Would you date someone you're not physically attracted to but who meets all your other criteria?

Question

So, is it physical attraction first or all the other elements of attraction (intelligence, charisma, sense of humor, etc.)

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

no... part of my criteria is to be attracted to the one I love I however, do not have a pre-set list of physical standards and... all of my girlfriends were physically different

dolemite58 · Accepted Answer

I have to be at least somewhat attracted to her physically, she doesn’t have to be an instagram model but I wanna date girls I think are cute at least.

coachTanthony · Answer

Physical attraction comes first 98.9 percent of the time. So no I would not date someone I am not attracted too.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Physical attraction usually comes first because the first think a guy knows about you is how you look, and most young guys are immediately attracted. . . or they aren't. Those other qualities are important but we need to start getting to know you before those things become apparent.

As I have gotten older, I have developed attraction to a few women who I did not initially thought were appealing, but I liked the other things that I knew about them.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

I think if I like their personality, I’d manage to be attracted to them physically too.

_Lynx · Answer

Differentiate between a man's perspective and a woman's. Each has their own priorities.

Physical attraction is subjective of how each percieve givens of appearance.
Anyhow, most importantly is to be accepted / easy to the eye. You don't need to be that one people don't want to take eyes off.
Showing that you take care of your appearance is that matters, regardless of the end result. It is the act of taking care of your appearance you need.

So being okay, and taking care of yourself.. good-looking is enough.
What naturally attracts others are your facial expressions, your posture, general body language. These can attract even if you speak no word.

Thus, ensure no unattraction. So that you as a person are accepted and looked at as okay.
That's what you only need in physical appearance. Otherwise the whole rest relys on you as a person.

I would see girls physically very attractive, lets even consider their makeup as well. But the way they look (eye contact), posture, other body language cues are all indicating someone empty on the inside. Thus, not attractive at all.
I would pity those people.

Overall 👇In Arabic, it is said that someone can look beautiful/handsome from outside.
Though, when they speak, their speech would negate their good-looking appearance.
Someone can have both beauty factors of appearance and speech, yet when they act, their naive actions or bad decisions can negate both those beauty factors.
Lastly, even if someone had all those three of appearance, way of speech, and decisive and well-planned actions.. yet they were arrogant,, arrogance negates all of that beauty in whatever they do.

wolfcat87 · Answer

Yes, as long as I'm not repulsed by them in any way. That's how I chose my first husband. He met every criteria on my list for a partner. But, on our first date he had a mustache I absolutely hated. 😅 I was debating even going back for a second date just because of it. But, every woman I showed him to couldn't stop talking about how handsome he was. I was pretty surprised. So, I sucked it up and went on more dates. There was no attraction until he got rid of that darn mustache 😂 Once it was gone he grew on me. Especially since he fulfilled everything else on my crazy list of husband demands. 💕 I always considered it a sort of self arranged marriage rather than a love match. We've been together 17 years now, and I couldn't imagine any man doing a better job.

CaptainOverthink · Answer

The physical attraction has a lowpoint that I think I wouldn't surpass, but all the other aspects are the things that makes for exceptions.
It's a bit weird to talk about the sum of attraction, I mean it's not that one-dimentional and it's not like it's always comparable between individuals. But there's still a choice to be made.
Rationally; Character should always win over the physical. But we're not mainly rational.
Emotionally; Character is still a huge point but if physicality lacks even it's lowpoint (wherever that may be) then, sadly, there's always room for friends.

RebelinSteel · Answer

I have chatted to people (over a long period, multiple times) over the phone, we have really got on well and although some has been work, we did spend time just talking, that formed a level of attraction and then I visited where they worked, and that other attraction supported the visual attraction. You can have it round the other way, however the person needs to meet a certain level of physical attraction or you only have the emotional, communication interaction. It’s always about being realistic about the physical side of attraction, both will be judging, you may think she is wow, she may not think the same 🤮

Yoursweetgirl · Answer

That's how I started dating my now husband lol I wasn't attracted to him physically even a bit when I got to know him, but over the years he changed. Also he always managed to fuck me well so I've got nothing to say on his appearance. He lost hair, then got hair implants, used to go to skinny and slim and then gained a lot of weight but tbh I just don't care. Even if he becomes the ugliest men in the world, he's still so great in everything that it doesn't matter ❤️❤️❤️

sawno · Answer

No, especially not after having been with a girl who met all my criteria.
But attractiveness is very important since I will be sexually exclusive to her, I can't do that if I can't enjoy the sex. If she is actively turning me off then that won't work.

