I'm sure there are a few, but overall, no. The idea that most men are "afraid" or "intimidated" is laughable. Sure, there are a few exceptions who are - every generalization has exceptions - but you really should get that idea out of your head.
To start with, a lot of men aren't looking for a relationship AT ALL - and for those men, if they're looking for a woman, it's just for casual sex. Maybe 25-30% of all men are in this group - but what's probably more relevant to you is that virtually ALL of the top 10% men (as defined by women) - the men that nearly all women want - are in this group who ONLY want casual sex from women and nothing more. The really hot guy, the really successful guy, the really high-status guy, the guy that all your friends gush over? He's not looking for a relationship with ANY woman - just casual sex. And you won't change him.
So, let's talk about the men who ARE looking for a serious relationship and/or marriage. Just as women have certain attributes they look for in a man, men have attributes they look for in a woman. And I'd say that most "relationship guys" don't really care all that much what color her skin is - that's not among the attributes they care about.
natural (no tats, piercings, body mods, blue hair, implants, BBLs, lip fillers, cheek implants, etc.)
good morals and values
family-oriented rather than career-oriented
You'll find that "relationship men" tend to be more traditional, more conservative, and have higher morals and values themselves.
The problem, of course, is that "relationship men" tend not to be "exciting" enough for most women. They aren't selfish and self-centered enough to be wildly successful in business (because they're satisfied with a good deal rather than completely screwing the other person over), they aren't as self-obsessed enough to look as good, and they are "boring and predictable" because they are responsible and reliable. This is why most women - younger women in particular - tend to be drawn towards the exciting and dangerous bad boys and Chads/Tyrones - the kind who will have one or more of looks, power, status, or money - but who will use her for an evening or a week and then kick her out or ghost her or cheat on her.
Getting a "relationship man" kind of takes a commitment from a woman from a young age to become and remain "relationship material" - and most young women today - regardless of skin color - don't seem to be interested in that. I have no idea if that applies to you or not, so this isn't an attack or accusation, it's just information. The fact is that women when a woman hits puberty, she essentially has all the things that make her valuable on the "relationship market" to be able to get a quality partner. The hard part is that she has to choose to behave in such a way to KEEP that value until she finds that valuable man (which means she also needs to prioritize finding a relationship over other things when she's young). Most women today, unfortunately, are choosing to throw away their value and prioritize fun and hedonism and careers rather than relationships when they're young, and then, only after they've diminished their value significantly, do they start seeking a relationship - believing (FALSELY) that their market value is HIGHER simply because she's older and more experienced and has a career and income. But relationship men don't value age and experience and careers and income - they value youth, innocence, purity, fertility, and women who are family-oriented.
@OlderAndWiser My father was a relationship man, as he and my mother were married for 53 years until Dad's Feb.26,1990 passing at 76. Mom joined him eternally Oct.9,2003 at 86.
I think this was well written, but that’s not my type at all and actually idealistically. I went on a tangent hosting this question. It seemed as if the men that came up to me were unavailable. They were either with someone, had children, Didn’t know how to start a pilot light on a water heater and even I know that.
I pose the question for other race simply because I know that black men of my own race don’t want us sometime, but I do see that in racial relationships work when it is a black woman with other instead of the opposite and I just wanted to get a better understanding of it
Re-read your question: "Are men afraid of dating black women? . . . Most people only go off stereotypes and never just ask"
I am not sure if you understand but your question suggests that non-black men are avoiding black women because of racist stereotypes.
1. My impression, from the complaints I hear on this site, is that black men also don't want to date black women. Are they, too, racist?
2. Do you think that if a white man doesn't want to date a black woman, that he is motivated by racist attitudes? Maybe there is something about black women that is different, other than just the color of their skin. Maybe that is why so many black men avoid them as well.
But I would note that you are making statements about men (presumably non-black men) on the basis of YOUR stereotype. Isn't that just as reprehensible?
3. I am not attracted to black women. I was raised in a racist culture. I then attended a junior high school into which many black kids were bussed, and they were pissed off about being bussed to our school. They were more racist to us than we were to them. The black girls talked about sex every day, they talked in the most vulgar language, and they were violent. It was shocking and repulsive to me and I have never since been attracted to black girls.
However, I am not afraid of dating women of different races. I have dated Hispanic women, a native American woman, and several Asian women. I am married to a Chinese-American woman.
4. If I was worried about being PC (I am not,) I could have pretended to be attracted to black women and dated them. Would that be the right thing to do?
I'd say most men are "disinterested" rather than than "afraid" when it comes to dating us due to societal standards of beauty (and the aforementioned stereotypes). There are also those who are only looking to "experience" black women as opposed to showing genuine interest, which is sickening.
