What should I do if my boyfriend hits the wall and blames it on me?

[DiNoOoOo]

So for the sake of privacy we’ll call my boyfriend C. So me and C were arguing again I’ve the phone and I was so upset that I had enough and hung up on him he was at the gym and he punched the wall with his bare hand and hurt himself and the next day at school his friends asked him about it and he looked at me and I’d get nervous and he’d say “yeah, you know what you did” and would laugh. Should I get out? I’m scared for my own safety my friends say that it was a bad sign that he got violent over something stupid and she said “it’s always gonna be the wall until it becomes you.” Should I leave him?

Updates

1 y

*over the phone

[Summeroflove]

That’s toxic behavior. If you don’t want to be with someone who acts this way. Get out of it. That’s all I know what to say.

It’s definitely not your fault. Honestly. If long time down the road. If you married him. Would you want him tearing your walls up and blaming you?

[Tyrael]

Hitting inanimate objects is actually a pretty healthy expression of anger or frustration. What you should be concerned about is why you're arguing with each other and try deal with the root of the problem.

[DiNoOoOo]

he was mad because i jokingly made fun of a country song and he compared me to his Toxic Ex's saying that i was "Acting like them" that "I was just like them." and that "i was probably cheating on him with a boy that i made friends with when i used to live in hawaii which isn't the case (i live in oregon so what would be the point of it?) that was the root of the problem. i got upset and said that i was done and needed him to stop yelling at me and hung up on him. im not worried about the wall's feelings after being hit.. im concerned for my safety not the damn wall. i dont want our relationship to grow into something where im being physically and emotionally abused. im asking if this is a red flag not if it's healthy.

[DiNoOoOo]

and on a side note: what do you think would happen if i did something worse than hanging up on him and were arguing in person? What do you think would happen if he got even angrier with me. What if he gets violent with me like he did towards the wall? Violence should not be the answer to your frustrations.

[Razp_Sorbet]

You leave him. Men who can't control their anger have no right being in relationships. It's only a matter of time before it's something other than a wall.

[worldscolide]

That behavior is very troubling. It's abusive. And it will turn into him hitting you.