Do you talk dirty with someone you are dating? After how many dates is it ok to do that?

[Anonymous]

[dustybiker2]

Your Q reminded me of all the old men who would just randomly say things to me as a teen. Even a couple in front of my mother. I grew up around male friends so wasn't intimidated by them. They weren't happy with my dry responses about their age and their inappropriate comments, I can still hear my mother's belly laugh.

Point is some people are just raised like this. It's a default. Other people will never lean this way. Then you get the people you click with and just get you. You can talk mushy and dirty all you want as you feel when a moment is right.

[provokeesmokee]

Yes.
It depends on the people - my girlfriend and I texted sweetly for a few days but got right into the nasty after we had sex, lol.

Often our dirty texting isn't too dirty. It's just intimate mostly and sometimes spicy.

But me and all my partners enjoy dirty texting so... We do it often, lol.

[Anonymous]

There is no rule here , and I consider it quite a personal thing and has got to be done in the right way for that person if at all. It’s by no means an exact science. You have to be able to read and already know the person quite well. It can be a very intimate thing indeed personally I’m not a fan of it but have had partners that really liked it while others that found it really awkward. I think you have to dip your toe in the water and test it to get a bearing and be able to judge well by the reactions.

[Asker]

The guy I’m dating is a gentleman however he leans towards this kind of talk so I played along. I think this is helping us to form a bond. Thank you for sharing your opinion.

[HawkPerception]

I've sexted a couple times before. Not too good at talking dirty in bed though 😂

And it doesn't take much for me to do it while dating. If they want to do it the first date, I'd be up for it.

[Asker]

Do you want the woman you’re dating matches your sexting energy? Does it let you down if she lacks a bit but tries to keep up the intensity?

[HawkPerception]

Yeah I'd like her to match the energy. And it does let me down when she tries, but doesn't seem to into it.

I think sexual compatibility is extremely important for a relationship and if a girl isn't turned on by the same stuff I am, it's likely we're not gonna work out

[DishLady]

You have to read the situation. It’s different with every relationship. Stop if you see the other person is either uncomfortable or lazy about reciprocating.

[Asker]

The lazy part is important to note. Glad you mentioned.

[mandyfire98]

Yeah and it depends on the chemistry on how quick. Usually through texting and definitely during sex.

[Chazmatazz269]

Never really got the hang of that.

[Asker]

Yeah I am not a fan either

[curiousmandy]

It all depends on the connection, the person, the situation, etc but I certainly have and am open to it if it’s done tastefully and the person can read the room well to adapt if necessary

[Asker]

Makes sense!

[DizzyDesii]

Yes and often before the date is even thought of 🤣

[Asker]

😂 makes sense

[DannyUk2017]

Well from My Pov in my situation, i would do it when we are intimate... But it makes her Uncomfy or she doesn't answer to my lines, then i would Stop. But if she's ok with it and she get aroused by it then... damn... i would make her go insane...😈😅

[Asker]

Got it, need to read how other person feels. Thank you

[DannyUk2017]

Very welcome and Good (shag) ermmm.. Luck.. i meant luck..👍🤭😅😂😂😂

[Asker]

Lol.

[liggang]

Hell with some people you start dirty talk before you're even dating!

If you dont know you would always ask.

[Asker]

Thanks, your opinion was helpful to understand this

[dean53AU]

I have done that but unsure how long it took.
Think we were already talking dirty before we got together

[Asker]

Thanks. This was helpful to understand it can be done before even getting intimate.

[dean53AU]

Your welcome

[lightbulb27]

I ask my date to vaccum the floor within a few dates. Its a good test.

[Asker]

I wish dating was that simple

[Rafrenc]

It all depends on the Girl more than anything the way she thinks and based off her experience she might be ok or not
Some woman like only when there turned on
I rather it to be slightly

[Asker]

Makes sense.
Do you want the woman you’re dating matches your sexting energy? Does it let you down if she lacks a bit but tries to keep up the intensity?

[DreamLife7]

Ma'am you're damn near 40 and unmarried. Have you learned anything? This is why you're unmarried and struggling. You don't even know how to be relationship material. You're a h03

[Asker]

Go back to the cave you came from!

