If someone replies to your texts really fast is that a turn off for you?

[Still-alive]

Came across this post on reddit. Is this a common thing people get turned off by?

Yes this is a turn off for me if they always respond too quickly to my texts

No this isn’t a turn off

I actually appreciate the quick replies because it can be a drag waiting for them sometimes if its too long

It really depends (how so?)

[BunBun369]

It depends on like a few things.
1. If y'all are having a good back and forth conversation. An y'all just enjoying each other or whatever.
2. y'all arguing lol 🤷🏽‍♀️
3. Or you're sexting possibly I don't know.

Also, I Don't necessarily mind a quick text back especially if I am asking a question.
It's different if you aren't hitting em up and they blowing ya shit up. I mean especially if you dont know them. Lol
Or just not respond immediately.
It helps you can block anyone you want to at any given moment.
I only talk to like 2 people texting. Prolly not the best person to listen to. 🤦🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️👀

[whereismyjohnny]

Some people are impossible to please. They complain when someone takes a bit longer to reply. Then they whine when someone responds fast. You just can't please them. 🤷‍♀️ To answer your question, no it's not. I don't see anything wrong with it. I'm the first to reply quickly if I see the message and I'm not busy lol.

[dynamicyandere]

It means I have their full attention, and I appreciate that.


It’s the long distant equivalent to looking you in the eyes when they speak to you and putting their phone away when they’re spending time with you.


You’re sharing a virtual moment.

[dynamicyandere]

The content of the conversation matters too though. I’ve texted someone who texted back fast, but all they ever talked about was themselves, and what they wanted from me. That was obnoxious.

And I’ve also had friends who texted me back immediately, but all it meant was that they were really attentive and engaged.

And of course, I always appreciate it when my significant other texts me back quickly. It makes me feel like a priority and that she’s attentive and listening.

[coachTanthony]

Yes she will subconciously think you have no life no purpose no passion and that you exist to simply respond to her.

[Still-alive]

Would you think this about a girl texting you fast often?

[coachTanthony]

absolutely not. Men and women are different when it comes to social communication.

[Still-alive]

how so?

[coachTanthony]

I think women enjoy over communicating where as we don't. Texting allows women to say stuff that is on their mind to you in real time. Back in the day you had to hold it in until you could talk on the phone or on your next date. Now women can vomit their emotions and feelings and other crap at a drop of a dime as a text message. Most men don't set that boundary though and let them do it over and over and even play along and respond all day long allowing her to get them off their game of life... just my thoughts

[skunk3n]

I assume this is in some sort of early phases of relationship, since you've categorised this as "dating".

I would find this a turn off, especially during the day. I have a life (work life drowned in meetings) and if someone replies to me within minutes.. then my brain quickly goes over to what I should reply. Maybe I won't have time to reply during that instant, will she get upset? And if upset, that drama/dependence is nothing I want to deal with.

But maybe on the evening it would be fun to have some faster replies, if you have nothing going on.

But yet again, phone is for SETTING dates, not to getting know someone!

[Rei13]

Everyone is different. I am a notoriously slow texter to the point you’re better off calling me if you want an actual conversation or just hang out with me IRL. I actually hate texting overally much. That said I don’t mind if someone texts me back fast or if they’re a little slow, the only time it bothers me is if we’re trying to plan something or I need help in which case I’ll just call. When I was still dating I would schedule plans with whomever I was talking to at that moment and go from there

[ZamerZ]

Honestly, that just shows that the other person is engaged and really wants to talk to me. I love when that's the case and when we have something to talk about. I am only bothered if I sent someone an important subject that needs a response in advance of a RL event, see that they're online, and they don't respond to me for days. Especially if it is just a simple Yes or No answer that is required.

[Monalisa77]

The yes or no is really annoying

[CubsterShura]

I respond immediately unless I'm busy or sleeping. Never saw the big deal in it and if someone gets turned off by it then that's not my problem. It's just more convenient for me to reply instantly once I've seen a message cuz otherwise I'll forget to reply later.

[CubsterShura]

Oh and it's not that I'm always waiting for texts and that's why I'm instantly replying. Sometimes I'm multitasking and doing chores or other things that don't require much attention/focus, so it allows me to reply to a text while I am doing something like folding the laundry or cooking lunch.