Luckily my standards for attractiveness are reasonable and don't require models.

magiusX26 · Answer

if am not physically attracted, then no. physical attractiveness is the foot in the door to get things started and it alone will not keep my attention either. this is somewhat the natural order it should be because you can not really assess someonexs personality with a quick glance but you can physical attractiveness. on top of that, what would be your motivation to want to get to know their personality (as for a romantic relationship) if the physical attractiveness did not spark your interest? this is also how humans, and most every other non-plant life forms work. not just in dating/mating either, food, shelter, or collected items (anything you or and animal mite collect that is not food, sheltet, or mate, including clothes) .

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t know, sex and physical attraction is very important to me. The size of the banana is also important to me.
I have a high sex drive.

I would say these come first. Because otherwise, how am I supposed to get wet?
I need to be wet just off looking at him. How am I supposed to be satisfied if he’s small?

It won’t work.
I’m gonna be miserable, disappointed, dissatisfied. Sexually Frustrated. The chances of me cheating are high…
etc etc etc. This is common sense shit.

You could say, none of that matters. You’re gonna see how much it really matters, all by yourself.

caitycat21 · Answer

Hell no, physical attraction is a huge part. Everyone deserves to be with someone that is physically attracted to them ! But personality will always be #1 priority cause looks can fade but good character and personality is forever

sage2021 · Answer

It all depends on what it is exactly that you don't feel attracted to.
There was this maan that lived across the street from me and he was newly divorced.
I didn't find him attractive because he wore his hair like he had a from, then had a perm and very small rollers were used. It was kinda big too

Then about a month later he came knocking on my door and when I opened the door I was shocked at how handsome he was just because he changed his hair style. It was still a little long, but straight and feathered.
His personality I always was attracted to but once he got rid of that curly hair it made all the difference.

zeitgeist057 · Answer

Nope.

There's a word for people who fit all "my other criteria", such as being interesting, kind, smart, &c. and to be honest, I don't actually have a list of criteria because I've met people who weren't smart for example but it's not a dealbreaker if they have other good qualities. But anyway, if I'm not physically attracted to them, but they are otherwise awesome, amazing, &c., then they are called:

Friend.

A good example is every guy friend I have. I love them for whatever reason, but I'm not physically attracted to any of them

Would you date someone you're not physically attracted to but who meets all your other criteria?

, so they are my friends.

AmeriRiver096 · Answer

I’ve found that for me, genuine attractiveness plays a crucial role in building compatibility. It goes beyond just physical appearance; it’s about connecting on a deeper level. I believe this forms the foundation for meaningful relationships. Everyone has their own preferences, and this is something I’ve come to value in my approach to dating.

RainbowMarinade · Answer

When you get to know someone who has the qualities you want, they will become more attractive to you.
That’s been my experience. Knew someone for a number of years superficially. Never had any kind of physical attraction to him.
Then I got to know him.
I developed a crush.

Bricealan · Answer

Of course I would. I know, I have dated many women who were much more attractive than I, but they saw something in me that they liked. I think that cuts both ways... but I have to say that my women friends and loves were MORE on the attractive side than I, but then, we never see ourselves as others see us. Who really understands attraction.

cosmosis181 · Answer

Yes, because I've learned that if a female goes out of her way to get me to notice her looks first-which most do-she has a big huge 🛑🛑 sign taped to her. Beware... snake ahead. There'll be a WHOLE HOST of other issues attached to her, which will be fed into non stop. If looks are NOT the first thing I notice... then there's a very real possibility of further exploration.

BlissfullyCurSed · Answer

If that person just looks ehh to me, of course then. Nitpicking is almost never a good idea. 😆😆

Forceinhand · Answer

It is honestly difficult for me and no, if there's really no attraction whatsoever I can't. Not because it is the most important factor because it isn't, but it is needed. No attraction means poor sex life and poor sex life equals sooner or later a break up.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Yes, partially. I have to be at least SOMEWHAT attracted to her. If there's nothing there, then it won't work, unfortunately.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Nah, it just means I can be friends with them.. I gotta like looking at you all the time.. At least.. LOL..

