Why should a high value man choose you?

[Chthou95]

Why should a man (in the top 20%) that has a lot of options and the kind of man women want to be with choose you out of the bunch?

[kylee2437]

Most guys that are in the 20% don’t even choose the best looking and personality females out there. Most of them choose themselves because they are too overly obsessed with attention and their looks to ever put anyone above themselves

[Chthou95]

You don't know what a high value man is then. Because a high value with options will choose the best of the litter. Not any leftovers. And of course that's the assumption women will make about a man that has the option to choose who gets to date him and get a ring on the finger

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 everyone’s definition of a high value man is different. A high valued man can literally be an average guy that’s a family man to a woman. A guy that is considered top 20 is not of value to a woman that is looking for commitment because most guys in the top 20% are too obsessed with themselves to commit. Look at Tom Brady. He chose his football status over his wife and family.

[Chthou95]

Disagree it's pretty objective. You can tell the difference between high value men and low value men. An average man will never be a high value men. He has to be a lot more than average to compete especially in today's dating market. And again assumptions about high value men aren't surprising. And are you really going to bring up Tom brady again? We already debated on this and you lost

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 how did I lose regarding tom brady? Lmfao he’s in a divorce battle. And again there’s no such thing as one definition to a “valuable man”. Your definition of a valuable man is a man that is most likely too obsessed with himself to even put value into love.

[Chthou95]

I told you that a high value man was chasing his goals and wanted to compete still and if he can do so, he can. His wife didn't like that? Cry me a river too bad. You wanted to date a high value knowing what youd be marrying. Always remember sweet heart. A high value man makes the rules in the relationship not the woman. She follows and abides.

[Chthou95]

High value men do exist. Women of course are going to deny it but theyll chase the high value men because women want the best of the best. Women dont want low value men. As a man you have to compete and out compete the other men to get to the top. Women want winners, not losers.

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 so that just proved my point because just because he is high value in certain aspects, doesn’t mean he is high value in love. He chose himself over love and now he’s ending up being by himself on top of missing out on major aspects of his kids life due to putting himself before love again. And wow, I can see you don’t mind abusive and controlling relationships. You also don’t mind men like Jefferey Epstein that used his “high value” to manipulate young girls onto his island. 😬 think before you speak

[Chthou95]

You're using feelings and will tell me that im being emtional because i believe a man should chase his goals in life even when married. If a man is capable of still completing at a high level then why not? He still gete to see his kids and there's an off-season. The wife didn't like that (typical) and she left. But she knew what she was getting into

[Chthou95]

And where the fuck does Jeffrey Epstein come into this? You're going off the rail now 😂

[kylee2437]

I’m using feelings or am I using logic? Lol just because a guy is valuable with career, doesn’t mean he is valuable for a relationship.

[kylee2437]

You said “a high value man makes the rules in the relationship, not the woman” so you obviously don’t care about men that abuse women and also men that use their power and “high value” to manipulate and abuse women/young girls

[Chthou95]

No you're using feelings here. "He chose himself over love" "And wow i can see you don't mind controlling and abusive relationships". That's emtional talk. And then you throw Jeffrey Epstein in there lmao

[kylee2437]

It’s a fact that he chose himself over love. He has enough money to pass down to his kids and him and his wife have been dueling over this for some time. There’s no reason for him to play other than the fact that he put himself first before love. Hey there’s no issues with putting yourself first, but that would mean your sacrifice is love especially when a woman that you have been married to and have kids with is demanding more time with you.

[Chthou95]

A high value making the rules doesn't mean he's abusive. He leads but also makes the rulea on how things will be. You interpret that as leading to abuse or controlling. It's not.

[kylee2437]

Yes however that is fueling abusive relationships to be acceptable because you think high value only means career and looks when a high value man is different depending on a woman.

[Chthou95]

You're using feelings here. I get it you're a woman you're thinking from the woman's perspective but a man can chase his goals and still love his wife and kids

[kylee2437]

@chthou85 insinuating I’m using feelings and not even trying to process what I am saying is actually gaslighting and sexist.

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 who ever said a man can’t chase his goals and love his family? Lol my father does it everyday. My father is not in the top 20% however.

