Is a relationship easier to find nowadays due to dating apps?

[Anonymous]

I hear people saying everyone’s taken or why is everyone in relationships but in reality most of those who don’t meet through work or school is through online. And more and more people are becoming socially awkward or hermits not even going outside to buy groceries and getting take out everyday.

Are relationships easier to find nowadays since you can be indoors all day and still meet 10 people online through an app? Whereas before you had to go outside to meet those people and interact in person and spend an entire day and probably not get a single number?

how is it possible that people are becoming less social but most are in relationships?

Yes it’s easier to find people to date than before AND build a long term relationship

It’s easier to find people to date BUT harder to build something long term

No it’s harder to find people to date AND harder to build a long term relationship

[Cynicaldreamer]

HAHA! Oh, you're being serious?

No, it's just as bad on dating apps, if not worse! Now I will say dating apps do help those of us that are socially awkward or introverted find relationships since it's easier for us to chat online than in person in most cases. Plus, for people that live in small towns or areas like myself where dating is... impossible, yes, dating apps can be a godsend.

However... that's just the good. Unfortunately the bad usually outweighs the good in most cases. It's harder to find good, REAL people online. With dating sites now people use filters, fake pictures or profiles (catfishes) so you don't who you're getting until/if you meet them in person. And even then, people can put on a charade online to fool you or say what you want them to say, then be a completely different person once you meet them or really get to know them.

In addition, and this isn't dating sites, but people in general: people set such unrealistic standards for potential partners. They want a model, intelligent, with a good job, low sex count, yet plenty of sexual experience, and has time for them, while having an active life and plenty of hobbies too! Hmm.

And even if you check ALL of that by some miracle... you're still not good enough for some people, LOL.

... and don't get me started on how people use dating apps to ghost you instead of taking accountability and saying, "I'm not into you." Unlike in person, it's a lot harder to do that with someone you see regularly. Whereas now with online dating, there's no repercussions for negative behavior.

I could keep going- from people lying about what they're looking for on dating sites, communication issues, but y'all get the point. However, am I completely against dating apps? No. As in the past, it's been the only way for me to meet anyone, friends or relationships. It just takes LOTS of patience and an open mind to deal with dating apps nowadays... and be aware of the cons.

I think we as people make relationships and dating convoluted no matter what: dating apps or in person.

[Orion76]

You said it all, I’m with you the small town and social skills that’s all me plus a single dad. Yeah a lot of guys are optimistic and seeking this innocent fairy tale girl Snow White, scratch that she shared a room with 7 dudes lol. Nothing weird happened though some guys might let it slide.

[Rosexøxø]

It gets you conversational with more people at “reasonably” faster rates because in-person conversations are sometimes lengthy and also take time to end the discussion and say farewell, while online can be summed up and closed in just a few sentences, or words, even.

For that reason- yes, dating is easier.

The selection and “dating pool” is widened/broadened, but a lot of people, by default, intentionally and unintentionally take ideas/ideals/ and people online for granted. 🤷‍♀️

It’s easy to be borderline and outright disrespectful and just as dismissive.

Dismissing things we don’t agree with saves time, but taking the time to go out of our way to disrespect others online? Not he best and will not promise a relationship at the end of the day. Especially not a healthy one.

Online widens our selection, but it doesn’t promise the best and it doesn’t guarantee what we want out of it/from it.

Relationships and life/sex partners require something only in-person interactions offer.

Living together/ hanging out together/ being affectionate with each other/ etc.

What’s that vibe like in person?

Regardless of online or not- it’s pretty important that couples or potential couples see and weigh how the other person lives/ copes with issues/ what they believe in/ how they come to confusions/ make decisions/ and what they prefer. It seems like a lot maybe, but they should at the very least be considered so that this stuff doesn’t come back to bite us in the butt later on- and not in the good sense either.

[Rosexøxø]

It’s only good if they know who they are talking to in an honest way- which can sometimes only be proven in person, and if they can afford to move together or live close to each other.

Online isn’t worth it in the sense it forces a person to move in with another in order to hang out- but they may not be worth the big leap or the added expenses. That’s why it’s easier to date casually and locally, so that they can properly decide for themselves if that person should be moved from: short-term to long-term.

Does online dating help? Even in the worst ways it does. It helps us learn some serious truths. It’s helpful but NO

IT IS NOT EASIER TO FIND A RELATIONSHIP ONLINE.

If anything they could almost be 50/50 in their ranges of difficulty and number of roadblocks 🤷‍♀️

[Rosexøxø]

Voted second option. Thanks for that 💯🙌✨

[TheIrishWolf]

I really don't know. But I think these dating apps are terrible for a few reasons:

1. Woman get too many matches and men get too little.

Woman are sick of the bombardments and probably by the same repetitive shit. Men are starved and get very few (if any), matches and spam swipe to "hust find someone". They need to severely limit men's yes swipes to combat these issues and produce scarcity for women for them to have motivation.