[LiLee77E]

💯 %
I hardly ever text someone first because I’m always busy. So if they text, I reply as soon as I can, after I see the text. The exception to the rule is replying to my mates who ONLY text to communicate (and don’t speak on the phone). Their messages can be long and they want a whole conversation, so replying to them isn’t a priority.

[DubiousIntentions]

What I want to know is why anyone has nothing important to do then text back and forth all night long? Whatever happened to phone calls? Have they gone the same route as 8 track tapes? Texting is the new way to pass notes in class. I have no idea why answering fast would be a turn off. The questions in here always ask "Why did it take him 10 minutes to reply to my text?"

[Lily_lilac]

I would say those who get turn off by it is simply immature.. Imagine in real life, someone talk to u, u hear it, and u went silent, only to get back again few minutes/hours later. That would be called out for, so same as texting.. It doesn't even make sense to get turn off by someone replying quick (unless u really hate that person)

[Zatsuma]

My biggest pet peeve apart from hearing someone cracking their knuckles is not getting an answer to a text in a timely manner. I like a quick response as it shows you are just as important to that person as they are to you. Even if you can't respond, take a quick few seconds to let that person know as its respectful.

[electromagnetic]

Not for me because I’m that person. You text me today at 10:39 AM. If I see it right away, I’ll respond. If I’ve put my phone away, the next time I take it out is in 2 hours. If it’s important, people know to call. I won’t pick up, but at least I’ll know to keep my phone on hand for that text.

I don’t think I care if people text back in 2 min or 2 days.

[ShellyB]

I would not have made the connection until this question was asked, but I do sometimes find it slightly annoying when someone replies to my text instantly, it feels like all they are doing 100% is texting me and they expect me to only 100% text them, however it has never become a major issue just a thought in the back of my mind. Not dating specific. JMO!

[ZackBan]

I love a fast conversation.

15 minutes of back and forth texting that can settle any and all talking points as opposed to dragging the conversation over 3 days as you send one message per hour

Even in a romantic setting I would rather have a quick back and forth and setup an in person meeting. No point in taking forever

[Little_Bumblebee]

Not, not really.

It's a turn off if he starts to write stuff like "hey, where did you go?" "Aaand she's gone" "ghosting me?" Or anything like that.

Just from not answering from a few hours.
I can be slow at replying, especially if I'm gaming, reading or working on my hobbies.

[NYCQuestions1976]

I suppose it can be seen that way, because maybe she's viewing it as the responding person having nothing better to do than to hang on every one of her messages? However, the woman in this example you posted seems completely unreasonable. She's probably the type of person that would also be mad if a guy waited too long to respond to her. She sets off my "red flag" radar.

[provokeesmokee]

If they're constantly quickly responding, it does make me wonder wtf they do all day.

But it's not a turn off if I happen to catch them when they're not busy.

It's definitely a turn off if they expect immediate, constant communication.

[BoobSlayer]

Boobslayer took approximately a sexy amount of time to respond to your opinion.

[provokeesmokee]

Lol, impeccable timing!

[BoopBoopBeep]

I wouldn't know. I usually send a text then put my phone back down and get back to what i was doing. I'm not going to know if you text til next time I pick it up, and rarely do i look at the time/date

[ta-ra]

No, it's a turn off when they don't respond in a timely manner. Doesn't have to be immediately but leaving someone hanging for 8 plus hours is a sign they don't really want to talk to you.

[AlbantheGreat]

Maybe they're busy, like they're at work.

[ta-ra]

Then they would say hey I'm at work won't be able to respond until...

[AlbantheGreat]

Hum... I don't say to everybody when I'm busy, and before I have a date, like waiting before a therapy, I put my phone on silence mode, so nobody can join me, so I can stay focused. If I was in couple, I would probably tell her I a professional date at such date and such hour, but otherwise probably not.
After, I don't remember If I didn't give any news for 8 hours.
But communication is the key. You could talk to that person about that.