[Med_guy1978]

It could be very soon but you need to make sure the other person is into that. Some people find it vulgar and offensive.

[Asker]

True!
Do you want the woman you’re dating matches your sexting energy? Does it let you down if she lacks a bit but tries to keep up the intensity?

[Med_guy1978]

I'd be happy if she was on the same wavelength as me as I love dirty talk. If she wasn't, it wouldn't be ideal but I'd live with it as I was in a very long relationship and she did not do it and thought it was offensive. It just doesn't work for some people.

[Asker]

What will make you stay with a woman who isn’t returning dirty talk energy on the same level as you are giving her but still makes effort? Will her other qualities like values and personality make up for it?

[Med_guy1978]

Of course, if she is making an effort in our relationship for example doing her hair, dressing nice and looking nice is more then I could ask for. Personality is important in the first place, being humble, generous and kind is the most important thing otherwise those would be the main factors. I could live without dirty talk as I have done but it would be great... 🤪

[Asker]

Haha, I understand it clearly now. Thank you for explaining!

[Med_guy1978]

I'm here if you need me.

[Asker]

Thank you. I’ll be sure to get in touch again

[Asker]

Hey, can I dm you? I went in fourth date with this guy and we had few misunderstanding which we clarified. I’m still confused about few things. Your male perspective will really help. Pls let me know if I can DM or you prefer to talk on this thread instead.

[Med_guy1978]

Yeah sure 😊

[Asker]

I just sent follow request. Pls accept. I think I can only dm once accepted. Thanks

[Kit_Kat88]

Yes if I really like them. I mean what I say when I talk dirty but I want to wait and get to know them more before going through my dirty talk ;)

[bobby_bush_eater]

Generally it would be right before we're gonna have sex for the first time or after we already have.

[Asker]

That’s so true.
Do you want the woman you’re dating matches your sexting energy? Does it let you down if she lacks a bit but tries to keep up the intensity?

[bobby_bush_eater]

I think either is fine. I think myself and most men really like having effort or energy being returned. If it isn't it feels one way, like this is just for me but you like it too or you like it but I'm doing everything.

I personally won't have sex again until marriage but I definitely will want my wife to engage in it and at times initiate. Effort in the relationship is usually noticed and helps things long term.

[Asker]

Got it. Thanks for explaining. I understand it well now

[Wise4myage]

I would only do that after I got to know a girl.

[Anonymous]

It's alright after you get to feel secure with them. Otherwise no

[Asker]

True, agree!

[Anonymous]

I'd flirt but I wouldn't talk dirty unless we're intimate.

[Asker]

I was thinking like you do but realized the guy I’m dating is leaning towards it so I went for it

[Anonymous]

15 minutes into the date that’s enough time lol joke

[Dongie]

However many it takes for her to hint at it.

[Asker]

Hint at?

[Dongie]

Yeah, like saying a semi nasty word. With a look in her eye.

[Asker]

Got it :)

[dinojames22]

Depends on the flow of things.

[Asker]

Can’t agree more!
Do you want the woman you’re dating matches your sexting energy? Does it let you down if she lacks a bit but tries to keep up the intensity?

[dinojames22]

Let down, no. Sometimes it's fun to break them out of their shells

[Asker]

So I’m dating this guy who is highly experienced than me sexually. I’ve just been a nerd and lack experience. He waited till I was comfortable to kiss and I initiated our first kiss. He liked it and said there were few skill issues and he found them cute and will teach me tricks. So I guess he is into me.
We always talked about work and general things and I moved the conversion to flirty and a bit sexual, kind of mild sexting. He continued it and I thought it will make things lead to causal so I dodged his dirty question a bit. He replied and talked dirty and then said “you have no chance to win him at dirty talk 😛”

So I replied with a dirty response. I’m not sure if my lack of sexting skill will be a turn off for him.

I shared all the above so if you can please let me know what this looks to you? Does he seem interested to continue dating at least?

[dinojames22]

Perhaps you just need practice

[Asker]

That’s for sure and lot of learning too.

[dinojames22]

What have you learned so far

[Asker]

Nothing lol

[dinojames22]

Need help?

[Asker]

Im good thanks, I’ll wing it