Im so lonely, depressed and anxious I just wanna cry. I probably will never find someone. Is that true😭?

Question

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

Unfortunately, failure and rejection is just part of the dating process. I will say don't get deterred and never give up. I think rejection is easier for men because we have had to deal with it 10 times as much. I mean its as simple as just saying hi to a women and having her totally divert her eyes and want past, us like we are invisible. Holding a door for her and she doesn't make eye contact or say thanks. These are types of rejections. If we allow ourselves to fixate on these things it can become overwhelming. But for men 9 out every 10 women we come into contact with probably reject us on some level. Be here we are on a daily bases out there trying to meet women.

So no you never should give up or let your failures define you as a person or generate basis toward others. Seriously look at me, I been online dating sites off on for over two years. I have been on 16 different dates with 12 different women... and have had one 4 month and 8 month relationships that didn't work out. But I have had to message well over a 100 different women. I have been snap at, degraded and insulted by a few, but most just never just read the message, block and ignore me. So out of 12 different women I have been rejected 95% of the time in one way or another. And honestly for most men on dating sites, I would be consider pretty successful at it.

You have to be persistent, you can lose hope, give up or be deterred. You just have to understand that you will be met with rejection and failure 9 times out of every 10 attempts in dating and relationships. In 90% of those cases you can believe it has everything to do with them and nothing to do with you. Be if you allow it to get you down you can never get up again.

You have to be willing to step back and do some real soul searching, by being as objective as possible about the things you could do better, or differently that will allow you to become the best version of yourself possible. At the same time you need to set bounties and expectations for yourself and others. But be realistic about that, be willing to try new things and give people you may not of considered a second look. They might surprise you, sometimes we get so close to our own problems that we over look the solution that is right in front of our own faces. We all have this believe in the things that we want in a relationship in terms of out come and results from others, but what is that we really need and properly should expect from them. Are investing on the same level as they are, what is their expectations on out comes and does that align with yours? Relationships are transactional, and at times we places value on the things we want and lose focus on the things that really need. So if fixate on the wants, we deappreciate the value of the these we need. Do we truly appreciate the things others do for us, or do we tend to fixate on what they don't. Because into the end we will never get everything we want, but what is it that we really need them to do for us that we can't or should be already doing for ourselves.

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

Paula love stop it you're in the same boat that you were last year the year before I can feel you from here like I've always said I still think you should DM me so I can talk to you about this you have everything right in front of you you just go about getting it the wrong way I think believe me there's somebody out there for you you're so caught up in a bunch of other stuff you just need to get caught up in you

I've tried to help you on and off for the last past 3 years on at least when I've seen you on

Ok I understand you don't want to DM me and that's all good but if that's the case I hope you get this message the moment that I send it because I'm going to say go back to my last past five questions that I've answered they all have the same message in it you need to listen to that message because that's what you need to do everybody on this planet needs to do it is a matter of fact or try to at least so I don't know when you're going to read this so now I'm going to answer more questions so I hope you start from your question and go back five more questions anything after your question I don't know what it's going to be about but if you do that I think it will help you

RosieMelts · Accepted Answer

You’re one of a kind sis..

(This may sound) weird maybe, but I’m reading an ‘amateur comic,’ and I never related to a character so much. Their romance and what brought them together was their *sorrow.* They were misunderstood by the community that was supposed to be understanding…

Fate had brought them together, and I know it’s not real, but it gives me hope that yeah, I could find someone who understands me. Someone who would be willing to open up about his past or problems and fears and want to feel safe in his lady’s loving arms.

I just know there’s someone out there for you sis, and if you want (excuse me) just the sex or the touch I guess, you can get that at any time, in all the right places.

If you want someone to appreciate you for you and see you, and want to know you and be by you, I know that it is no unfair request, and you’re deserving, and there is more than one male out there under those likings.

Just be patient with yourself. Understand everyone has experienced ‘loneliness’ at a time and wanted to be understood.

