I don't believe in a "league" take a look and see if you think I am entitled to be able to offer this as constructive advice but I have dated guys based off their personality. For me a man can be stunning because if his eyes or a smile. In the end looks fade so I find internal beauty. I am the sort of girl who gets a lot of attention but the types of men who confidently approach me usually get told to politely do one :)
I don't know if it's personality, eyes, or what, but when girls are around me in person when I'm in my element, they tend to like me a lot. But I haven't been able to do that since college ended, so I'm not sure how to do it again. I don't seem to be able to get my personality across by approaching strangers in that limited amount of time.
Online how? Because I've been on dating apps for years and they suck for guys. They are great for girls I guess. But guys deal with lots of catfishing, ghosting, spam accounts, flaky girls, girls who just want confidence boosts, and a host of other problems. I also got 3 stalkers from dating apps...
He was a bit of a cynic by the time we met online… thought I was fake, etc and only time meant he could trust me for who I am. He hasn’t regretted a thing so far and neither do I. We were on pof x
I don't blame him on the lack of trust thing. I don't trust girls after what's happened to me. Ah, I have heard the dating apps that cost money do work. I suppose I could try one
Something's missing in the eyes. The one in the blue t shirt too. Don't mess with her. The red head seems very white girlish (and I mean that in the nicest way). Honestly the first black girl seems really nice. I like her. And the frizzy blond with the blue eyes seems sweet. Septum girl may be better as a friend.
Interesting thoughts. I'll keep that all in mind. I either dated or went out with all of them, but the last one was 3 years ago before my dry spell that I'm trying to end. Some of them I'm friends with, and some I never talk to or see, so it's not really a problem. Sounds like I might've made some of them seem better in my head than they actually were 🤷♂️
Apparently. Basically, I like a lot of attractive girls I come across, but I never talk to them if they seem like I don't have a chance and try to go for ones I feel are more my speed. But maybe I should stop that? Maybe I should just talk to anyone I find interesting regardless of whether I think I have a chance
I just got so many rejections in a row over the past 3 years that it doesn't seem like I'll ever get a yes again, which is exhausting thinking about all that effort and nothing coming of it
IRL is the way to go. Preferably where you can see them in situations where their character is put to the test. Jepeing theor word, integrity truthfulness. Aa that. Thanks for the MHO!
Agreed! I just have no way to be in those situations anymore! It was easy in hogh school and easier in college and clubs. Now, I don't know. Suggestions?
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Yes, but ultimately all of them will have their own insecurities so leagues aren't always what matter. I don't buy into the height nonsense either unless you're severely short (4 ft).
You mentioned hairline recession. Just a headsup I had some thinning hair and it started to grow back after I began using ozonated olive oil as a moisturizer for the scalp after hair washes. Pretty much accidentally discovered it could do this, not sure if everyone would have the same outcome, but it makes sense.
Ozonated olive oil is so saturated with ozone / oxygen that it turns from brown to a thick clear oil and it can retain this oxygen content for over 10 years. The oil applied to the scalp at night would have provided more oxygen to the scalp and hair follicles causing the thinning hair to grow back. After this discovery, I started using ozonated shampoo too. Note that some people have gotten rid of skin cancer by using that oil with proof as well.
I'm 5'8", so not that short. I'm much taller and larger (because of working out) than most girls. But so many girls only want 5'10" and above even if they are only 5'3" for some reason lol In any case, I actually have had a lot of girls my height or taller into me, so that's cool I guess.
Never heard of ozonated olive oil. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to look into. Weird how more people don't talk about if it works 🤔 Is it a new thing?
I have a feeling that those height requirements are more online. When a guy has naturally built attraction with a woman in real life and he's a little taller than her, I don't think she will care. The women attracted to me are either roughly the same height or shorter, less are taller.
I also workout, it definitely makes a big difference all round. I do friction training (girls look at me funny when I mention that).
Ozonated olive oil is a general purpose oil that has been used for all kinds of ailments. Few people have heard of it. It can take months to make and is a fire hazard for the person making it. I only discovered the oil after using hydrogen peroxide to get rid of a respiratory infection so started doing general research into oxygen therapies.