[Chthou95]

I did process it but i dont agree with it.

[kylee2437]

And you are a sexist gaslighter that is trying to devalue what I am saying simply because I am a woman.

[Chthou95]

No but again you're using feelings here. Nothing i said id sexist. Men and women are different and see things differently through different lens

[kylee2437]

You saying I am using feelings over and over again is you being a sexist gaslighter. It has nothing to do with seeing things differently, it has to do with you thinking you are more intellect , not surprising coming from a guy that thinks guys of high value are the ones that should only call the shots in the relationship.

[Chthou95]

You are because all yout arguments are based around family and neglecting. Not once did i say that a man shouldn't have to be there for his wife or kids. He should but can still pursue his goals.

[kylee2437]

No my argument is most guys in the 20% value are non commitable therefore hold no value in relationships. They are eye candy and nothing more. Me being emotional would be me trying to explain why I’m worthy enough to have one of those men. If a high valuable woman can’t keep them around, neither can I. It’s realistic

[Chthou95]

That's an assumption once again. you're saying that there aren't any high value men that are married and have wife and kids that have been togethger for a long time under his leadership and rules

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 I think you missed where I said “most” we are talking about 20% so that’s not including guys with good average jobs that have a family and kids, we are talking about the top 20% here. If a good looking person is not humble enough to realize in reality they don’t have many options even if they visibly do have options , they will surely be not willing to commit

[Chthou95]

Those men are much older. The times were different. Most men today can't be average. Men have to be higher than normal. And again don't go using exceptions or what you've seen. Those are exceptions. But most men need to be higher than average. Most men today are invisible. Women are only pursuing the top 20% of men. And that's fine. But men have to compete and be much more than average. Average is not going to cut it

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 actually men in this day and age are even less valuable than they once were since women can now survive without them.

[Chthou95]

Exactly so now men have to a lot harder to get into that top 20%. Thank you for actually proving my point even further. High value men are valuable amongst the average man and women value there kind of men and will not settle for less

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 your definition of high value is one that least likely to be committable so in reality he is not of high value, he is of high value to himself

[Chthou95]

Okay in GENERAL a high value man is what I've already said makes him high valuable. I have to use that word because people like to always use exceptions or themselves and what they've seen. Generalities>exceptions

[kylee2437]

And the point being is a general high value man is less committable from the very beginning since he thinks he has a lot of options. Humbled people know that love is rare and in reality they don’t have much options even if they have people chasing after them left and right. It’s simple

[Chthou95]

If that's the case then why do so many women chase these kind of men & want relationships if they already know in general what kind of man these men are?

[kylee2437]

Because not every woman values love. That’s what I’ve been saying from the very beginning.

[Chthou95]

If a woman is chasing a high vakue man, she's not looking to just get dicked down. She wants more than that. Or if she's been hooking up for a while she's eventually going to want commitment from him

[kylee2437]

Or she’s chasing him because of his value and status which simply eliminates the idea of love. You a person that wants love over those things will not chase someone simply because of the status and money.

[kylee2437]

A person*

[Chthou95]

Most women aren't chasing high value for just money and status. They want marriage and children with these men

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 they want kids with those men simply because of status and money, not because of love

[Chthou95]

That's fine. Love between two people is a contract anyway. You love under conditions. No such thing as unconditional love

[kylee2437]

@chtou95 yes because unconditional love is potentially accepting abuse and cheating as love. It’s okay to have conditional love.

[Chthou95]

You keep on associating high value men with abuse.

[kylee2437]

Yes because high value men tend to be the abusive ones that think their value gives them the power to do whatever they want

[kylee2437]

And saying “there’s no such thing as i
Unconditional love” is very emotional for you to say when logical people know that conditional love is absolutely okay because it means you have boundaries and respect for yourself

[Chthou95]

There's no such thing as unconditional love between two people that meet. There will always be conditions for it to work. That doesn't make me emotional for saying that. You're reaching now. And of course high value men are abusive to you. What else is new

[kylee2437]

Because you said it in a stance that conditional love is problematic , when it’s actually not. And I actually said that high value men have the ability to be more abusive because they have other aspects that will keep a woman around instead of leaving