2. Incorrect similar attraction Level.

Women think they're 10s, even though they're 6s. Because of this, they're missing out on potential opportunities of people on their level. They're going for the ones that are perceived as the highest value by their looks (naturally), and are going for them. Which creates imbalence.

3. Misunderstandings when talking.
You might say something that comes of as weird or cringe, but you didn't mean it, and you might get ignored because of soemthing you might have laughed off in person.

4. Profile photos.

You're profile photos might not reflect the person's looks in real life — good or bad. I think I look better in real life than I do in my photos, or it can be the other way around for some.

Ultimately, they're completely imbalanced. Women pick and choose and men take what they can get. And women can't find the guy they want, and men can't find the women they want. But mostly, men feel invalidated somewhat. So I deleted the app.

[FireGodGoesSeeknFire]

Its vastly easier for the top 10% of men. The change cannot be overstated. Its like the introduction of magic into the world and a select few are sorcerers.

Its moderately harder for the middle 80% of men with the median man hit hardest.

Bottom 10% of men were loss-limited at next to zero prospects which they still have.


For the upper 25% of women its probably a boon. Its trivially easy for them to have sex with a reallu hot guy. Before that took a certain kind of assertiveness that was popularly known "throwing herself" and was judged by other women.

For the second 25% of women its almost certainly worse. They can get mediocre sex on demand but its way to easy to interpret a top 10% guys mild interest in sex as mild interest in dating. There was no narrative in our world before about men having a take-or-leave attitude about fucking an objectively attractive young womsn who is obviously interested. But, thats not at all uncommon among top 10% guys now.

As a result I think there is sort of doom spiral among these women as they go back and forth between false hope with top guy and mediocre almost cynical sex with just above average guys.


I really have no sense outside of these groups.

[Avicenna]

Not relationships. But it sure is easier to get a fling or hookup.

[Asker]

Well I would argue that if it’s easier to find hook ups it’s easier to find relationships. If it’s easier to meet friends, it’s easier to meet partners. If it’s easier to meet strangers, it’s easier to meet acquaintances, etc

[Avicenna]

Except that is belied by all evidence. I see a big difference from what it was like when I was a young adult and you had to actually approach and talk to women (which was not hard) rather than swiping right.

[Asker]

You can still do that plus there’s more options through apps and online channels so if anything it’s the same but more likely even Easier than when you were young

[Avicenna]

So you say. But, for whatever the reason (s), that isn't the case in reality. Part of it has to do with who's on these apps in the first place.

[Cathy7734]

I think it's easier for men to have a fling or hookup because there are escort sites they can go to. It's harder for both men and women to get into authentic relationships because most people are toxic these days. Before, people weren't as toxic.

[Avicenna]

@Cathy7734: The real problem is that dating apps give you the illusion of choice that really isn't there, so people flake, ghost or just give up easily thinking they';; try it with the other dozens of people they've matched with.

[Cathy7734]

I liked what you wrote, "dating apps give you the illusion of choice that really isn't there." But don't you think that women actually do have a lot of choices? Or were you talking about men?

[Avicenna]

@Cathy7734: It's true for both, really. Sure, women get much larger numbers of men contacting them/swiping right on their profile, but that doesn't mean the women consider most of them dateable and men are also led to believe that there are tons of women out there when a lot of the profiles are fake and there just are a lot of women you can tell you don't want to date just from their profile. If a woman isn't dateable, does she really count as an option?

Another thing I've noticed is that a lot of women try to date too many guys at once (unless you believe they're just totally disorganized, which I don't find believable) and you forget about them until they contact you again. The smart ones will focus on one guy at a time. But you still often just end up with flings with them.

[coachTanthony]

If you invest in a good profile, photos and have some patience and common sense sure. Most people don't though.

[Cathy7734]

A lot of people are complaining that dating apps are useless for men. That's because it's 8:1 for men to women. On Tinder, it's 9:1 for men to women. So no matter how good a man's profile is, no matter how great his pictures are, it's still 9:1 on Tinder.

If a guy spends $$ on advanced features - if he spends $$ for a dating coach and the coach gives him great line openers and tips, it's still 9:1 for men to women on Tinder.

Regardless, it's almost impossible, even for the top 20% of men. Get off those BS dating apps!

[anon1903]

Not to mention their faulty bios.

"I'm Tom and I'm 6"7" like lol ok.
"I'm Tom and I'm CEO and I don't tolerate mind games so ladies you better behave yourself or tata bye" 🙄
"I'm Tom, my best friend is my dog, I'm lonely, I like to camp out" (the hobby part was good ngl)
"I'm Tom! If you can't meet me in person, you're a loser"
"I'm Tom. I'm a real man. Please no Feminists or single moms. Yuck"

[Shiningtempest]

@Cathy7734 Dating apps aren't BS. Any person who thinks dating apps are BS are sadly mistaken.

[anon1903]

They mostly are. The bios are laughable, and most people go there to blow off steam.

[MyOwnMan2]

@anon1903 most relationships start on them

[anon1903]

Depends on where you live.

