decently important. It's in a way correlated to growth, and I'm not really sure how much else of a value a relationship has if that part is taken out possibly

[midnightmoon05]

Last sentence 😊👍

[slatyb]

I'm quite good at this. How do I do it? By paying attention, taking nothing for granted. My wife does a lot for me and I tell her how much it is appreciated.

[Ekvark]

Pretty successful. Just sit and listen when someone (doesn't always have to be your s. o. could be a sibling or a friend or even a stranger) has something eating away at them and they have to vent. Don't cut them off, listen. Don't give your 2 cents until they ask for it and you're sure about what you'll say. Don't tell them to do things like stop crying or don't be sad.

[Anonymous]

Why would I do that? It's been my experience that women like to keep you guessing. So if I think she needs emotional security I'm not going to provide it. Or rather I'm going to give her just enough. This is advantage I have over her and I'm going to keep it as long as I can. Why? I know she'd do it with me.

[exitseven]

I am loyal and supportive. I usually let my actions speak for me.

[bamesjond0069]

Just always be honest and keep your word. Also explain your thought process on why you do things. Be reassuring with more difficult aspects. Its hella easy in my opinion.

[DevinAM]

Based on the one relationship I've been in, I seemed to do a good job.
How: I don't know, I'm just a nice person, that wants my partner to be happy.

[emperor90]

Dont know so i can't answer have not been in a relationship

[lightbulb27]

just realize the above is #1.

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

I give as much as I take. That is all. We are each other's rock. When one needs the other is there.

[midnightmoon05]

Well said

[TsAubreyKate]

Horrible I have the emotional availablility of a wet carrot

[bean2k21]

i've never though of myelf as a emotional security

[Anonymous]

I'm an extremely rude and abusive person.

[EaterPeter]

Somewhat

[Steve1071]

None.

[jimmy2]

Very much so