[Chthou95]

I never said its problematic but that it simply doesn't exist between two random people that date. There will always be conditions. That's reality

[kylee2437]

Oh wow we agreed upon something, shocking

[Chthou95]

If that's what you want to believe then by all means tell yourself that

[kylee2437]

Whatever you are implying there 🥴

[Chthou95]

Im agreeing to disagree at this point. This conversation has went on for a while. Two brick walls trying to break eachother but no breakthrough

[kylee2437]

You are the one that continued it from last night lol it’s an issue of you wanting the last word

[Chthou95]

Let's end it. I stand by my beliefs and you stand by yours and that's not going to change

[kylee2437]

Or you can stand by not replying back and just accepting things for what it is? Lol no one told you to continue this from over 10 hours ago, you chose that for yourself

[chicosuave]

geeses you sure love drama huh lol. i stand by the guy. he has more common sense.

[Chthou95]

@chicosuave She can believe what she wants. I tried lol

[kylee2437]

@chicosuave not surprising a guy is going to stand behind another guy 🥴

[Chthou95]

Because men see things differently Kylee. Men and women aren't the same

[XHopelessRomanticX]

Can you elaborate on what a high value man is? Top 20% of what?

[kylee2437]

The most attractive men in regards to looks and career aka men that aren’t even committable in most circumstances

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Yet women chase them because they're the men they want to settle down with

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 no they chase them because they think it’s an accomplishment to take those men out of being a player when in reality they just run into a bunch of problems such as abuse, cheating , lack of attention etc

[XHopelessRomanticX]

Ok, I think I understand. I guess my next question is why should I choose the high value man?

[kylee2437]

@XHopelessRomanticX now you are getting it. He doesn’t understand that in a woman’s eyes , a high value man is not one definition because I don’t consider a non committable guy with a good career and good looks high value.

[Chthou95]

If you chasing the high value man, why wouldn't you want him?

[kylee2437]

Who says I chase high valuable men? Lmao if Rihanna couldn’t even keep Chris Brown, what makes high value men appealing to me relationship wise?

[kylee2437]

I should say your definition of a high valuable man, because there’s no such thing as one definition for high value. In my eyes, a high valuable man is one that can love me long term and raise a family with me

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 That's what you want. And you can deny it and deny it but deep down that's what you really want. You don't want less. You want to date up. Women want to date up. Not down

[kylee2437]

Why are you trying to tell me what I want? Because you telling me what I want is the only way you are willing to debate lmao. Loser

[kylee2437]

Winning this debate*

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 There is a definitive version. Its not subjective. If it was then every man out there would be a high value which we already know most men aren't

[kylee2437]

If there was such thing as one definition, then we would all value the same thing in relationships lmao I sure as hell don’t value an abuse man just because he’s rich.

[XHopelessRomanticX]

Is it wrong for a woman to want a man of quality? A good father would want the best for his daughter, so why is it bad for the daughter to want the same thing for herself?
But I am a woman of quality too, though I may not be on the same level as him. I'd rather be the one being chased rather than the one doing the chasing. But if he is too high and mighty to see the beauty of someone who is lowly and humble, then I don't want him.

[kylee2437]

@XHopelessRomanticX he can’t accept the guy that there’s women out there that don’t put importance on status and best looking.

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Most women do. People aren't as unique or different as they think they are. Most women want the same things similar if not exactly identical. But no one is unque in there choices of pursuing

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 how can you say that about women when you literally said a few minutes ago that men and women do not think the same

[kylee2437]

You trying to speak for women after just saying men and women do not think a like is pretty ironic

[Chthou95]

And i dont go based on exceptions here. Only generalities. Because generalities are the norm. Not the outliers

[kylee2437]

Trying to be a voice for women after saying men and women do not think alike is absolutely a loss for you.

[Chthou95]

No it's not. You're encouraged to actually chase high tier men and that's fine. But most men are indivisible and have to compete to get to the top. Men have to build their value to be seen as someone women want. Men must create their value. Women must protect their value

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Yes men and women think differently. Both genders are different but there's generalities among both sexes

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 my guy, you said men and women don’t think a like, so how you even remotely understand / process what I want in a guy? Lmao you can’t, we aren’t the same gender.

