Why am I attracting different people since I dyed my hair?

[Anonymous]

I used to have black hair, but I attracted men who wanted to date me (I met through dating apps). But men strangers will ignore me and wouldn't give me the time of the day. I recently dyed my hair dark brown, men strangers treat me nicer and also notice me and give me more attention. However, guys I go on date with (still using dating apps), seem to not want me anymore for relationship, only sex... why is that?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that's kinda weird how your hair color seems to be changing who's into you. My best guess would be lighter/warmer tones like brown can sometimes make you seem more approachable to strangers since it's a "softer" look. But on the other hand, black hair comes across as edgier and more confident/intense.

So friendly guys may find brown hair friendlier, while guys just wanting something casual could see black as sexier. Like brown says " come say hi!" and black says "wow she's hot but probably won't date me." If that makes sense?

Color can definitely influence perceptions without us even realizing it. Maybe try experimenting a bit more and see what vibes you attract as it changes. Don't feel like you need to change yourself though - the right people will like you for you! Could also be coincidence and takes time to find real dating potential no matter what. Keep being awesome!

[Asker]

Oooooh yes that makes sense, I think your answer is on point. I remember when I had black hair, 90% men I met off dating apps, saw me as potential girlfriend. But strangers weren't friendly at all and I was never once hit on. And when my hair was brown, guys I met off dating apps didn't seem interested after first date and saw me as more sexual. But more guys asked me for my number and I got more attention from strangers.

[Oliverlogan263]

Yeah luv, honestly it makes total sense to me based on what you described. Guys can sometimes be real shallow and judgey about looks without even realizing it. Changing up even just your hair color enough can subconsciously give off different vibes to people. Like with the black hair, guys online probably thought "oh she's more serious girlfriend material" but strangers felt intimidated. Then with brown hair, strangers saw you as more approachable while the online guys just thought of you as a hookup now almost like your "worth" changed to them, which is stupid.

I think you hit the nail on the head - hair doesn't define who you really are or what you want. Those dating app dudes switching up just cuz of hair gotta have some issues. Wouldn't worry about it honestly and just keep doin your thing. You sound cool and smart, you'll find someone who sees you for you without trippin over stuff like hair color. And hey, on the bright side at least now you can tell easier which guys are just tryna get in your pants from the ones really interested in getting to know you!

[Asker]

Lol thank you, I don’t know if I should dye it back black or leave it

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah that's a tough call man. On the one hand, if you liked how you felt with the black hair and it seemed to attract more serious guys then maybe it's worth going back to. But the brown ain't so bad either ya know?

If it was me, I'd maybe try out the brown for a bit longer to see if the kinda guys you meet change up at all still. Give it more time to see if you find someone cool. And in the meantime, really rock that brown!

You could also play around with styles like dark brown with black highlights or something too, get the best of both worlds. Or keep a pic of you with black hair on your profile so those more serious dudes still know what's up.

Ultimately do what makes YOU feel good and confident. Fuck what other people think ya know? You gotta like how you look most. Maybe give it a month or two with brown and reevaluate then if you wanna change it back. But I'm sure you'll pull either way, you seem pretty awesome!

[Anonymous]

That is weird. People are strange. There is no making sense of them.

[Asker]

LOL yes it's actually so weird. I wonder what it could be

[Apple1996]

People treat me very differently based off what color I've had my hair. I usually stick with red but I notice a difference even between dark and light red. People are more willing to approach if my hair is lighter in color

[Asker]

Yes girl, it's really strange how people are friendlier and approach me more with light hair. Yet people that I went on dates with saw me as more of a potential girlfriend when my hair was black. Now guys I go on dates with don't seem really interested afterwards and sees me more in sexual light instead of relationship potential :(

[ritxi]

Is black your natural color?

Is the color you have dyed you hair like this?

I'm surprised because it isn't so striking but in my opinion, guys use to see girls with natural hair color as intellectual and girls who dye their hair as reveler.

I remember that some girls with dyed hair scared me when I was younger. In the other hand, I have seen many girls who become less friendly with me when they dyed their hair, but I don't know if it was mirroring effect.