I promise you’ll make it through to riches if you just hold on.

Find peace in other things. Give your love to your hobbies, so you don’t feel so empty <: )

Im sorry if this is all mumbled, or far from perfect speech. It may not be what you wanted to read or needed at this time, but yes,

I do think there is someone out there for you. 🫂💕✨

meetkitty123 · Accepted Answer

Mindset is everything. Negative thinking will only leave to negative reactions behavior and body language. People are very keen on body language so if you come off negatively people will avoid you. For a better chance of being noticed and is coming off warm and welcoming and approachable you have to paste smile on your face even if you're faking It. Some days it's difficult when you're feeling down I definitely know but it's always best to remind yourself to smile keep your head held high and make eye contact.

A friendly disposition will get you noticed and be patient relationships are serious matters but we can't approach them with a serious body language. so it's best to relax make yourself approachable (smile) and have fun meeting people is supposed to be fun remember that if you go at it so seriously you're just going to run yourself down. Breathe smile laugh and remember to take time to enjoy life. there's always something to be thankful for

Relax be patient you have time.

Pinay_ako · Answer

Girl, you’re only 23. Don’t despair. There’s so much life ahead of you. Don’t settle for less for the sake of having a partner! But learn to open your heart and mind more than your eyes. Looks can be deceiving. Live and learn 💕 and don’t cry 😭. Hugs 🤗 baby girl

Aerolyn · Answer

If you go on living believing that you won't even find anyone then the chances of that actually being the case increases exponentially.

It's called a self fulfilling prophecy if I'm not mistaken.

Keep believing that's your fate and it will be.

You're young, there's hope, you just need to get yourself together and build yourself into better mental shape.

Because as it seems, with the way you are now, I feel like chances are even if you find someone it wouldn't last due to you being depressed.

I say from experience that people will indeed leave you if you stay down and don't get better.

Fireguy17 · Answer

In all honesty not in the condition you are in.
Many people don't wnat to be with someone that they can sense have somethings to work on.
Try to get yourself in a better place, and happier with yourself and you will be amazed that you will no longer be lonly.
Possibly see a doctor about your depression.
Try not to put so much pressure on yourself about being single.
Use that time to be with family & friends and get out and enjoy life.
You may even meet someone, but you need to start by breaking the cycle that you are in and kind of force yourself to make some small changes at first.
After time you may find it easier to be in a happy place.

RavVid · Answer

I think some people are just more particular. I've known guys and gals who break up and within a week have a new one. Other guys and gals take a long time between partners.

The media bombards me with images of beautiful women so I have developed unreasonable expectations. I sort of think that has happened to most of us. Developing reasonable expectations is probably the first step to 'finding' someone.

melanieeeB · Answer

With that attitude? Yes... sorry. I would suggest to stop putting so much woth into being in a relationship (at the end, you might end up in a toxic or abusive one..), focus on you and being happy and doing what makes you happy and spending time with loved ones and one day love will find you.

Havthrills · Answer

That's absolutely not true. You will find someone. Maybe not on here. Lol. Sometimes it takes a bit. Sometimes it happens unexpectedly. I felt like that for a while. Turned to sexting and masturbating a bunch. Then added exercising. It was to the point where I couldn't watch a show cause it was lonely. Smoked a little more some days, didn't smoke others. There is someone out there for you. The time will come.

Dennisnky · Answer

I have had lots of friends who felt this way in their 20s, and then they find a wonderful guy. If you are meeting new people, and developing friendships, and doing activities you love, there will very likely be someone who comes along. If you are out in a rural area and never meet anyone, then you should find a way to start making more friends and having a chance to meet more people even if you just spend a weekend in a city once a month.

