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I cheated on my husband once w/our neighbor just b/c I was pissed off about his drinking. I knew our neighbor kinda liked me so one Saturday I invited him over. We did w/e and that was that. Time passed and my husband still didn't know until one day they got into an argument. It really hurt my husband's feelings and I had to explain to him why I did it.. I didn't have any feelings for the guy.. it was out of spite and anger. We are still together, but I know he will never forget.
It makes me kind of sad 😔 that people are responding so cruelly. My Fiancèe's cheated as well and we've been together 8 years. You're right about the fact that it's not something that us forgotten, but over time you learn to move on, let go and press forward.
I think more people need to be more understanding. Cheating takes many forms not just physically, someone who has a problem with porn, gives themself more self gratification than be closer and more intimate than their partner, emotional cheating, flirting, checking out other people. . .
There's a story in the Bible where a woman was brought before Jesus who'd been caught sleeping with another man besides her husband and during that time woman were stoned for this. Jesus response was to draw a line in the sand and say "Let him without sin cast the first stone. . ."
The point seems to be that nobody is in a place to judge another because none of us are perfect. So many people are quick to be self righteous when in reality everyone has made mistakes and done things that are wrong. I don't think a person needs to believe in God or the Bible to see the truth in the point behind this story.
Yeah - that is not something any man would ever forget. Unfortunately, he'll take that pain to his grave. Sorry to be brutally honest.
But like do y'all still live next to him?
Your going to hell for sure and you are possessed by demons.
Bruh 🤣🤣
@bamesjond0069 No he moved away a few years ago.
wow how the hell did you get 21 reactions?
You said you confess but do you really repented on the sin cheating on your husband? I'm am 29 years old and I know what it's right and wrong, Let's say I pull your hair I can just pretend it was all a accident I didn't mean to do it.
Damn, there's no way you respect him like he respects you. He would have left 🤣😂🤣😂 what a simp
^This is a sexist pedo. Ignore this clown.
@Mofunfour20 It's not his fault I feel sorry for the guy his wife is a whore.
@Alwayreckles93 it is his fault, he picked her. Why would I feel bad for his poor choice in women?
If you won’t do it again then don’t tell
I feel she should tell the truth.
Opinion
144Opinion
u How was it a "mistake?" Obviously, you don't want to take responsibility for what you did, but YOU did it, not someone else. You knew what you were doing, you knew it was wrong, and you did it anyway.
A mistake would be that you were asleep, some other guy crawled into your bed in the dark, and you fucked thinking it was your boyfriend. MAYBE that can qualify as a mistake. . . but I don't see what you are calling this a mistake. Obviously, you shouldn't have done it, but you did it, you intended to do it, and it's your responsibility. The first step towards becoming a better person is to assume responsibility for your actions.
Semantically, “mistake” is still appropriate to describe an action a person performs intentionally, with knowledge that the action is immoral or harmful. It expresses either regret or after the fact realization that the consequences are more severe than we originally estimated.
Examples:
It was a mistake to party instead of studying for my calculus test.
It was a mistake to only pack one pair of underwear for the jungle expedition.
I made a mistake asking the girl who had a crush on me to prom, rather than the girl I have a crush on.
Though I’m curious what else you would call it?
@zeitgeist057 In my opinion, it is a semantic attemot to divest oneself of responsibility and I will criticize it every time I hear the word used in that way.
Fair enough. We all have our own personal filters of what words mean to us, which may or may not align with dictionary definitions.
No. I have no sympathy for you and you should tell him so he can make you pack your shit and leave.
@WhatTheHeckkkk Country girls like yourself have my heart. (Speaking in a general sense)
To think people are so immature nowadays that they can’t just express their emotions with their partner
Thank you. I agree. I think if someone cannot communicate their emotions clearly with their partner, they shouldn’t be in a relationship with them, or in a relationship in general.
Exactly. There’s always a respectful way to say anything.
This is a cruel statement. He is better off not knowing, whether they stay together or break up.
My wife left me, I thought, and her friend seduced me (she was 18, and attractive). I never would have been in the situation if she had not left. My wife came back, months later found out (how, i do not know), and it was aweful. She did not leave, but she cheated.
The thing is, I always told her if she ever cheats, do not let me know. She let me know, snd she initiated it, and she publicly humiliated me with it. I forgave it, but she divorced me anyway. It broke my soul (we were married ten years, age 22-32).
I would have rather she left me without cheating, and being so public about it. The worst thing is that she claims that she never left me in the beginning (she stormed off to Australia and tried to seduce my best friend).
Cheating happens. Adults forgive and move on, but rubbing your partner’s face in it does no good
@SkipPerk
Being faithful and honest with your partner, and communicating faults is the root of the relationship. You break that, you break the entire relationship and it’s beyond repair. Sorry, it doesn’t matter if they are adults or children who cheat, what might be forgivable for you, isn’t forgivable for others.
