Why are some boys womanizers? Is it because of trauma or what?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

It starts with men and women's different role in reproduction, and our different reproductive stategies.

A woman can get pregnant no more than about once a year on average, and having a child means she's going to have to spend several years taking care of it nearly every minute before that child has developed enough to be safe on its own for even a few minutes at a time. Because of this, women are inherently hypergamous, which means they look for the best (in genetics and status) father for her children.

Men, on the other hand, could, potentially, impregnate one or two women a day, every day of the year (obviously he wouldn't have a 100% rate of success in real life, but you get the point). Men's reproductive strategy is to spread their seed - to impregnate as many, different women as possible, creating genetic diversity and increasing the chances that at least some of his children will survive even if recessive genes result in some of those children having birth defects or being especially susceptible to diseases.

One of the reasons that marriage was created is to keep both of these impulses under control and to ensure that children would have both parents and be taken care of. Marriage, historically, meant that the man would protect and provide for the woman and the children, and that the woman would be faithful to the man so that he could assure that the children he was taking care of were actually his. Both people had to make some sacrifices, but both also gained things that were of value to them, and the human species continued on.

This all started to collapse with the rise of Radical Feminism (a movement that had been taken over by Marxists in the late 50s, in order to use Feminism as a cover to destroy western culture) and hormonal birth control. These two things effectively destroyed marriage and allowed women to sleep around without getting pregnant - at the cost of losing much of her value as a wife, and also with Feminism encouraging women to take on the role of men and to compete with men directly. Much of the elite ruling class supported this, less because they were Marxists (though many have deep Marxist sympathies), but also because that allowed them to exploit female labor.

It also allowed women's hypergamy to run unchecked. When nearly everyone was married, and there were relatively few single people available, women had to be realistic in their partner selection, and had to choose men on her level. Today, when most people aren't married, the pool of single people is much larger. This means instead of never, or nearly never meeting a top 10% man who is single, most women CAN meet such men today. And if she's reasonably pretty and is still young (i. e., in her 20s), those men will probably have casual sex with her. Knowing this, most women are now all chasing top 10% men EXCLUSIVELY, and essentially ignoring all other men.

The result? Top 10% men have virtually the entire pool of single women available to them, and nearly all of those women are willing to give him casual sex (many will quite literally beg such men to sleep with them). And this means that those men have no reason to commit to ANY woman. Instead, they bang tons of women, and they might keep one around for a little while, until he either gets bored with her or until she starts to become a hassle (such as: wanting a commitment from him), at which point he can dump her and bring in a new girl from his waiting list. Every one of those girls is hoping to get a relationship commitment from that guy (and every other top 10% guy they bang), but not a single one of them ever will, because the guy has all the power and he knows it, and has no reason to give it up.

andreasderjuengere · Accepted Answer

How else can 'we' collect experience to make ''the One'' happy later on in life?

Admitted - some guys may hurt the feelings of a girl they are with; and that's not a good thing.

But in general, I find that ''womanizing'' carries a lot of social prejudices that originate in times that are long gone. Many cultures have missed to grow and to adapt.

So my question in return: WHOSE ''trauma'' is it, actually?

wolfcat87 · Accepted Answer

People saying "it's because of biology" make no sense when their sexist reasoning is broken down. While monogamy vs non monogamy are genetic, they aren't sex linked. If a woman enjoys hundreds of partners, like prostitutes have since the dawn of men, is it because the the long lectures these guys just gave on "sowing a man's oats"? No. If a man is monogamous, is it "just biology saying they can knock up tons of women"? No.
Women also benefit from having many sexual partners.

It's biology in that some people have more monogamous genes and some don't. But, it's also cultural. Most cultures have harsher penalties for women exhibiting the same behavior as men. In any study that allows humans to get away with bad behavior, there will be more people who behave badly.