Someone here has a different theory as to why they think it will help hair grow. Totally different to mine:
The only issue is they don't sell the brand of oil that worked for me. The only one they sell in USA is PurO3 Ozonated Olive Oil. I found that to be too strong, but it might still work for hair growth.
Yeah, there are some silly expectations online from guys and girls, which is why I prefer meeting people in person. I feel like they give me a fairer shot and I they.
Interesting. Well, my beard is inhumanly thick, so I don't need any oil for it 😂 I'll just research and see about the head cuz it'd be nice to not worry so much about sun burn.
It also makes for the best toothpaste and beats all of the junk out there as well. A lot of dental issues vanish when oxygen is present. There are specific ozonated dental products... no one's heard of them but nothing else even comes close.
I'd say in about 5 months, my thinning hair will be back. It's already barely noticeable. The beard stuff was just an example of it growing hair. Most that lose hair have no issues with beard so it must be different things at play going on.
A friend of mine had a bald spot at the front that it slowly helped grow back. I think it will depend on the cause and the person definitely worth a try. I'd try for a few months at least and see what happens.
Number one don’t just go for looks. Most people can look good by putting effort into themselves.
Always go for women out of your league. Will you get rejected? Yeah. But if a woman is out of your league and she chooses you. Then you know she genuinely wants you and isn’t settling for you.
Now. Genuine love has no leagues. If you genuinely like a girl who sone see is below you. Nothing is wrong with that.
But. I won’t ever waste my time on pathetic bitches. NOT EVER…. It’s better to be alone then with that.
I mean if she has all these options and chooses you. You know it’s genuine
I wouldn't say any of them are out of your league. They all look like average pretty girls. But honestly when it comes to "leagues" there's more to them than just looks. I mean you look like a pretty attractive guy if that's what you are worried about. I'd give you a chance! Maybe your confidence is holding you back? Rejections suck and definitely hurt your confidence. But you can't give up you just gotta keep asking. Maybe try for girls that aren't necessarily your type and give them a chance. They might surprise you.
So, I've given girls not my type a chance, and that has had mixed results. Got 3 stalkers by doing that 😅 Also got some new friends, which was cool
There is definitely more than looks! I choose girls mostly on values and personality actually, which is why I was wondering if thwse girls weren't actually that attractive and I was blinded by how I thought they had good personalities. My ex liked me mostly for my intelligence and personality, which was great. But I haven't had any success in 3 years, so I was wondering if 3 years of rejections with no success has just destroyed my confidence or if it's something else
Oh! Well, lol maybe you weren't noticing the red flags? You could possibly be going for girls that aren't good for you.
I totally respect you and agree with you on that! Personality and values is soo much more than looks. I mean, I'm bisexual so I can def tell you that you haven't gone for bad looking girls. I'm personally very attracted to 1, 5 and 8. But having rejections constantly over 3 years can break somebody's confidence for sure. Focus on the good parts of you and work on the parts that make you insecure that will help your confidence.
You could be right because I just got played by a girl I was taljing to for months. She lied to me about not wanting a boyfriend and it's messed with my head ever since. But I really don't know why I'm going for girls like that. Surely there's somewhere to find good ones.
I think the main trouble with the confidence issue is that I literally can't work on the main think messing with my confidence because it's my receding hairline. I can't fix it. I'm working on fixing all the things I can fix, but it seems like I'm doomed to fail since I can't fix that one thing. If I could, I totally would.
I'm sorry, been there and it sucks. Sometimes you don't notice the red flags right away. Take your previous experiences and what you've noticed as lessons and what to avoid in the future. I don't really think there is like a "one and only" place. You can find girls anywhere and everywhere. I met an ex of three years at the grocery store.
I can totally understand that ruining your confidence. To me that isn't a big issue and I would look right past that. You just have to remind yourself that every female is into different things. Just like some guys like bigger girls and some like smaller/thin girls. There are girls out there who could care less about that. So focus on and flaunt your features you're more confident about to boost your confidence
It seems silly, but I guess I'll have to just talk to every girl I meet while shopping, at book stores, etc. Sounds tiring but seems like only option really
I went out with or dated each of them. But I've had quite a dry spell lately, so I'm trying to figure out why.