“Cheating happens” and by forgiving, it just lets them know that you will put up with mistreatment in a relationship.
I’d have to disagree with you, and I stand by my opinion, respectfully.
@WhatTheHeckkkk Exactly. No self respecting person is going to return to a cheater
Good, one less troll on GAG, although posting as anonymous, can't really be sure you're really gone.. 🤣
How can you tell she's a troll 🪄
@Aakash_Hangargi how can't you tell? Lolol
Because i don't know her lol
@Aakash_Hangargi you haven't noticed the increase in 18-24 pink anon posts stating they cheated?
I almost think it's a guy trying to show that women will tell "her" it's okay, but it backfires because most women reply that it's not okay
I don't think i have seen much of these questions offcourse any cheater would wanna expect that
@Aakash_Hangargi well I have, same for the person that keeps creating blue/pink accounts to say most/all women are really bisexual, then deactivate, then another account pops up saying the same thing🤣🤣
Others are aware of it, not just me
There's over 100 responses; I won't read them all, but I can imagine. I saw your update, it looks like you don't really want advice or opinions, you just want to hear agreement with what you want to do. But here is my answer, either for OP, or others in a similar situation:
I won't tell you "he deserves better", but instead I will say that if you want a good relationship, it must have a foundation of trust and honesty. At this point, you can keep the 5 year relationship, and turn it into a 55 year relationship, but if you don't tell him about cheating on him, it will have a foundation of dishonesty.
You will be in a relationship with someone who doesn't know or understand you for who you are in all aspects, only the parts of you that you have decided to show, and you have decided to hide parts of yourself. It's not THAT big of a deal, many, many people have relationships that are not that intimate, where they have issues with being vulnerable, honest, or other intimacy issues. Understanding is one of the most important things for intimacy, and you can't understand without knowledge.
I would not be comfortable in this kind of relationship, and in fact I had a similar situation where I cheated on a girlfriend. I loved her and wanted to be with her, and I knew telling her would probably mean the end of us. At first, I didn't tell her, but that only lasted a few weeks. I'm a very honest and intimate person, and I didn't want to live a lie. If you are comfortable living with the lie, go for it. Just don't expect to have a genuine intimate connection with someone you are not genuine with, it's impossible by definition. My personal relationship goals are incompatible with hiding and being dishonest with my partner.
I often defend females poor life decisions. And a lot of those times I really shouldn't. You are correct when you say people make mistakes. That is 100% correct. Will you learn from this? I highly doubt it. Unfortunately I have no sympathy for you right now. I will not show you any sympathy. If you are a good person like you are implying then you need to do the right thing and tell him. It sucks for you that it throws away 5 years. Am I sorry? Nope. If you think I am mean, think about your boyfriend. You couldn't keep your legs closed so that's why your relationship ends. He did absolutely nothing and I'm sure he cared for you a lot and that's his end of that bargain. You think you feel like shit? Not even close to what you decided your relationship is worth in his eyes. I promise you that he is more fucked up in this exchange than you. I am a firm believer that cheaters need to get branded in a visible spot so the next person can at least know what your capable of. I'm sure this came off strong but I meant every word. I hope you get your shit figured out and you learn from this.
I'm not going to jump to the same predictable 'you are a piece of shit' comment, because I don't think that is necessarily true. And those speaking so negatively and asking you to leave GaG need to grow up. This site isn't always going to have questions that you like, and people aren't always going to do things that you agree with. That is life. We are all human, get over it.
But with that being said- without a doubt, cheating is wrong. You're betraying the trust between yourself and your partner. You can't just get angry and then go and fool around with someone else, that is incredibly immature and you need to learn to deal with your emotions in a sensible manner to ensure something like this doesn't happen again. If you don't trust that this will be the only time then you should break up with him because it's not fair on him or yourself.
My honest opinion is that if you're sure that this is a one off you should keep it to yourself. As I said earlier, we are all human. There is no point ruining a 5 year relationship over some thoughtless moment of stupidity, nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. But if you're going to decide to go down this route, you need to address this issue so that you know a mistake like this won't ever happen again. Cut ties with the person you did this with. And if you ever do this again, you will need to break up with him.
I respect the fact that you are seeking answers to your dilemma. You obviously have to tell him at some point as well as be honest with yourself and if the reason you cheated was a mistake or a sign of bigger issues or maybe nether. I love women and I'm a sexual person. If I was alone and sexually attracted to the person I'm with it's obviously going to lead in that direction and it has nothing to do with love just a selfish need for sexual gratification. It's normal although most won't admit it or unaware how strongly these urges can be. Some probably aren't this way but the facts are there are many who are. To avoid this you have to have enough love and respect for that love to avoid situations that put you in an environment where the chance for you to fail are high. People may not understand what it's like but it's like being starving and having your favorite meal in front of you and your not suppose to eat it. I feel as sex is an like an appetite and some of us eat more than others and like different kinds of meals. As with food over eating or not eating the right things not eating at all can effect our health. You know him and yourself better than any of us so if you think he will not be able to handle the situation right now maybe tell him later but don't be selfish about it and let him find out elsewhere and don't continue the relationship if there was more to it and you are not capable of being faithful. The key to being faithful and actually loving someone is putting the respect for them and their emotions at the same as what you expect or higher. If you don't have the will power to stop yourself don't put yourself in situations that you have already proven you can't succeed in.