LoverBigBear · Answer

I'm truly sorry to know this,. if i knew in life I'll definitely sit next to you. Hear you cry, will give you a big teddy bear hugs. It okay to feel like this,. happens for reason, there will be something way better. Learn from it, talk to yourself, take it easy,. from this point must move forward. I know won't be easy, i could tell you this, that a new experience, & near future, something ever goes wrong again or different. Hey don't let it get to you. Bc of experience you gone before. You will handle it better this time. I believe you will move on,. be stronger,. take it as a motivated. Take care

Rei02 · Answer

I have those feelings right now, I recently "break up" with someone and just for a stupid thing. But maybe there is a reason.

Yeah, I know and understand the feeling that there won't be anyone else in the world for us, but this feeling is only a phase. The most important thing for us is to refind and cherish ourselves, looking how to improve ourselves and step out temporarily from the date game.

menina · Answer

I'm so sorry to hear this. Perhaps you should see a therapist.

Of course, you'll find love. You're young, there are so many people out there looking for their special someone. Just be open, patient and trust yourself.

Trust me, you have way more chances of finding someone than I do.

mobiusforniner · Answer

Honey, you're 23. I thought the same thing. Crying about it won't fix it. You have to DO something. For starters, get active, be passionate about something you enjoy. The more diverse interests, the more you expand your perspective. And in the process you'll find people will want to learn more about you and the rest comes naturally.

Jeansnowstarkbastard · Answer

Truth be told you really have nothing to worry about.
At the moment i haven't had a girlfriend in about 6 years.
Not a single one.
I haven't given up hope yet. You shouldn't either.
Just because things are a little rough right now does not mean you will never find someone.

jshm2 · Answer

Yes it's true.

But that doesn't mean you need to be lonely, depressed and anxious like your average American.

Get out there into some hobbies and interests. Work in charities and try help people. You'll find more people will try help you in return.

ConspiracyTheorist · Answer

Don't be to sad and don't ever settle for something other then what you are looking for because I myself am having the same issues and I am learning that true people are hard to come by but that may also be because of the type of people I go around which are more of like into drugs and the wrong side of the law type of folks.
I don't know the case in your situation but just pay attention to people and the fake ones will reveal themselves because they're actions won't match they're words.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

You're only 23!! I didn't have anyone `til I was 25!! I haven't HAD anyone in the past 27 years!!! You've got the bonus of being a girl!! You'll get someone before too long!! Guys are ALWAYS looking for girls!! It's girls that are hardly ever looking for guys!!

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I believe there is someone for anyone out there and sorry about your depression I know how it feels I've suffered from depression since age 21 and have been forced to go on disability income I've remembered you on here for years ago we can't ever give up.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Uncertain, it depends on lots of things, like what you are looking for and how common that is, and even the unlikely happens.

I'm older than you and very picky, yet I'm still determined to find a match even though the type of woman I want is very rare.

addie14 · Answer

Girl you are 23 don't rush anything because you want to be with the right guy. You will find the perfect man for you at some point. Love is hard but everyone has someone out their for them.

Th3ft · Answer

You are too sweet to not find someone some day! I’m sure you will! Perhaps you are just looking in the wrong places? Or perhaps you need to switch up where you are going and hanging out?

dragoblack · Answer

Statistically you are more likely to find someone romantically. Men on the other hand are not. I'm 30 and never had a girlfriend and struggle to find mutual attraction let alone any women interested in me that isn't a bot, scammer, or solicitator. I feel your pain, i do, i deal with the byproduct as depression & loneliness. It is hard to manage it and the best thing is to distract yourself with activities & hobbies you enjoy.

Paul09 · Answer

If that's what you want. Do you approach men? You have to make moves too. And that will higher your chances. Get out there into the world. Join clubs, classes, courses. Goto events , parties etc. Just talk to people and try making a connection. And I know from experience. I had felt this way too. I just learned to be more happy with myself. Have more fun. And not worry about it. If I find someone or someone finds , great! If not, it's ok too, as long as I do what makes me happy.

MAssAffecting777 · Answer

No! There is someone out there for everyone!

HighValue · Answer

If you are attractive and are a good moral person with an acceptable past, at your age it should be very easy to find a good mate if you tried.

