Is there any truth to the saying, "you will find love when you least expect it"? If it is, then why?

Question

GuyAnswersGirls123 · Accepted Answer

It was absolutely true for both me and my little sister. I met my wife when I practically gave up on relationships and my sister met her husband the same way.

What we both did though when we gave up on dating was to start making a boatload of friends and expanding our network of friends.

In my case in Japan, I did it by building a friend group so large and encouraging people to invite any nice new people into our group that it expanded in size so large that we were able to rent out entire nightclubs and restaurants to our own and have our own cheap private parties. Then I met my wife through this expanding friend group one day at a picnic (friend of a friend).

In my little sister's case in the US, she tried online dating and got so sick of how it seemed all about hook-ups that she just gave up. Yet similar to me, she started making an expanding group of friends, initially staff at her school (she was a high school teacher) but then started attending their home parties and throwing her own, always inviting new nice people to join. She met her husband that way at one of her home parties (friend of a friend).

I think one of the reasons this statement tends to be true for a lot of us is that our standards are much higher when we're reluctant to date than when we're eager to date. When I was eager to date, I just dated practically any pretty woman who I got into an engaging conversation with since I was lonely and tired of returning home alone at night. I wasn't very selective.

Another is that I think when we're no longer eager to date, we start dating people we know well within our community instead of people we barely know. With my wife, we were good friends hanging out with our mutual friend group for almost a year before we went on a single date, so I already knew her really well and our mutual friends could vouch on behalf of our character. They also attended our wedding. Similar case for my sister: she and her husband were friends for around half a year before they started dating.

Saiesh30 · Accepted Answer

Well, you know the thing about such statements is that they're not universal in nature.
Reason being every individual is different, has different thoughts, different beliefs, different ideologies and different desires. And all of this actually decides how his/her life is gonna be like.
That being said, it's true that once you stop running after any of your desires (not just love) and get occupied in your life elsewhere, that's when you'd find that desire coming true. The simplest of an example from my experience would be this girl who I had a huge crush on but she was definitely out of my league. I did try occasionally but didn't push myself too much and after a year of actually giving up on her as I left the job, she was like my closest buddy. I find that example dumb by the way lol 😂

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

The people I know that were actively looking for husbands or wives met their husband or wife when they were not looking for them. One guy was disabled and worked a manual labour job and had asked out hundreds of women before meeting his wife while selecting apples at a farm orchard. He met her when he wasn't looking for her, he was just looking for apples on a farm. I know somebody else that met their husband while supporting her friend who ran a dance studio by paying for dance classes there.

devilish-cutie · Accepted Answer

not at all, dont wait girl, life is often cruel and practical. Learn this early and dont expect anything being handed to you. If you like a guy give it a chance, you may regret it later on and not meet someone who you like for years. It may not work out and he may not be for you but at least you tried. Feeling are important but you need to also be very practical about things

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

Kind of true.

When you don’t look for love, you don’t pretend to be a good person, you are whoever hell you are deep down, not trying to impress anyone,

and Voila, someone sees you and thinks you are irresistibly cute just the way you are.

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

It is true... sometimes. One of my closest friends was absolutely a doomer. Straight anti everything, very angry and isolated when around girls and they didn't like him. He gave up and said he'd never get a girl.

Then he came home after being away for awhile and he completely fell for a girl and now they're engaged. It came out of nowhere.

Now that definitely doesn't mean wait patiently forever but there's definitely a added layer for it being a natural occurring thing when you are patient

Create21 · Answer

Yes. My wife had just come off a two year relationship when we went on our first date. We’ve now been together for 27 years.

Crimsyjo · Answer

I think it's certainly possible. Just, for me, I was 8 years single and not looking or "expecting" it and nothing ever came my way. So it's only now that I actively put myself out there have I had lots of options. Not so much of love... that's still something I'm waiting to see about... but the possibility of something with someone...

LaNc3L0TT · Answer

Because everything you are forcing to happen can go under some issues and complications because you are "going all in".

If you go just easy with thinking "it will happen when it happens", you will have different approach entering with a "cool head" and you will not be driven with feelings, big expectations, etc.