I have been cheated on more than once in my current relationship and each time my Fiancèe has told me about it almost right away. I know people's feelings about cheating and nothing from my own experiences make it right, but how a couple deals with things is between that couple. On every occasion I've done my best to try to understand things from the other perspective. I try and figure out what the context of the situation was and what really happened. Finding the answers doesn't make things easier and reconciling things and moving on will always be challenging.
Keeping something like cheating to yourself may seem like the better option, so as you can learn from your experiences and move on, but then you live with the knowledge of what happened. Sometimes keeping a secret about something you've done may eventually eat you up inside. There also may come a day when your boyfriend does find out and had you told him the truth sooner perhaps he would have responded in a better fashion.
There are many harsh judgments about cheating and people are very clear on what there feelings are about it. Are all forms of cheating equal? I think a part of the problem is that no situations are the same. I hope that l whatever you decide things will work out for both you and your boyfriend. Asking this question shows that you care and you're doing your best to determine what you should do. All we can ever do is do our best.
I sometimes question that myself. We've been together 8 years and we have a 4 year old son together. We've had man ups and downs and challenges, but somehow we always get through them. One of the reasons that brought us together was learning that we both have Bi Polar.
It's at times hard to explain, but mental illnesses can cause a person to do things impulsively and out of character when put in certain situations. This is part of the reasons perhaps that I'm understanding. There's not really ever a good reason why someone cheats, but perhaps if we can understand the "why" then the entire context of the situation can be understood. That doesn't ever make it right, but does help in moving forward.
Just like how a woman wouldn’t want to be cheated on. I’m sure he wouldn’t want to be cheated on.
You’re putting him at risk of STD’s by doing so. If you try to forget about it, and move on from it , you never know if it’ll happen again.
Same goes for a cheating man.
(At my old job we had a hot Alpha-Male, a Latin Brad-Pitt… and one day came a new girl who looked like Demi Lovato to our job. She would claim she’s married and show off her marriage ring to others. But the moment she met Brad Pitt there… she kept and kept asking questions about him. It was almost like she could hide he crush on him. Soon enough she started telling everyone that he is no longer wearing the marriage ring and that her husband is too controlling. And next thing you know, everyone is talking about how her and Brad Pitt “F’ED” eachother.)
(Then the story goes that, she caught HPV from Brad Pitt and that he doesn’t want a relationship with her and that he immediately started messing around with another hottie in the job)..
(As to her husband, and kids.. well apparently the husband forgave her in consideration of the children, but nobody knows how they’re relationship was afterwards)
Dont become a blowup-doll. Tell your man the truth for the sake of his sexual health. And then let him determine if he wants to forgive or do it back to you as a way to be even.
🤦♀️
@SkipPerk Not knowing with increase the chances of STDs and Infection and ACTUALLY CAUSE HARM.
Don’t make repeat myself.
Or it’s harming one’s feelings or it’s harming someone’s health! YOU CHOSE!
Idiot”
First you need to own up that your feelings and anger don’t justify this. If you start thinking that way then you will look for more reasons including very unfair ones to get angry at your boyfriend. You will subconsciously try to justify your bs to yourself.
You can try go along like nothing happened. But your conscious will haunt you. Honestly the best thing to do is to RESPECTFULLY break up with him. You don’t have to tell him why but if he asks come clean. He will be rightfully pissed off but it will help him move on faster.
I had one ex do this to me years ago. She never confessed and I never asked. I trusted her 100% at the time. But the things she said to me afterward were absolutely horrible. She had to see me as less than human to self justify her bs. That along with other clues is how I figured out she cheated.
Do NOT do that. That’s the worst possible thing.
Anyway I don’t usually wish bad karma on her but truth is I hope her fiancé cheats on her. He’s one ugly sob so I don’t know if that’s possible for him but that would be exactly what she deserves.
Hm, you gotta let him go and tell him cheated whilst doing so. It will hurt like hell but it must be done. My reason for it is shared below.
Speaking from experience where I too came really close to cheating on my ex because I was fed up with his BS and selfishness ( he wasn't selfish when it came to sex though. ) overall. I wanted to cheat so damn bad but stopped myself because I felt like it would hurt my pride and integrity to do. As I felt ending things would simply have been and was better. Since, if I felt that angry that I wanted to hurt them like that then that means the love there is no longer present and as such so should the relationship.