I suppose you have a point about posting their photos 🤔 Hadn't thought about it since my own photo is on here. Their photos are on social media like everyone else's though, so does it really matter? I figured it was pretty safe since no one knows my name or theirs.
Well you have to keep dating and see what develops out of it. Have good morals and values and the ones that don't have good morals or values rule them out. The ones that you don't have the same standards rule them out. For the sake of both of you.
Save sex until marriage. When one wants sex figure she is just using you for sex. If a woman feels entitled to a free date... Rule her out.
Personally I don't know any of them they might be all great women. Pray about it. I don't think there really are leagues. People who say that... Don't worry about it many times they are jealous of you
I haven't even been able ti get dates with girls I actually like in 3 years--that's the problem. So I was trying to see if the girls above that I have gone out with aren't as great as I thought they were.
If leagues don't exist, you'd think I'd have girls throwing themselves at me constantly lol But I only get certain kinds of girls doing that. I'm having trouble finding the right kind to even ask out in the first place.
Is it dangerous to post the pics? I figured it was fine since these are all pics they sent me themselves or posted so millions could see 🤷♂️ What's a few more?
Exactly! The girls throwing themselves at me only want sex or money or a therapist, and that's bad news. I could handle mentally and financially stable girls throwing themselves at me because they love my art or something like that though 😂
But realistically, I'm not sure why it's so hard to just meet a few to go out with and see who is most compatible.
Yea... That sucks. I can be someone's therapist but yea... Someone just using me for money or sex not ok.
I don't date for money though. But yea mentally stable. I mean if she had depression or something tha would be fine. Being a little out there maybe a bit nutty or being a bit weird depending on what kind of weird she is is fine.
But I can't handle psychotics or absolute but jobs. Since I am a little nutty though.
Yea... It is like so many both men and women wished people would throw themselves at them... But trust me only people who don't have that stuff happen on a regular basis say that stuff XD
I don't know. Find good women. Have moral standards and date them and see what happens. You have dated all those women and they are some GOOD looking women I mean beautiful. But what really counts is what is on the inside
No, they weren't all bad. A few moved away for college and didn't want long distance. One couldnt deal with religious differences. Another was actually dating another dude when I went out with her the first time, so I stopped that immediately because I'm going to be apart of someone cheating. Stuff like that.
I'm trying to find the lifetime kind. Tired of the short blips. Or at least some sort of long ones until I find the lifetime one to at least teach me a few more lessons so I'm ready
If I could get a date I would. That's what I'm saying is the problem. I only get offers from girls I don't like, and keep getting "nos" from girls I do like, or they aren't single. Not sure how to fix that aside from just asking literally every girl I come across and like even a little bit
You just gotta keep asking or give one of the ones you don't like a chance. I mean you don't have to say yes by any means. But a date is just a date if you went to get coffee or something
I do the ones I don't like chances, so at lesst there's that. Do you mean keep asling the same girl or just keep asling new ones? I've been told by some people that I give up too soon, which seems silly. If she tells me know once, why bother asking again? She'd say yes if she were interested.
I am pretty good at letting rejection go by this point, but that's not my issue. My issue is that I have gotten nothing but rejected for 3 years straight. If I could get some yeses in between I woukdnt be so exhausted. Just feels like a waste of time right now
I get that but you have to either keep trying or whatever it is. Or like you said see if maybe you date more of the ones you don't really like at first if it grows
If you mean the one with heterochromia, she's actually the oldest of them all and was in my grade in high school. She's always had a bit of a baby face. The other are all 1-3 years younger than me.
Well, one is actually Dominican and Chinese... But anyway, these are girls I've gone out with or dated. I'm trying to see if something happened to me since then to make me seem like a loser to girls like this. Am I allowed to like multiple ethnicities? lmao
I'm a psychologist... so I know more about IQ measures and demographics than you do in all likelihood, but thanks for the heads up I guess? lol
I am curious why you care about intelligence though. Isn't it more important to find someone I ger along with and is physically in good health and shape, so our kids will be above average?
You might not know this, but since I'm a highly intelligent guy, I'm more intelligent than at least 95% or more of all people based on my tests. So there's no point in me trying to find a super smart girl 😂 If I tried to find a girl around my intelligence, odds are she's Chinese or Indian and probably would hate me because I'm white and American.