[ta-ra]

I'm sure if you are in a serious relationship with someone you would tell them you would be busy as a common courtesy.
It's 2023 people check their phones often.
But that's just my opinion. I tell people I care for if I will be busy, guess that's just me.

[SandyIA]

Yes! If they don’t have anything else going on so that they can respond to me immediately every time, they probably don’t have much of a life and might turn out to be needy or obsessive.

[Reem12345reem]

if it comes from actual desire to chat or resecting my time or if they think it's a small gesture to show that they like talking to me then no it's not a turn off , if it comes from being desperate then yes

[Smashingdoozy]

Nope, If they're able to reply quickly then it's silly to wait or drag out the reply for no reason

[menina]

I find it surprising, but it's not a turn off for me. Unless, he stops himself from doing other things to reply me.

[DummyThiccFeraligatr]

I like timely replies, but I realize that people are busy.

Some people think you're "beneath" them if you're the one responding immediately while they don't. Shows that one person cares more than the other.

[MikeInHawaii]

If I happen to text while you’re driving, please don’t respond quickly. If you weren’t doing anything, and you answer immediately, I might ask if I can call, instead.

[Brittanyroseee]

I get irritated if my ex situationship takes a long time to respond😂

[Apple1996]

No fast texting is fine as long as they know I can't always reply back fast

[rosemilk]

i'd rather them reply quickly so i can move on with the day lol

[Nikki1989]

I am instantly turned off by anyone that wants to text me, period.

[alice55]

It's a great things id they respond fastly if they don't I'm just gonna do another things

[sirderpsalot123]

If I have my phone on my person and I'm not busy, I'm going to answer. I don't care how they feel about it lol

[elizamichale1]

Instead of complaining this should be appreciated

[Vallanna]

I like quick replies. If I’m free to send texts, I’m usually interested and engaged… and if the other person waits too long to reply then by that time I’m usually engaged in something else lol.

[Fromdusktilldawn]

I actually like that, its reliable. Like if I ask you a question, I do not want the answer in 5h or tomorrow, I want it now

[boobliker]

it is up to the receiver and what they are doing I drive so sometimes it a long wait but if I am on a break then it's PDQ

[annabananna]

No, I usually just think they were already on their phone.

[Lydia_deets]

Because there's nothing worse than holding someone up. If I can give you the respect of messaging, show the same in return. Whether it's positive or negative, any response is better than none

[AlbantheGreat]

I don't see how. But I would say, the texts make the communication more raw.

[coffeeeholic]

No it is not, for me that means they are very respectful to me

[REX_JSWL]

I think it's good if I get regular reply
Well who likes to be ignored

[iseekpinetrees]

Why would it be a turn off?

[Still-alive]

Check out @coachTanthony's opinion

[iseekpinetrees]

Personally never had an issue with it unless they got mad at me because my ass isn't responding because I do have a life outside of my phone.

[JonesT10Apr]

I like to reply very quickly and love to be around the people who really love to reply very quickly

[Shiddidek]

It sucks when your partner responds slow. Especially when you dont have friends

[Jmmmfi4]

I'm interested to see these responses cuz it definitely describes me

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

It only depends

[Still-alive]

On what?

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@Still-alive If people text messages me, and they leave me waiting, deep down they don't give a fuck about me.

[strateguy632]

not a turn off. nor desperate.

[Simslover92]

I actually appreciate the quick replies.

[Paris13]

They are On the Ball. xxoo

[sheenagwapa]

no but i get pressured what to teply

[_SillyShoes_]

On. Definitely on.

[CoolCatMar1]

I think it's cute

[Wonderingguyy]

No I love it. It means they’re super keen 😆

[Wise4myage]

No, its never a turn off in my opinion.

[Bloopbloopbloop]

Fast replies are good

[Likes2drive]

I rather have quick replies then waiting

[EaterPeter]

Who how when why all matters

[EaterPeter]

Thanks for like!

[EaterPeter]

How, not so much 🙂 since we are already talking about texts

[krin_m]

Not at all. I appreciate a quick response.

[azgınteke]

No this isn’t a turn off

[Sparkie460]

I prefer quick responses to my texts

[qqqqq0000]

Its not

[gothbxtch]

not at all!