[cryscrys1]

I don’t know why people are in denial
But most relationships DO start online nowadays and it’s not dating app only. At least for me all friends I know met their partners online. And it’s not just for hookup you have to be picky as in daily life unless you are an airhead and an idiot what can I say.
In person relationship fail too if there is no love there. It’s not like when you meet in person it will work 100% never: I even know people who met in person stayed for so long together and at the end broke up and met someone online and got married within 6 months.
Online = as in person same shit different location of saying hi.
A hi at the bar is different than a hi in an app!
Lol pf

[Signinggirl123]

I promise you it's harder. It's possible and I don't want to discourage people from trying different approaches. For year I tried so hard dating, mostly being on the apps. It's a lot of work for a lot of nothing in my experience. The most amount of luck I had was talking to guys for short periods of time and realizing this is really not going to work. But I also do live in a city where I feel like it is difficult to meet guys who are;

Not a tourist

Who want a relationship

And have the emotional maturity for a relationship

So maybe some other parts of the US might be better. My advice for those who are having a hard time meeting people, try it for a few months and if you are not happy just delete the apps and don't go back on.

[Haha456]

it sucks due to lack of variety. You can only get to know those few people who care to message you. While in real life, you can talk to 50 people a night and get to pick which ones you want to go out with. Another reason why online dating has such a high fail rate is because you're nothing but just a face or a picture. Love has so much more than just physical attraction.

Plus, people give up on relationships so easily nowadays because its way too easy to just find another person on a dating app. 30 years ago, you had to find the courage to talk to the opposite sex and ask someone out. Nowadays, you can order a date just like you order a mocha latte from starbucks.

[Orion76]

Absolutely not my experience in dating apps is horrid my inbox is overflowing with beautiful women who really like my credit card info, some i spoke to for a few days they can’t wait to come see me if I wire the ticket money or Amazon card. after you spend time talking or opening up, it’s a slap on the face that makes me think they aren’t doing this for nothing men are actually sending money otherwise why do it. Do you ladies get messages from guys asking for your credit cards to talk to you? Or have men degraded themselves to this point.

[asphaltrhymes]

I voted A. It just depends on what one is looking for, what people are searching for. Either one night flings, short term flings or long term things.

I personally have never had any luck and I've been stood up once or twice. Lol. Ah well.

On the plus side, I guess it's just the way stuff is always evolving and changing. 😋

[OfMiceandMen]

I don't think so. It just emphasizes the whole needle in a hay stack scenario. It is very rare for a real relationship to come from dating online.

The majority of people on those things are more looking for hook-ups and it is obvious based on the amount of information they are willing to share in their profile bios.

[anon1903]

I don't think getting in a relationship is hard. It never was.

The thing is, it takes time and work. Some people are willing to put it. And it's not easy to guess which ones are or aren't. Plus priorities and gender roles are fast evolving — and you're into traditional stuff, yes it's gonna be harder for you.

It doesn't necessarily mean people aren't ready to commit to you, it's just everything's changing and for good.

[RockyHammock]

Peoples attention span are shorter and technology makes interactions at any location or time possible, so its harder to date in the modern environment.

When you do match, you have to constantly be fishing for her attention. If you don't, then there's a good chance you get ghosted. Older generations could go a few days without contact and everything would be normal; try that approach nowadays.

[Adam1978]

I wouldn't blame it all on dating apps, social media is doing as much damage. It's not making things easier, rejection has never been so easy. No consideration or care that there is people behind some of all those profiles.

[uwotm8e]

Dating apps are essentially worthless for all but a few men. Talking to women in person is also useless if you aren't god tier in looks or charisma, or some blend in both to make up the difference. Otherwise you're not really getting anywhere.

[Cathy7734]

I've watched Youtube "Manosphere" and they are saying something like what you wrote.

[HayleeTran]

Hey there! I'm new to this forum, but I couldn't resist chiming in on this topic. As someone who has used dating apps before, I definitely think they make it easier to find people to date. You can swipe through potential matches while sitting on your couch in your pajamas, which is pretty convenient.

[Bekaaaaaaaahhhh]

In some ways yes in some ways no but a lot of people are just on there for attention / hook ups, I guess for relationship minded people they are lucky if they meet someone likeminded.

[MikeTheBartender]

Great poll, seems we are all in high agreement dating apps make serious relationships a lot harder. Hook ups easier than ever.

[TaureanBull81]

I believe it's harder because people don't always have the time nowadays due to our busy lives with our jobs, friends, family etc to be able to meet up even with dating apps. Such is life! 🤷‍♂️

[exitseven]

It is harder and part of the reason is that people always think they can do better. From what I can see, between all the hookups and cheating most people are pretty miserable

[msc545]

You must be kidding. Dating apps are useless and it's almost impossible to find anybody that's actually real to meet and yet alone have a relationship with.

[Anonymous]

More harder. Because people are fake and mostly flirt and use these apps for timepass, even most men are already in commited relationship, married or enagged but still they hide the truth.