It’s hard to admit to yourself that you are wrong , and you aren’t the only one , a lot of people do this and make excuses for their actions. But the sad truth is you really don’t love your boyfriend if you can cheat on him , you need to realize you deserve better than that , if you truly loved him you would t of cheated , so not only are you wasting your time , you are wasting his , If you love him like you say you do then let him go and let him find someone that wouldn’t cheat on him , By you holding on to him is a selfish move on your part. Realize you yourself you fucked up and realize you truly don’t value him
I was cheated on after being with a guy for a year. You have no idea what damage you have caused an will have caused him.
If you have any decency, you will tell him so he can move on and heal.
That is the right thing to do.
If you were happy, you wouldn't have acted on it and you wouldn't have hurt him.
Learn from it and be alone till you can commit to someone
He does deserve better. You’re incredibly selfish to have done this and to think he doesn’t deserve to know and make a decision on your relationship based on it. I’d kill to have a loving partner, you don’t know how bloody lucky you are and to throw it all away out of anger? Smh.
Yep, you can totally justify that "Honey, You made me so angry the other night I needed a whole other man just to calm me down. Or at least part of one."
That being said, there's no glue that will hold that foundation together after you cracked it. Even if he forgives, he won't trust again. He will have the moral high ground and you'll be haunted by the notion that he is in fact... better than you. All because you couldn't find the words faster than you could find a cock. It's a hard truth to swallow but you didn't seem to have that problem the other night.
Wow…This made my blood boil. I want to say so many things. So many things that would, if I’m being honest, get me labeled as a cold-blooded Psychopath. However, I’ll just say this. You made a choice. Not a mistake. A CHOICE. to cheat. There is no excuse. Not one. Tell your “partner” what you did. Why you did it. And if he’s smart, he will help you pack. Please…Learn from this…and don’t do it again. I’m not sure if YOU have ever been cheated on, but that kinda thing will have the person you cheated on question their whole identity. Their self-worth. Their self-respect. Their whole existence. And very few people deserve to feel like they weren’t good enough. And to wonder why they weren’t good enough to the point that their partner, whom they love and trust, would betray them in that way. Please learn from this.
She's useless not a wife material if you ask me.
I would say she’s inconsiderate and Selfish, But not useless.
If I punch her face I guess I can say it was all an accident.
Lmao. Those darn muscle spasms!
Lmao 😂
So instead of keeping it to yourself you feel the need to tell everyone about your mistake here? I guess that is your idea of pretending it never happened, by announcing that it did. Frankly, it sounds like you are trolling.
"I'm leaving G@G" Since you are one of the numerous pink anon 18-24 trolls I doubt you will actually be leaving.
If it was truly a mistake and you're sorry you did it, just move on. To tell him would destroy your relationship. Then again, he might find out on his own, in which case you would have to come clean about it, tell him how sorry you are and beg forgiveness.
Of course, it's your decision. A group of random strangers can give advice, but ultimately, you know yourself and your relationship.
To answer your specific question... you CANNOT PRETEND it never happened, but you can move on from it.
I said other because your lying. It wasn't a mistake, you did that shit on purpose knowing damn well what it was. So now you may truly regret it, but it was no mistake, so stop lying.
Yeah you better tell him... but you think anger justify cheating? Seriously, your not worth dating to begin with so hopefully you do the right thing and boyfriend has a set of balls and dumps your ass.
Accidents happen...
I'm guessing you and some other guy slipped over and when you fell your legs were spread and the otherguy accidentally slipped his dick in you...
The face you are asking this question and getting pissy that people are saying you boyfriend deserves better is because you were never planning to tell him and just wanted to justify it
Nailed it. She just wants validation in order to justify her behavior.
never said it was vanilla lmao anyways well said !!
true and i also hate it when people say " oh i cheated because i was drunk , i didn't knew " well if they didn't knew then its rape but cheating , but they know it was a choice
@johnyash1324 yeah, I've heard that excuse from people... it is a crap excuse
I have been cheated on. Personally I would never stay with someone who cheated on me. I don't care how sorry they are. There's no coming back from that. sorry but I have no sympathy for you. I would tell him. Maybe he's not like me and maybe he'll stay. If he hears it from someone else he's going to be way more hurt and angry then if he hears it from you. Just keep in mind. Sooner or later the truth is going to come out one way or another. It could be now it could be five years down the road but it always does. I'm just giving my complete honest opinion.
This is really silly, and immature. If you are married and have children, you would abandon your family because some young woman seduced your husband when he was drunk? No, you ask him to quit drinking. The same goes for men (I forgave my ex-wife for cheating, although she left anyway). Mistakes happen.
