Hi guys i’m very insecure sometimes what could I do?

[cecilia200512]

after my boyfriend cheated on me i became very insecure like i’m not all that, be honest what could i improve on every aspect, i’m not gonna do that ofc i think i’m gonna with him again

[OlderAndWiser]

If you are are stupid, you don't learn from your mistakes.

If you are smart, you DO learn from your mistakes.

If you are REALLY smart, you learn from other people's mistakes.

Going back to him will be a mistake, but you probably don't yet realize that and you aren't ready to learn from other people's mistakes, so you must make your own mistakes.

After you resume the relationship, either he will cheat on you again or he will break up with you. Why? Some people don't want to be settled into a committed and exclusive relationship and they rebel when a partner tries to get them in that position. It doesn't mean that you have done anything wrong or that you have a flaw. It just means LTR is not what he wants. He wants the excitement of being with different girls and the most exciting way for that to happen is if it is cheating and therefore "forbidden."

After the renewed relationship fails, take some time to look back at what happened and learn a few lessons from the experience. When a relationship fails, for whatever reason and not necessarily cheating, it is almost always a mistake to give it a second chance. People are CAPABLE of changing but very few people actually change in any significant way; when you resume a relationship, you will soon re-discover the probems you previously had and will again break up for the same or similar reasons. Most people faced with this decision try to convince themselves that they, and their relationship, are the exception to that rule and they will somehow beat the odds; almost everyone who resumesa relationship believes that and quickly discover that they actually were not the exception and the general rule applied to them, also.

In the meanwhile, protect your heart!

[Mynameisbobby]

From what I can see in your profile picture you don't need to improve anything. You look beautiful 😍 Now your boyfriend sounds like he has a lot to improve on. Anyone that cheats on someone isn't worth the time of day honestly. Him cheating on you has nothing to do with you! Sounds like he did you a favor 🤔 Now you know what kind of person he really is. Not only are you beautiful on the outside but you sound like you are beautiful on the inside as well. The best thing you can do for yourself is forget about this guy. Nobody deserves to be treated like that.

[SnowedIn]

You don't need to change or improve. His cheating is not a result of any flaw you might have.

Don't stay with him. You deserve someone who doesn't cheat.

[cecilia200512]

he apologized to me a lot of times, i’m still in school so i see him everyday, people joke about how he was ulgy and everything but i don’t care actually (about looks) just bc somebody is ugly doesn’t mean nothing (that they gonna cheat) he is older than me (2y of difference) he was my fist lover.

[cecilia200512]

i’m still young i admit that i made some mistakes during the relationship but still his fault, after we broke up 1 moth apart i was dating again (big mistake bc i was looking for the same feeling again) this 2nd relationship was better but he was so mature so i broke up. Now i’m single and i don’t wanna date again i like being single but sometimes i question my self why everything happened like that?

[SnowedIn]

So, I'm one of the few on this site who says you can work out a relationship after cheating. That said, I've usually only advocated that after very long, involved relationships. Like years. And houses and cars and kids. Not sure you're there. I still believe you're better off with someone who doesn't cheat.

[cecilia200512]

just let u know that i was 16y but im not gonna go back with him never i need respect myself.

[SnowedIn]

That's a really really smart decision.

[MementoMori777]

you are just not feeling yourself at the moment, we all got those moments but you can't let the bad choices one guy did to you effect how you see yourself, people be snakes nowadays and its not you to blame, can only blame them.

[Bklynbadboy12]

Your looking at this all wrong. Why do you think because he cheated there is something wrong with you? Some guys no matter what they have it's never enough it's not you it's him he's a fuckboy you could be Jenifer lopez and he'll still cheat. Don't let someone else's actions govern how you see yourself cause to be honest with you your gorgeous a beautiful young lady inside and out. Don't ever forget thst ok

[ImalwaysrightOK]

So you've already decided to go back to a cheater instead of having self respect? Why ask what you should do when you've already decided to do the opposite?

[cecilia200512]

i’m not gonna do that ofc but i’m still hurt and i need to do something

[cecilia200512]

to get better

[ImalwaysrightOK]

The first thing is to block him and move on from him. Just blocking someone that toxic and selfish will do wonders for your self esteem. Then, work on being more self advocating. Don't necessarily be selfish, but do things to better yourself before pleasing others.

[cecilia200512]

i workout everyday (i have a personal trainer and a nutritionist) i do skin care 2x take care of my hair, nails, try to read every day etc…

[ImalwaysrightOK]

That's good 👍

[Spade_01]

'i’m gonna with him again'

Yeah, feel free to ruin yourself further. 👌

[cecilia200512]

i’m not gonna do that i’m not stupid I don't know sometimes i think but never

[Spade_01]

There's no going back to trusting a cheater again. Things never stay the same.

No. Matter. How. Hard. You. Try.

[cecilia200512]

yes thanks tho

[Nominal]

Its up to u, situations are why the life is beautiful.

[Wise4myage]

Dump his sorry ass and move on.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