Interesting answer. That is me in my profile. I'm actually exactly 5'8" so does that change things? I also have some hairline recession, which I thought might affect things. It's not a horshoe, but still noticeable like Shawn and Aaron Ashmore's. I built a good physique to try to compensate and just be healthy in general.
I'm also curious which ones you'd say are below me in case I was just lacking confidence and settled.
If the shinobi part of your name is a Naruto reference, right on man. I started it last year, and I'm in Shippuden where they are trying to save Gaara from the Akatsuki.
no. 5'8" is on the short side but not short enough for most to complain about. im 5'5" and if it wasn't for my popularity and personality im sure i would have had dating problems. i started having hairline issues when i was maybe 19 or 20. i just started shaving my head and i think i got better reactions from girls than when i had long hair. you have a handsome face. im not into beards but trimmed nice with a shaved head and good physique youd probably be a 7 or 8 outta 10. go slay my young friend.
Yeah, mine started going at 19 too. I'll likely have to shave it in a couple years, but for now my hair lady says a good fade works fine.
Really? I figured shaving your head only works after age 30. Before then, I figured I'd lose any chance with girls in their 20s that are around my age.
It's possible I need to get better at broadcasting my personality. I'll work on it!
Weird response lol Why do you say that she'd be more than happy? Also, there is one girl who is Dominican and Chinese, so I'm not sure if you mean her or the other dark skinned girl, and you couldn't tell them apart... which is a bit concerning.
Then I'm not sure how I pulled it off with her lol I dated or went out with all of these girls. Met during a school competition. I've had a 3 year dry spell. Is the problem that I don't have any way for girls to see me competitive in anything?
Lol thanks. We basically just couldn't reconcile that she wanted to raise all her kids catholic (including infant baptism that I'm entirely against), while I wanted to give them a bit more intellectual freedom. Too bad too since those would've been some pro athlete kids probably 😂
Haha nice. Honestly, in the cases I've seen I think it's because people tend to give them whatever they want and don't call them on their more negative behaviors, so they go through an unchecked form of life. Whereas the rest of us are forced to behave ourselves for the most part.
Yeah lmao I kinda assumed people would get that these girls liked me and they're not random chicks I'm creeping on 😂
Unless his point is that the way to be in their league is to think I am. That seems like poppycock. I don't think Danny Devito could ever will himself into being a good match for Alexandra Daddario.
I don't think any of them are currently available. I just asked because they are all girls I dated or went out woth in the past, but I haven't had any success with girls like that in 3 years for some reason. It's very possible my confidence is a big issue, but I don't know how to fix that. The easiest fix would be for a girl I like to give me signals, but that hasn't happened. And the last girl I talked to screwed me over a month ago, so I'm not in the confident mood sadly.
All are 20 or older. You really think they look that young? All of them or just a couple? I guess since I know them, I don't see it. They're all my age and are all girls I went out with or was friends with in college is why I was wondering.
It does matter because these are all girls I've gone out with or dated. I haven't had any success with girls like this since I started losing my hair, so I'm not sure if that's the reason or not
Well thanks. I'm trying to figure out why I've had a 3 year dry spell where I can't seem to get a date with anyone I like who also likes me. The girls I like are taken or ignore me, so I'll try giving girls I don't like a chance, but I can't force myself to like them so nothing happens.
Well I went out with or dated all of them is why I wondered. I haven't had any luck with girls like this in 3 years, and I'm trying to figure out why. Is it just harder afyer college? Is it my receding hairline? Something else?
receding hairline definitely plays a big part... I know it happened with other people.. And also yeah it gets kinda slower after college.. College years are the best for dating.. But also maybe because you think a lot about the things that need work, your confidence and charm dropped a little but I feel you I'm over here freaking about my mature hairline since I've turned 23 lol
I started losing mine at 19... wish it was just a mature hairline. Pretty sure washing less often or using olive oil wouldn't help either. I just get as good of haircuts as I can.
Well I kinda blew it in college. I tried, but just rejection after rejection, and occasionally I'd go out with a girl one or two times before finding out some big red flag about her. Seems way harder than it should be
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