That said, the best way to avoid adulatory is frequent sex. If couples let this slip, bad things can happen
If it was the other way around and you were in his shoes, would you want him to be honest with you? If the answer is yes, then you should tell him. You should also ask yourself why you cheated in the first place? If you don’t address the root of the problem, you might end up cheating again.
I don’t know you so I’m not going to judge you. However, from what you have wrote it seems like you came on here for people to co-sign your decision. When that didn’t happen, you decided to leave. Maybe focus on taking accountability, that can also help in the healing process and in getting your relationship back on track. Good luck with everything!
You have to tell him the truth so he can decide whether to stay with you or not; otherwise withholding the truth (aka lying) is taking his choice away.
Think of it like this, let's say you're pregnant with his child (or maybe you two have a child already, but imagine you're pregnant again) and he secretly slipped an abortion pill into your food or drink so you miscarry with included heavy bleeding, allergic reactions, etc; yeah it's only once, but he pretends like he didn't do it. This is the level of betrayal/mistrust some men feel when they discover their girlfriend/wife of many years slept with another man while in the relationship. Yes, I understand you're not going to have sex with other guys after this, but right now you're just pretending to be a good girlfriend when you're not.
You don't want him to control your choices, why are you trying to control his?
and the worst thing is she has the audacity to tell this to the world but not her boyfriend
Male or Female, regardless, unless you have one or more of the mental illnesses listed in the DSM the guilt coming from this will eat you alive. At some point it will get sp bad the boyfriend will pick up something is wrong. I'm not saying you should apologize I am saying for the sake of your health you need to own up to your actions. If it ends the relationship so be it! How bad can this guilt get? I know a man now in his 80s that cheated on his now-deceased wife back when they were in their 20s. He never told her. To avoid writing a novel I will just say he had health issues and is still on meds. He still cries when talking about finding out about a year after she died that she knew! She made it clear to the friend she knew but had forgiven him. OP, tell the boyfriend! Then move on! If he forgives you great, if not find another guy!
It's always interesting to me how differently some women view their own cheating versus how they view it when a man cheats. They see a man cheating as selfish and unjustified, but justify their own infidelity because they have what they consider a valid reason and see it as just a mistake.
I'm going to tell you exactly what you don't want to hear. The fact you see it as an "unnecessary comment" only underscores what a shitty person you are. You absolutely should tell him, and he absolutely deserves better than you.
It's also interesting to me that women seem to think men cheat a lot more than women when statistics show women your age cheat more than men.
I think if it’s only one time thing and it’ll never happen again… just don’t say anything.. Learn from your mistake and just move on.. I don’t see why u would ruin a 5 year old relationship for a mistake. Yes it’s a terrible mistake but we’re all humans
You can TRY and pretend it didn't happen, but there is one person in the whole world that nobody can lie to, that's themselves.
Let me ask you a question. Reverse the situation. Now your boyfriend of 5 years is angry with you, he goes out and cheats on you.
a) Do you want him to tell you? If so, you would end things with him.. right?
I'm really sorry but you may not know or believe this, but your relationship with this guy of 5 years died the second you did the dirty on him!
He DOES deserve better. He deserves a mentally stable partner that doesn't chest when angry.
You not understanding that shows even further delusion.
I hope he gets fucking far away from you.
true
Yeah you can pretend all you want. I can't pretend 9/11 didn't happen or I can pretend the holocaust didn't happen...
But they did. You seem immature so let me paint you a picture. Put yourself in his shoes. He thinks everything is perfectly fine. But it's not or you wouldn't have cheated. If you dont tell him it's a lie. And if you decide to never tell him, you will be lying to him every day. If you have any decency left in you, tell him. I can assure that he will find out somehow anyway. Best that it comes from you and soon.
It's wrong and you already know it. I it's better to tell him and get it over with it. Do you really love him? Maybe he'll forgive you if he does the same. You've realised that you've made a mistake and that's all you need to tell him. It'll be worse if he comes to know about it some other way. As your partner he deserves to know about it.
I mean how would you feel if he did this to you and kept it a secret? Awful, I'm guessing but wouldn't you forgive him knowing that he's realised his mistake. You've been together for 5 years and that's long enough for people to really know each other. So I think it's best if you confess, accept what happened and then move on together.
You ended that five year relationship the minute you decided to cheat, no do the decent thing and show him a ounce of respect by telling him the truth and let him decided whether he wants to stay with someone who will undoubtedly cheat again because as the saying goes "once a cheat always a cheat"
Isn't it's better to stay player than trusting pussy s?
@Playboy2424 there is a difference between playing the field and cheating but if you ever want a lasting relationship I suggest first you realise that women are more than just a pussy.
What woman' have to offer in relationship apart from holes?
Ask your mother, grandmother, sister...
Okies you're my mother & grand mother... now tell me what girls has to offer in relationship apart from holes. ?
