I found out that a guy who flirted with me had a girlfriend all along wtf?

[Anonymous]

I met a guy at a workplace and he proposed to hang out saying he was really excited. No big deal, we met up for coffee a few times but then he went ballistic and started to gaslight me about how I was “hurtful” to him e. g. by my texts and not replying to him right away. I would not even talk to him that often or want his attention so I thought it was unfair for him to do that. Then we deleted each other off social media being unable to stay connected after that. A few months later I got news that he was official with another girl. I thought it was very strange he would meet someone to be official with them within a short time period. I actually think he was on a break with this girl when he had met me hence why he was acting childish like that. Wtf? It’s a good thing I never did anything with him but it still feels like a waste of time getting to know him.

[spartan55]

Uh, you find out upfront if someone is taken... that's entry level due diligence.

[Asker]

Umm no it was not possible to find out back then.

[spartan55]

It's always possible. Stop with the bullshit

[spartan55]

How was it 'impossible'?

[Asker]

Do you really think I would be interested in taken men? Or you just want to argue?

[spartan55]

Just explain to me how it was impossible. Not saying you would be interested in taken men. I'm saying you didn't even ask and it bit ya.

[Asker]

Well he obviously was not actively seeing her at the time. Would explain why he said he wanted to go to Europe together and sent me romantic videos. I’m sure even if I explicitly asked him he would deny it. Anyway my family didn’t like him anyway so it’s for the best's

[Asker]

He was also very depressed at the time we spoke, so it was hard to imagine he was in a committed relationship. He would visit his cousins every weekend but that seems to be it. Maybe he actually found her last min and became official because he’s lonely? Really don’t know and don’t talk to him so it’s shady

[spartan55]

He very well would have lied about it. But it's pretty easy to figure out if someone is being upfront. You always at least ask though. He sounds like a shithead for plenty of other reasons too.

[KrakenAttackin]

What are you whining about, this is modern dating.

[Asker]

It might be, but he could have been more honest about his situation rather than acting like I’m at fault.

[Anonymous]

Be grateful you found out now, and not down the road.

[Asker]

I know I think the situation would have been more draining than now. Probably would have tried use me for sex or something

[Opinion Owner]

Correct.

[Smashingdoozy]

You should tell her 😊

[Asker]

You know I thought about that, but then it’s going to look like I’m still not over him and jealous of their relationship

[Smashingdoozy]

Nah she deserves to know

[Asker]

Lemme see because I deleted every part of him in my life including our messages.