These men often were not raised with loving parents who could demonstrate what healthy relationships look like. Many were allowed to get away with negative or risky behaviors. Some were taught unhealthy views of women. Some were abused and use sex and women as a drug/emotional crutch. Some are sheep who do it because they think they are supposed to and it makes them cool. Some have low self esteem and try to feel better about themselves by getting girls to give them sex and attention as if it makes them better. There are many factors. Those same factors have similar effects on women who also sleep with many partners and become hyper sexual.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Lot of them do have it from trauma and Ptsd of abuse from women when they were too young to resist  If left untreated they becomr dangerous for women in general

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

It’s because of Biology…

Anonymous · Answer

I think because it is easier than dealing with men.

A man has lots to do to prove himself worth for another guy. I'm talking about average here.

For a woman just don't be a dick as they say, be polite, be dependable, kind, understanding, patient, respectful.. etc,, where I see those as mostly passive, or at best 50/50 passive/active traits.

I've seen multiple jokes of how it is when girls meet as strangers for first time, comparing it to guys meeting as strangers for first time.
Guys freeze awkwardly, while women would spread the smiles and laughes.

And see how are guys or men courteous towards each other in introductions or formal situations.. it just makes you laugh as a spectator and nervous as a participater.
I've been quite unemployed for a while, and you can just see how people who meet you for the first time who seem interested to know you.. just suddenly freeze for a moment, and then quite start this awkward/unhealthy courtesy when know I'm unemployed.

I generalize it even more regardless of such extreme situations, we men are direct. And as soon as I meet you (another gut), the way I ask about you is: What do you do in life? As in: What is your role or contribution?
That's what I need and want, regardless of who you personally are.
Personal relationships come later on.. or maybe not.

Totally opposite for women.
I've heard from my sister and heard from family problems and stories that women would engage and talk and within that storm of a conversation.. there's another storm underneath each sending a message to audience or one of them; signals. Lol that's how women first are with guys.
They want conversations about themselves and you. These unnecessary details I'd say.

So I think guys who are womanizers lack in skill or potential to stand up as men. So they seek verification from woman.

And for mafia men or so, I think in their perspective it is easier to subdue a woman than a man.
Personally I don't, it is just that women would be more cunning, discreet, and patient than men, as a natural reason, being weaker than men. Where reflections are extreme when her time comes.

Flatmanlewis · Answer

Why? It could be for lots of reasons, none of which can be broken down into a single answer.

Because it’s fun. Because women are beautiful and he wants them all. Because it’s a form of self-medication hiding from pain. Because it makes him feel good to catch the pretty one. Because he’s not looking to settle down. Because he is a lonely man and chasing women fills a void. Because he can and why have one woman when you can have 10, 50, or 100. Because he’s a good looking man and women throw themselves at him. And, even your suggestion, there could be trauma and they are seeking to address is somehow.

There are simply too many possibilities to offer a single answer but I will tell you this, the female myth of being ‘the one’ that can change the womanizer into the domesticated man is just that, in my mind. If he thrives on they itch he’s going to have to fulfill it somehow.

aceleon · Answer

nope, we are not like womans yes sometimes it has to do with a trauma but in general if a guy has a game and is good at getting chicks, he turns that way because males are biologically poly while womans are not, we want to spread our genes subconciously.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Tough call. Because its power and they can get away with it. The underlying energy driving them… my guess is its ‘spite’. Its not love. there's personality to it… someone that lacks empathy would ve more likely to.

Some (demented?) People feel powerful when the control and cut down others.

AaronKrieger · Answer

Lack of empathy due to their mindset towards women, which could be caused by various things. It could be something serious like trauma or could be just due to influences in their life like friends, social media, etc.

ohmyguy · Answer

No it's cause u let them u have a clue but red flags waving in your face n you dive in.. probably throwing your self at him jumping over some one already in line.. n he does have choose his words watch what he says.. it's you. that has to do that... n u will cause if not u u won't get chance to beat the girl.. who stole your boyfriend a few months ago

love_conquers_lust · Answer

They decide they don’t have to behave or be civil. Immature girls indulge them offering up their bodies treating them as a game as well. Those girls then can’t fathom why their hearts get broken when they don’t “fix” the womanizer like some romance novel or movie.