It's serious question
@Playboy2424 exactly the same thing we do. Sex, love, support, money, etc... Literally any proper human being bring those things to a relationship.
@Playboy2424 "other than holes" girls can offer: Quality time, understanding, listening, massage, making you laugh with her silliness, her wit, her antics and expressions. Teaching, introduce you to ideas, introduce you to others, increase your social status by telling everyone what an amazing guy you are, inspire you with her quality traits like kindness, playfulness, creativity, and spontaneity. Girls also often offer little surprise gifts that you never expected or wanted, but delight you. They can get to know you, and be supportive when you are stressed out, or encourage you when you are feeling down. There's so much more to them than holes, but they do require some reciprocal effort, so I understand your position. There are lots of low-maintenance holes which provide the benefits you seek with very little effort or ambition on your part.
Seriously, sounds boring.
Friends can give more
@Tstrbrainer The companionship and support you get from your friends is vatly different from the one you get from your partner.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 it's not for everyone, and not for every culture. I have observed from friends and statements from others within Indian culture, they tend to place a low value on respecting and nurturing women. It's normal there to assault and rape women, harass them, and also to cheat a lot. It might not be as likely for them to have what we consider a healthy heterosexual relationship. The men prefer the company of other men, and women are "just holes".
That's mostly the older and illiterate folks dude, and India is a diverse country with different cultures. And there are lots of men around me who would fall at the feet and worship a woman just to get her to like them, whatever.
Crimes you mentioned happens here, but you can't act like such crimes don't happen in your country.
And cheating is high in my state, as I've heard. But that's from women's side lol
He deserves to know that he's got a cheater as girlfriend
"most player never had good sex" lmao bruh you make me laugh 🤣🤣🤣
@Playboy2424 he means never gave good sex.
The mistake is that he still is with you. Sorry, cheating out of anger (and compounding the issue by lying to him) makes you a sucky girlfriend and just another burden on the man's back. What if you got pregnant or caught something from your illicit liaison? What would you do, abort the child, pass it off as his, or keep silent and let him be infected with your disease? If he did something like that to you, you'd be throwing fits and sounding off about what pigs men are to anyone who would listen, and of course you wouldn't trust him. This guy deserves better; and if he can't get better he should swear off women.
Girl you are a cheater of course you are going to get these “unnecessary” comments. Yes he does deserve better and there is better than you, someone who won’t cheat on their husband is better than you and ok if you dont tell him i hope he finds out another way
If you loved him, you wouldn’t have cheated.
If you love him you wouldn’t hide that kind of horrible thing.
If you were a person worth being with, you wouldn’t have done that and you wouldn’t hide it or lie about it.
If you care even slightly about him as a person, you would let him decide if you are keeping, instead of letting him think you are a better person than you are.
Cheating is NEVER a mistake. It is a choice narcissistic people make because they only care about themselves.
To pretend it never happened and move on while staying in the relationship is an incredibly selfish and-honestly evil-thing to do. To "learn from this mistake on my own" should actually mean to tell him, end the relationship, and then live with the absolute breach of love and trust that you two had, and work on becoming a better person.
Everyone makes mistakes. But that doesn't make what you did okay. You need to own up to it and tell him. It will be hard, and he may not forgive you, but you have to be honest and tell him.
There's no such thing as a "mistake" when it comes to cheating. You didn't trip and fall on his dick; you made the choice, maliciously, to cheat.
Don't compound your infidelity further, by lying about it. That would be twice that you screwed him over. He deserves to be told, and if you care about him at all, you would tell him.
If you own up to it, then he might forgive you, but if not, then learn from your decision, and don't cheat on your next boyfriend.
Your question, that picture and your update shows you are not sorry for what you did, by down playing the severity of your action, while showing arrogance. In your mind you feel you have a accomplished something by cheating. You need to realise how big of a problem you pose to people you come in contact with. You need to remain single and save your boyfriend from YOU!
I really don’t get why girls and women do this shit based off “I’m angry at my boyfriend or husband”. My boss annoys me should I tell them off because I feel like it. I have a philosophy in life, treat others the way you would want to be cheated. I’m pretty sure a girl or woman would not want to be cheated on. This is why it’s tough for me to trust y’all gals today. If you’re angry how about this…talking to him? How about going to the gym? Why does everything have to be a sexual thrill? And then I’m going to be blasted by others online for this post…go figure.
Your updates make me think you just came to hear
"oh no its okay honey. Mistakes happen. Don't tell him because we're only human. And humans aren't perfect. Anyone that tells you otherwise can suck it 💅"
Out of anger... out of anger... so you never had any other thoughts or doubts because you were angry at him. Nah, you still chose to do it and you can't "accidentally" cheat or cheat as a mistake. You make the choice to cheat.
If that's how you act when you're angry, then you need to stay single until you get that under control. You are not good for relationships until them
Sexual exclusivity and exclusive intimacy is the cornerstone of what makes a romantic bond different from all others.
