Recently I was dating someone for a couple months, had seen each other every week and spoke consistently for the entire time. She said she was impressed by me 7 my direction, she was attracted to me, she felt 100% like herself around me, she made efforts check in & see me, was affectionate with me etc. We matched values and future outlook. She did have a previous ex that she ended badly with and wasn't great. I had told her that I'd really enjoyed spending time with her/wanted to keep seeing her (I had to go away for a week) hopefully she felt similar, she reciprocated exactly what I said.
3 days later I got a message, it was a complete backflip on what she said and said "she hadn't developed probably as far as she should have by now" but she really enjoyed my company/great guy. Didn't know how to respond so I just respectfully said thanks for your honesty, respect where you're at because we got along great. It left off well and I decided to just give her some space for a few weeks because it was extremely random, after I properly thought about it I felt she was worth the effort to reach out.
So I genuinely reached out, just said it caught me off guard but am respectful of her so genuinely wanted to see what she thinks, given how well things were going, her values/outlook on life are similar to mine that's why I am reaching out and just to open the door to continuing to getting to know each other in future, no pressure as wasn't sure if I created that or she wasn't ready, if she's not into it that's completely fine. I felt it was worth the chance as I am honest & would rather do that than play a game. She appreciated what I said she just had to be true to herself.
So apart from being utterly confused as she wasn't seeing anyone else I guess like I wear my heart on my sleeve and am probably more of sensitive type of guy. Maybe girls/she would think I am weak for handling it how I did or is it a good way to be? Maybe it's that side of me that's not attractive?
What Girls Said
The fact that you were together practically 24/7 and then you left for one week gave her the time needed to think about the entire situation.
I have the feeling that she felt smothered by you and that she could not really be herself, despite the fact that she said otherwise.
This one week away was the test of time and she realized that she was not ready for a long term relationship. I don't believe that it has anything to do with your looks, height or other features of yours.
Also, the fact that you gave in by giving her time off leads me to believe that she saw you as a person that is not ready to fight for her. I personally think that you did the right thing by not insisting but other people see it differently.
If your relationship failed after one week's separation, you are perhaps lucky that you did not pursue this relationship for years because you, as a sensitive person, would probably have been devastated.
It is best to let her go and focus on other things in the meantime. Good luck.
Yes, that was an awkward way of dealing with it.
Can I ask why that is in your opinion? The reasoning behind when I reached out was probably half closure for myself given how random the change was but also given how well it was going and things she'd said I at least wanted her to know what I thought of her and sort of just let her know my door would be open as I thought she was worth the effort I guess, I really had no expectation that it would change anything