[kylee2437]

Remember when I said, think before you speak?

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Because of the generalities and observations sweet heart. Scientists have never been to the planet Venus yet they observed and studied and know that the surface temperature is over 400° without having stepped foot

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 wow so you have observed every woman in the world and know what all of them want? Wow you must be a magician

[kylee2437]

You just compared 3.8 million different women to one planet. Interesting.

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Similar but not identical. I repeat similar but not identical. Meaning there's still a lot of similarities women want and chase after thus making it a generality. No one is unique here

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 having similarities doesn’t mean women don’t value different things in relationships. A guy that has a well paid job doesn’t necessarily make him a provider meanwhile a guy with an average job can give the clothes off his back to provide for his family

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 They value similar things. It will not be clear cut indentical but it still follows a certain pattern. There is no uniqueness as much as people like to claim there is

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 so then you just proved my point that there’s no such thing as one definition to a high valued man because surface level values are not deep seeded values that make relationships work automatically

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 I already said in the other comment section that there's a general view of high value men. In GENERAL

[kylee2437]

The bottom line is if someone thinks they have a ton of options when it comes to love, they are most likely a non- committable person

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 That's what you think sweet heart. But the actions of women say otherwise

[kylee2437]

If a woman can choose a man that cheats over and over again because he has money and status, then she does not value love, she thinks she does though

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Thats on her then.

[kylee2437]

So that’s my point. Not every woman values the same things

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 You do. Again i don't know why people think they're unique or the exception. Generalities wouldn't exist if there weren't any similarities or patterns

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 no we don’t lol if a woman values a poly relationship and I don’t, that clearly makes us different. If a woman values money over love, that clearly makes us different. If a woman values a man that’s a stay at home dad, clearly we are different. If a woman values a man that is a criminal , clearly we are different. If a woman values a man that doesn’t want kids , clearly we have different.

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 In general again most women want a relationship and marriage. That's the rule. Most women aren't goldiggers. They're hypergamous to an extent but most don't get into a relationship just for money. That's the norm meaning most women follow this path

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 that doesn’t mean that women don’t hold other values with wanting a relationship. We all have different standards and values within that point and that was my main point.

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Those are rare. Again im going based on general insight. Not exceptions or rare occurrences. No exceptions here

[kylee2437]

@Chthou95 no they aren’t rare lol you just don’t want to admit that women have different things in what they value when it comes to relationships

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 They are. Most women aren't goldiggers. Most women are chasing and pursuing the same things they want in a man. Generalities>exceptions. You're viewing it through the woman's lens thinking there's something unique about everyone. If every woman is so different why do most women find 80% of men unattractive? Why do expressions like "know how to treat a woman exist" if all are so different

[kylee2437]

Where did I say most women are gold diggers? I’m simply saying that you can’t compare two girls and say they have all similarities with their value in a relationship. In one or more categories, they are going to have differences on what they value.

[kylee2437]

Who says I can’t get into a relationship with a guy I don’t think is the bestest looking ever, but still fits my values

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Exactly. You have to base it on certain patterns that happen a lot and are common. That's a generality. And i asked why should a high value man that has options choose you? Youd be competing against other women for him

[kylee2437]

No it’s because most men that are of high value don’t like committing because of their endless options

[kylee2437]

If you think you have endless options when it comes to love, you are definitely a person that doesn’t value love or commitment

[kylee2437]

If you can’t understand the basis of what I am saying, then you just won’t get it. Love is not a thing where you have multiple options to choose from

[Chthou95]

@kylee2437 Okay 👌

[Guy13]

It is good to be selective but so full of oneself that thry can be smelled gets one crazy or well hidden gold diggers who knows how to manipulate a man.

[CateM]

Because they can. I also know that I am amazing and high value just the way I am

[Chthou95]

Really?

[CateM]

Yes.

[chicosuave]

the world doesn't evolve around you.

[CateM]

@chicosuave I know

[AsaKyo]

I mean, I wouldn't choose me if I were them, so

[chicosuave]

haha love this question.