You have broken that bond.
He deserves to know.
He should mobe on to another lady who is faithful.
Every second you two are together now is just a lie.
You can't pretend. If you knew that you could get away with it you wouldn't have to ask the question. Eventually your guilt will effect your behavior. there's no woman on earth that can hide her emotions forever, it she can thats a serious problem. Be honest now and your life will change for the better. Deception will only hurt you in the long run
You cheated, not out of anger, but because you wanted to do what you did with whom you did it…
And it’s pathetic of you to wanna hide it, further it likely will not be your last time… because you did not cheat because you were mad… you cheated because you wanted to. and at present are a cheater.
Behavior trends towards patterns. Your obviously not happy. Sit him down and have an honest conversation with him about what you’re feeling and if you’re aware.
Whether or not you tell him had nothing to do with you, and everything with whom’s has been violated whether or not they know it.
If there is no chance he could ever conceivably dint out, and he couldn’t benefit in any way from being told, then and only then would you not.
Bite the bullet and tell him I mean if you really loves you understand it and people do things out of anger has he cheated on you before I guess things make it different if I was the case but I would understand you want to lose your five year relationship keeping things in shit in the dark never helps. I guess all you can do is be honest cuz honestly is the main key in a relationship so even though you did what you did the wisest thing to do is come forth and be honest with them cuz sooner or later you'll find out
Many people think cheating is terrible. But truth is, typically you would only need to cheat if you're not fulfilled by your current relationship. I can say that 90% of cheaters out there are either not fulfilled or satisfied with their relationship / marriage. It does not mean these cheaters do not love their partners / spouses. If your spouse cheated, it means you weren't good enough. Its time to move on.
I disagree. If you have chronic cheating, or no sex in a relationship, then yes, but sometimes mistakes happen. Women do not realize that men are never trained to deal with female attention. For some of us, we only get it later in life (late twenties, thirties). Young. Women seducing a man is difficult to walk away from. If he is drunk, it is almost impossible. I would have never believed this until it started happening to me in my late twenties.
There are many reasons as to why people might cheat on their partners and understanding what made them do it is vital, but this attitude is extremely harmful. You're putting the blame on the person who got hurt rather than the person who did the hurtful act. "It's YOUR I did this thing that hurt you". That's gaslighting in its purest form.
@AD240pCharlie
Just because it sounds extremely hurtful , it doesn’t mean it’s not true
Over my many years of experience, I have come to find that cheating tends to only occur when someone is not entirely fulfilled by the relationship. And just because this sounds hurtful to you, it doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Love is fate. If you’re not meant to be with someone , you aren’t meant to be with someone. It’s not something you can fix. You cannot cram a square in a oval design
@AD240pCharlie
[It's YOUR I did this thing that hurt you". That's gaslighting in its purest form.]
I’m gonna say this to you again, 90% of cheating occurs when people are not happy for Watever reason. I’m it saying cheating is the right thing to do. But people cheat when they are with the wrong person who is not fulfilling them
@AD240pCharlie
I have seen men cheat on their wives over and over again. Before they ditched her to marry someone else. And then the cheating suddenly all stops. He’s not cheating anymore on his new wife. Why? Because he’s finally found someone who fulfills him!
I’ve seen this over and over again throughout my many years.
Quit blaming your cheating husband and ditch him for a man who is the right one for you. You’re dating the wrong man yet you’re complaining that he’s cheating on you. That’s nobody else’s fault but yours
@AD240pCharlie
I’ve seen many married people go online to cheat on their spouses. And guess what? 90% of them are in dysfunctional relationships ridden with problems.
Not saying cheating is the right thing to do. But happily married people would have no need to go around to cheat. Cheating is a sign someone is not fulfilled. It means they are with the wrong person
You keep talking about the "right" or "wrong" person as if it's something predetermined, which is simply not tru. That's just new age spiritual bullshit that people tell themselves to feel better. There is no "right person" for anyone, the world doesn't work like that. You have to actively MAKE someone right for you, you have to make sure that the relationship develop in the direction you feel most comfortable with yourself. No one is going to be a perfect fit, that's life.
As I said, there are plenty of reasons someone would cheat on their partner, but ultimate that's THEIR choice and their partner didn't make them do it. No one held a gun to their head and forced it to happen. It ultimately doesn't matter what your reasons were, the one who cheated is still the only one who can be blamed since they were the ones who actully did it. Holding yourself accountable for your own actions is a thing, y'know!
Now, can you point me to a scientific study to support your assertion that 90 % of cheating occurs when people are unhappy in their relationship? Because otherwise you're just making a baseless assumption.
@AD240pCharlie
Ok so there is no “right person” , so why don’t people marry their first boyfriends? Why do people date around until they find the right one to marry?
