How can I reject a guy without sounding racist?

[Anonymous]

My problem is English is not my first language, I am from Europe and since I have settled in USA, some of the black guys around me is trying to flirt with me or simply asking me out but my type is white guys and whenever I reject them, they say I am racist or get aggressive and blah blah. I don't know if it's with my language bc I just say ‘thank you but I don't want it, I really am sorry.’ That's what I am saying I'm not sure if it sounds awkward in English speaking countries but it's a polite way of rejecting in my country. So how can I reject them without sounding racist and I also want to know why they approach me more when there are more more beautiful American girls than me, around me?

[DermalPunch]

They approach you because you are attractive, are different (men like variety) and since you are foreign they may feel they can get over on you. Black people have a bit of an inferiority complex and plenty of unresolved trauma from systemic racism and social marginalization. You guys do racism a bit differently in Europe so you may not get it. Anyway you go find the white boy of your dreams. Just ignore them. I'm black and I used to ignore black guys I wasn't interested in all the time. And men of other races. I must be a super racist.

[Asker]

Thanks for the comment

[RavVid]

Last question first. Novelty has it's appeal. Simple as that.

Good you reject politely. What we sexually prefer is what we prefer and I think you are entitled to your preference. They might be trying to guilt you into dating them and it won't matter how polite you are.

The 'I don't want it' is a bit off and maybe a bit blunt in that equates to 'I don't want you'. You could say 'but I am not dating' or 'i am focusing on my studies' or any number of things which are not directly a rejection of them personally.

I think though It will be easier to just invent a boyfriend back in your own country that you have no intention of cheating on. No one can criticize female fidelity and it will avoid the racist crap.

[Asker]

Thank you this helped me a lot

[RavVid]

Glad to oblige.

[razelove]

I wouldn't worry about it. Horny guys will try about anything to get in a pretty woman's pants, more so if she's vulnerable, which ESL fits into that niche for many. Just reject firmly when you don't want to sleep with someone, if they want to make an issue about it, avoid them, because no means no. Sexual preference isn't racism, I don't think black, Asian, or latina women that prefer not to sleep with white men, namely me, are racist, they just have their preference. Generally I prefer other white women myself, my wife was an anomaly that snuck up on me lol

[SamA_nold]

"Thank you, but I am not interested."

People will be upset, no one likes being rejected, but if they start demanding to know why or getting angry or threatening, they are the ones being rude, not you.

[CALIGVLA]

Tell them you're lesbian. Some of my female friends pull that trick on guys like that and it works as far as I could see. Many black guys have extremely fragile egos and get angry at women for saying no to them.

[Asker]

It's a good trick thank you

[Jdjfjcjj]

Uh fuck politeness. Just say no and who cares about their feelings. fucken girls are stupid sometimes.

Now if you sleeping with them discreetly but would never want to be seen with a black dude, I maybe but they still getting booty so they should stop playing the victim and man the fuck up

[Asker]

They even get aggressive even when I'm polite.

[Anonymous]

You don't need to give a reason to reject someone, and if they come at you with that "racist" BS, just walk away. You don't owe them an explanation, and you have the right to not want to date black or green or whoever.

[Asker]

You are right but as a woman I am scared when a guys gets aggressive with me and I want to comfort him to avoid the any harm.

[Opinion Owner]

I don't know. I understand women have this issue, but I've never understood why some guys can't take no for an answer.

[DermalPunch]

oooh little green men.

[Kyle_Larkin_98]

I can only tell you what NOT to say... what definitely NOT to say...

[Asker]

I think I know what not to say but I'm not intentioned to say it anyway

[Kyle_Larkin_98]

I was teasing... 😉

[In_Trance]

You tell him thank you but I'm not interested and make no mention of race