Berethor · Answer

Men don't tend to care much about other elements, I am not sure if I would compromise.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

I guess, I've noticed that when you catch feelings for them, their appearance starts to grow on you as well

Likes2drive · Answer

Attraction is what gets you interested to find out more about them but if they have a bad personality and none of your interests then they will just be ugly to me

lilyanony1 · Answer

Do I like their personality? Can I look at them and find something pleasant? If yes then I might go on a date and see how things go.  Looks fade but a personality and core values last forever.

jaycool26 · Answer

I think it depends on the person. Tbh if someone looked average [like a 5-7 rating scale] and meet the other criteria that's a win win. Looks isn't everything but we have to be attracted to some physical traits that what makes us human. We all gonna hve physical flaws we just have the guts to move past them. For example my favorite crush is Selena Gomez because she has a personality I'm drained to , she is good looking to me tho but mainly her personality traits stand out more.

menina · Answer

I probably wouldn't. Physical attraction is a big deal to me. It's not the most important thing but it matters to me.

abstractly · Answer

No because I’m not gonna plan on marrying someone that is for example unhealthy and obese just because he never fails to make me laugh 👎🏾.

Screenwriter · Answer

It's a combination. Unless you aren't interested in having a physical relationship, I think the whole package needs to be present.

Bella2423 · Answer

Maybe. Many people you might like their appearance but they might have a bad personality and vice versa

HaveNoName · Answer

Physical attraction is not everything, but it IS the FIRST thing.

MsBell2018 · Answer

Yes, absolutely. My 1st husband wasn't my "type" & I wasn't particularly attracted to him. However, once we went out & started talking, he became more attractive. We dated & I fell in love with his personality & married him.

Levin · Answer

No ma'am. She doesn't have to super hot. But at least agreeable in some form.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Yes, I married one. I couldn't care less about the physical.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

No im sorry I can't date you if I'm not attracted to you

HawkPerception · Answer

If she had my ideal personality (which I'm convinced is impossible to find), then I would, but I wouldn't go lower than a 5/10 for that. My minimum is usually around 7/10 for physical attraction

Dinklex3 · Answer

No, lol. Physical attraction is needed as well. I have plenty of people called friends that have great personalities who I enjoy spending my time with.

WhitneySnow · Answer

It’s everything. I think if I met someone who met all the other criteria, I’d be physically attracted to them too. My standards for physical attraction are pretty liberal.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

No. If I am not physically attracted, then it’s a no go. Women are more so attracted to things like a charismatic personality than men are. Men are very visual creatures. Physical appearance is huge to us.

DextroShade · Answer

No, if she doesn't pass the boner test then I won't bother getting to know her other qualities because they don't matter.

TaureanBull81 · Answer

Physical attraction always cums first for me in the courting phase followed by the rest of the attributes. If I'm not physically attracted to a woman then it's not going to work out I'm afraid.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

It depends how outside of "attractive to me" she is. A very average looking person can become "beautiful" to you over time.

HighValue · Answer

If I am not physically attracted, why would I talk to her enough to know those other things about her in the first place?

Brady · Answer

No I wouldn't. It's physical attraction n the othr things.

collie22 · Answer

If a friend needs a double date to feel safe I probably would.

Apple1996 · Answer

Yeah looks don't matter too me

Miah04 · Answer

Naw. That's just silly

Sharkstealth · Answer

I'm to fucked up in the head to have any meaningful relationship. Nothing really matters much to me to date except that I can actually stand to be around them.

FireFox001 · Answer

Some amount of physical attraction is required for me.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

I actually knew a girl like that, and I'm gonna say "NO." Physical attraction is just as important.

Sonorous · Answer

No I am extremely shallow

Booklover_90 · Answer

No. I have to be attracted to him.

JamesRandiDebates · Answer

Sure. As long as the pussy is good and plentiful.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I have to find her physically attractive

justabuddy · Answer

You will be amazed at how a persons physical appearance will change once you get to know them. So I say yes

Ironic_Method · Answer

Nope. I require both.

sheikalana · Answer

Nah, I couldn't.

Hotboy_booblover · Answer

Yes if the girl has nice boobs.. everything else is fine

jshm2 · Answer

That's not how attraction works, kiddo.

Would you date someone you're not physically attracted to but who meets all your other criteria?

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