Go fuck off and stop wasting everyone else’s time by spewing out BS that makes no sense
Whatever you do - DO NOT TELL him , or admit to anything , its a case of ultimate denial , put it in your subconscious as " it didn't happen " , all you would achieve by telling him is making him angry and sad.
Just continue on with life , see it as a positive , a twinkle in your eye , just move on with life , but remember total and utter denial , it just did not happen.
Whatever you do you need to work on Your emotional response like you said to learn from it… why you did and how to handle the stress in a better way. If was alcohol involved then you don’t drink ever again.
I’d wonder if the untold would do damage over tim. Maybe it could be told slowly to limit the damage… lies cause problems. Sometimes there is no easy fix.
Tell him, because it is only a matter of time until he finds out another way, which will be worse for you.
You might get lucky and discover that your boyfriend has a cuckold fantasy.
To have sex with someone else, because you were angry with your boyfriend, shows that you have a psychological issue for which professional help may be beneficial.
At this time, you are a walking red flag.
first off, he deserves much better you. you're trash. second off, you don't deserve to be forgiven. third of all, cheating should never be an anger outlet. you screwed up.
Why do you say “better” than me as if you know for certain he can find better than me
because there are better people than you. like i said, you're trash. he deserves a real woman.
@skyeee_ i know right? such a sad, broken ego.
well look at it this way, what if he did this to you and you found out a month from now and he didn't tell you? put yourself in his shoes. i think you should tell him and be honest and face whatever happens.
You seriously need to tell him so as he has the opportunity of dumping your cheating fucking ass.
I hate when people say “he deserves better” as if there is better than me just based on this one mistake?
There are millions of women better than you without the mistake, now you're even further down the list
Being drunk is not an excuse. Alcohol only loosens up your inhibitions to do what you really wanted to do and that was have sex with somebody else.
Tell him as he will eventually find out. Then the choice is his. Maybe he should have sex with your sister or best friend and then call it even. How would you feel then?
you will always know, and some day some how he will probably find out, so you should talk to him about it.
No clue what the results will be, but my guess is that if you tell him know it will be better when he finds out later.
either way you need to be prepared for the results, good or bad.
Should have thought of that before deciding to cheat on him. I think he should know and he should leave you. Once a cheater, always a cheater. You deserve no sympathy.
Have you never made a mistake? You really think people should be damned for a mistake they regret, and may never do again? Please read some the honest opinions to this post, where people cheated and stayed together. That "Once a cheater always a cheater" is bullshit.
You think keeping this secret won’t hinder or put a wedge in your relationship? He won’t pick up on something? You can just hide yourself in the confines of emotional vulnerability with no consequences? He won’t become suspicious when you’re all of a sudden distant or defensive or moody because of the burden? You’re naive if you think so. If you don’t tell him, it will be a long drawn out painful death of the relationship. Don’t be such a slut and grow up.
That’s so unfair on him, you betrayed his trust. You have to tell him and see what he says but honestly he should break up with you. Cheating is not ok.
How was it a mistake if you got angry and chose to cheat?
Get an std test ASAP. I’m not saying this to be malicious, I’m saying it for the health of you and your boyfriend.
It’s so important to do a test each and every time that you have a new sexual partner (I’m saying this to everyone who reads this), and is not only important only for those who strayed. I hope you get it done, for your peace of mind also.
I've been cheated on multiple times. It's never a mistake, it is a conscious decision. I know few couples who actually work things out after cheating, but things will never be the same. In my experience though, once a cheater, always a cheater. There's never an excuse to cheat.
You are incorrect. I have been cheated on only twice, to my knowledge, and I would have rather not known. The first was a girlfriend in college whom I was not attracted to, but she chased me down, and was a good girlfriend. We were young and both cheated, but she really did it to humiliate me (ugly, short guys publicly).
The second was my wife, and I was devastated, but I would have rather stayed married. I do not cheat, but I can forgive.
Furthermore, some people do drink too much, and many men surprisingly become attractive to women as they age. They do not know how to handle aggressive young women. We are not trained for it. An accident can happen.
I would advise wives to sleep with their husbands every day so they are not temped. This works. When men go a long time (say a week of more), it is really hard to resist. Women do not understand the literal pressure in the prostrate.
I am not saying that there are not slimeball guys out there, but good people make mistakes. If you love someone, you can forgive. It is horrible, but you can forgive.
Also, women need better friends. So many of my ex-wife’s friends tried to seduce me. Luckily my wife and I had a healthy sex life. Her so-called best friend tried to seduce me while staying in our home. It was gross. I never told my ex wife because I knew she would not believe it, or blame me, but her friend literally did the walk out of the bathroom naked trick, and she tried to get in the shower with me (she touched my manhood, it was disgusting).
@SkipPerk I will agree to disagree. Cheating is a choice, not a mistake. There's no excuse. I do agree women need better friends though.
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