Tstrbrainer · Answer

There are over 8billion people in this world, each living different lives.
So yeah, I think statistically it is possible for a good number of the population to have experienced it and hence it is true to them.

But it may not be universal. 🤓

exitseven · Answer

It was just like that with me. I was dating somebody that really did not treat me very good. We were going to a concert and I planned on dumping her after that. It was just another in a series of bad relationships. I planned on giving up dating , maybe forever.

I met my future wife the very next day.

JacobJordan · Answer

Soon as I stopped looking and just went "whatever if it happens it happens" a few days later I went out to eat lunch and saw the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I went back to that same place for 2 months so I could talk to her and ensure I wasn't having the wrong feelings. We have been married for closing on 2 decades

Yannae · Answer

There is no guarantee like that. I think the best way is to go out and actively trying to find someone, but there is always that chance that you run into him when you happened to not be out with dating in mind. Just don't wait for that to happen.

RingOfFire · Answer

Great question. I can only answer that from my personal experience all of the meaningful relationships I have had happened unexpectedly.

I think the reason why it may happen this way, or at least appear to happen this way, may be that you cannot go fishing for love, it is something that has to find you. That's the best characterization of it I can think of offhand from my own experience.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

Yeah… that’s how and when I met my husband… here on gag…no idea…less expected!!

WaddleGirl · Answer

My Mom says that all the time. I hope there’s truth to it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Katebfun · Answer

No and I can't stand they stupid saying. I've focused on having my best life and still no o e magically knocks on your door to ask you out. Even if you go out men nowadays are way too feminine and scared.

snowboarder720 · Answer

Yes. This is when you’re just being yourself and not trying to be someone else to gain someone else’s attention. This is literally the best time to meet someone special.

HappyWoman34 · Answer

It’s because you’re not coming across as needy and desperate. You know and everyone else knows by now that you don’t NEED a man to be happy, you only WANT one. That’s a huge turn on for guys.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

Change "Will" to "Can" and I agree, because life is unpredictable like that. My now boyfriend approached me out of the blue, I didn't plan on meeting anyone new that day, I was on my way home and he approached me.

katiesmuff · Answer

In my case it is exactly what happened. I was on vacation with some girlfriends on one of the Caribbean Islands where I met and eventually married the love of my life. That was 12 years ago and no regrets.

SolitarySolace · Answer

Nope. I’ve been single for 9 years and never once expected to meet someone who would change that. I’ve rejected a few girls and haven’t had one interested in me for 3 years now.

Al_Musafir · Answer

No, not necessarily. Although actively looking out for love wouldn't help either.

Lavandin · Answer

I think this statement is true. I always tried so hard and what happened? Nothing happened. Maybe sometimes you just have to let time take its course.

renodnol32 · Answer

Im not sure. There are so many saying out there. Humans came up with it. Humans aren't perfect. So it is safe to say that perhaps maybe this saying is not for everyone.

Asad1ONE1 · Answer

Of course not. Any achievement is irrelevant to one's expectations. Every achievement is relevant to hard work.

Heolurt · Answer

Maybe for some it works like that, others might have to actively search for it while it just doesn't exist for some of us.

Anonymous · Answer

Not true, you have to be orking at it and looking for it or opportunities will pass you by.

war_daddy · Answer

no that's dumb like all sayings. you need to work hard to find love.

Sameone · Answer

Lol nup is not true all

MrShaun · Answer

Had a buddy of mine always say, "You'll find love in the least of expected places." Course he's a proctologist.

In_Trance · Answer

Because desperation is ugly

NathanDavis · Answer

it did happen for me, yes... at least twice

Flatmanlewis · Answer

This was EXACTLY how it happened for me.

Nikki1989 · Answer

That is usually how it works.

Jennz6 · Answer

I hope so

grega239 · Answer

No. Seems to billshit in my experience

Squatting_Slav · Answer

100% in my experience

laly520 · Answer

true to some extent

Eleni1996 · Answer

Cause it happens when you list expected.

Is there any truth to the saying, "you will find love when you least expect it"? If it is, then why?

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Is there any truth to the saying, "you will find love when you least expect it"? If it is, then why?

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