Rise above, and you won’t have to deal with it. It’s rare, but there are boys out there who see the writing on the wall and choose a different path.

DextroShade · Answer

Men are built that way, it's in our nature. Most guys just aren't able to act on it but those few men that can usually do. If women want these men to stop womanizing then they should stop spreading their legs for them. I will never understand why women will reject or friend-zone regular guys just to get fucked by a felon with multiple baby mommas.

Anonymous · Answer

There isn't a one-size-fits-all answer to why some individuals, including boys, may engage in womanizing behavior. It can be influenced by various factors, such as personal experiences, upbringing, social environment, and individual choices. Trauma might be one factor for some, but it's important to recognize that each person's situation is unique. Understanding someone's motivations often requires a nuanced exploration of their personal history and mindset.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

Because 99% of women are chasing after 10% of men. They have unlimited options so why would they want anything long term.
Most men aren't womanizers they don't get the option to be. But those men are also invisible to women so you never notice them.

Paris13 · Answer

Roving and Roaming Eye with Some Guys. To Me, A Lust. xxoo

rienna888 · Answer

I don’t think it’s trauma probwbly from broken heart. But I think they just crave attention and approval from the opposite sex. So the more a women does with him, the more validation and attention he’s receiving to know that he’s still got it

Anonymous · Answer

Mostly having good family money , less responsibilities in life , having assests motivate men to be players. That's a lifestyle that not every guys can't afford. If you follow that lifestyle you will get surplus women. The player guys I know typically change girlfriends every month , everyone know them yet every girl wants them cause they are rich.

ThrillSeeker01 · Answer

They don't know how to have a real true deep relationship

IslaTheWitch · Answer

Because they can. Because they have fun. Because women fall for it.

sheikalana · Answer

Because men are chasers. It’s in their genetic code.

Djaay · Answer

Womanizing is a false mask worn by those of great insecurities and lies to project themselves as irresistible to women   . A false strength and charisma.

syncheart · Answer

Men are very very very horny. If he happens to be good with women, and women are attracted to him. He's tempted to have sex with as many as He can get his hands on.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

I got picked on by a lot of girls in school that might have something to do with it

Anonymous · Answer

Because they can, women fall for theses guys even knowing they been with countless other girls and settled for none. That is just being stupid if not asking for being taking advantage of.

Anonymous · Answer

Trauma? lol! No! It's because they CAN be! VERY few dudes can pull it off.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Because the top 4.5% of men CAN be womanizer's.

blackcowboystudbrady · Answer

Some chaps believe womanizing is a sign of masculinity.

Anonymous · Answer

Because it's what women reward generally. Some men are womanizer from the start. And the others learn to be when they learn that being a womanizer is rewarded.

Staximus · Answer

Low self esteem

Anonymous · Answer

Biological need to reproduce with as many females as possible, that is why men wasting their money on women, should create something to eliminate libido.

WhitneySnow · Answer

Yeah I think it is

Anonymous · Answer

I love it when pussy lips are around my big dick. When I inpragnate her, then she want more

Anonymous · Answer

Because they have options.

Kelly6 · Answer

genetics in men

Jamie05rhs · Answer

They probably learned it from their fathers.

HouseMoat · Answer

Usually some sort of family issues

deus_ex_sisyphus · Answer

Because its fun

whistlingwh0res · Answer

Because they want bigger tits

purplegage · Answer

Because they're horny

DreamLife7 · Answer

What does not liking you have to do with trauma?

riverrat3 · Answer

Some just copy dad

Wood3nWhal3 · Answer

It's because you touch yourself at night

Why are some boys womanizers? Is it because of trauma or what?

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