MCheetah · Answer

You're 23 and female. You'll be fine. Just stop having such super-high standards, if you do have them.

LindsayR07 · Answer

You'll find someone, but you have to be ready for them, and the have to be ready for you. The best relationships happen when you stop looking... The worst ones come when you look too hard

more_than_a_guy · Answer

What makes you think that? Your behaviour with men? Rejections? Etc... Also, you are still young, so keep calm and keep trying.

CubaPirate · Answer

Nah be more confident in yourself. The love of your life is out there you just need to find them

katiesmuff · Answer

Keep that attitude and you are probably correct!

Sour-rose · Answer

idaknow. The future is a weird mofo to live, but makes life more fun

Distorted · Answer

I feel the same. You can add me if you want to be friends

Emilyis · Answer

YES it's true, I'm sure that's what you are wanting to hear.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

Not with that attitude. You never want to let yourself get to that point. Do something that you would enjoy. Get help/counseling. Do what you need to do to make sure your head space is clear.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

You have legions of men who would happy to be with you, start with your friend zone and other men you have curbed.

VanguardTitan · Answer

Honestly that's so relatable, I'm sorry I don't have any advise like the others cause I'm in the same spot as you. All I can say I feel your pain and i empathise with you.

exitseven · Answer

Be positive and be the best version of your self You will find someone

Anonymous · Answer

Well, that's the time we live in. Women don't want men, and men don't want women unless it's for sex.

Anonymous · Answer

It's not true. Socialize a lot, you'll find someone who loves you in a way you want to be loved

Jerkallot · Answer

Never down yourself u got some one out there that goin to be all for be patient

Zolly99999 · Answer

Not true. . I sure you will find someone. What are you expectations and standards for a guy? That might be a problem

nickaboy · Answer

You're a woman. There is allways some one that wants to talk to you or more. Try being a man for a while then you will understand loneliness for real

24jack · Answer

Nope , girls always have a chance , start by acting confident and stop seeking acceptance from others, then whatever your interests you'll get someone

zagor · Answer

You don't help the situation by being depressed and anxious. Desperation is not attractive.

Vegasrunner · Answer

Can you describe the type of person you are seeking?

Emanon25 · Answer

No it’s not true, I am sorry to hear that, you can follow me and be friends.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

It's certainly a possibility. I'm not going to lie to you. It's rough out there.

Reddy4it · Answer

Not true…but some things on your must-have list might have to change

Anonymous · Answer

I feel the same like i might not find a nice girlfriend to love and be loved back. People like you and me ought to get together.

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Lonely, depressed and anxious seems to be big trend nowadays yawn...

TacticalLizard · Answer

Yeah it’s True Only because you believe it. But hey You know what they say about Belief.

Dacatme · Answer

The harder you try , the faster you settle , the heavier the disappointment. Real finds you when you least expect it.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Of course you will until then just lean on your gag family if your lonely hit me up and we can chat

B4852 · Answer

Sorry to hear that you are feeling depressed But don't worry, you'll find someone.

BLP11520 · Answer

No, don't give up!! Some dry spells are very hard I know.

Anonymous · Answer

Not with that attitude. And even if you don't, there's been greater tragedies in life.

Anonymous · Answer

I think if you had someone to talk to on a regular basis you’d feel better.

kareka · Answer

Nooo it isn't... Why are you lonely? Do you have problems in communication or in trusting people?

Anonymous · Answer

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, or else nothing will ever change.

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

It’s like art, it takes time. Give it that

Sonorous · Answer

Possibly. But not likely.

Sandeeppingping · Answer

That is correct I'm sorry my friend

Im so lonely, depressed and anxious I just wanna cry. I probably will never find someone. Is that true😭?

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What Girls & Guys Said

I am miserable and lonely in life. I have no one, anyone else feel that way?

Im so lonely, depressed and anxious I just wanna cry. I probably will never find someone. Is that true😭?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

I am miserable and lonely in life. I have no one, anyone else feel that way?

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