Despite all this, there are men, black and non-black alike, who genuinely have an interest in black women.
I wouldn't necessarily say afraid, but most men even around the world think black women are less attractive. Even if she's black African, from the islands, etc. Unfortunately the majority of humans in the world think light skin and white skin and features is the most attractive, especially in women.
Now this is a very honest opinion, and I truly believe this in most societies and a lot of cultures. The fair the skin, the lighter, the skin the more beautiful that person is there are some that think different but it’s rare.
@hahahmm Most black women see a handsome, wealthy black man as a pride ornament because a good many are gold diggers. (As are many women from ALL backgrounds.)
Honestly, I think it’s an individual base type thing I feel like everybody tries to date with their own race first and then they get to explore. It’s shouldn’t be an issue because we’re so forced to be with our own person because building but you fall in love with who you fall in love with, there’s nothing wrong with that
It’s very rare that a man is actually scared or I imitated by a woman. I think women who say that are just trying to make themselves feel better as to what the real truth is. The only time I think a number of men might be intimidated by a girl is if she’s really gorgeous. I think a lot of men in general don’t find black women attractive. I’ve only found a few of them attractive myself. Those have been movie stars, never ever someone I personally knew or seen in general public. In general men just don’t like dealing w drama. There’s a difference w when women say oh he just can’t handle me, I’m a boss bitch or something like that. It’s not that we can’t handle her, we don’t want to handle her. A man shouldn’t have to handle a woman. She’s a grown adult, she should be able to handle herself. Unfortunately most men see black women as masculine, argumentative, rude, disrespectful. Even a lot of their own men don’t want them. That’s not to say there aren’t other women of other races who aren’t like this cause there are. It just seems as though black women tend to be like this more than other races. In my experience w black women I’ve seen in public, a lot of them act ghetto. Just the other night, I went to jack-in-the-box. I went to the drive-thru. After I ordered my food I drove around the building to go to the widow. This black lady drove up to the drive-thru going in the wrong direction. Turns out they got her order wrong. She was pissed, cussing up a storm at the staff. Plus I think black women are more racist than other women when it comes to a black man dating outside of their race.
I’ve been approached by a few beautiful black women and we have a fun banter to begin with… the issue I have is that not long into the friendship they get sexually vulgar and forward as hell. They start off asking me if I’ve ever been with a black woman, which I admit to never having experienced a relationship with a black woman. Then they begin to talk about their favorite sexual acts and such, asking me to confess my faves etc… and then it moves on to how they want to suck my dick and fuck me and whatever. Now granted I love sex but I don’t enjoy being approached like this and I usually stop talking to them afterwards. If I was single and in my 20s or something then maybe this would be fun. I dunno. But at my age I want to make a real connection and move into sex organically. Anyhow, not afraid to date black women. Just never met one worth seriously pursuing
It's never fear. Some men aren't attracted to specific features typically found in black women (but would still fall for a black woman who doesn't have those features)
I've been on a few dates with black women. Never anything long term or serious but still it was natural.
I recently have a new co-worker who's also a black woman and she's not hiding how into me she is. Scary part is that she's a total smoke show and I'm into her too.
But dating a co-worker is never a good idea so I'm trying to behave, still her advances are not easy to resist
Am I afraid of dating Black Woman? Nope, would love to be together with a Black Beauty.
I love Black Culture and Music... Without it I would not be who I am today.
If I could move to an African country... doesn't matter which one of the 54, though I do of course have some preferences... I wouldn't hesitate a second.
Jamaica would be even better than an African Country.
I won't say all but: If a woman acts masculine, rude to men then it's not attractive to guys who weren't brainwashed into thinking that's normal. A lot of guys in the black community think it's normal. Connect the dots. It's totally NOT normal in Africa tho.
I have a feeling that this is an American focused question. Things like having a stereotype, how? A girl from Liverpool is completely different to one from Truro irrespective of skin colour. Why would anyone be concerned about another persons skin colour? this type of question could potentially confuse Europeans.
i love how women just by nature are trying to gaslight men. why "afraid"? why did you choose that word? you're automatically invalidating any possible answer by assuming it is "fear" men feel. why can a man not just legit find black girls unattractive? why do women always resort to a negative words, loading even their most seemingly innocent questions? man women really are masters of psycho terror.
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Anonymous
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No, I've done it in the past. I think the real reason black and white don't mix is less on the couple and more on the external. Family and friends will treat your SO as an outsider and be overly critical of their behaviors and blame any successes, failures, or percieved shortcommings on their skin tone
In the Navy I witnessed a young Black girl and her White boyfriend being harassed by a Black man, who was telling her she should be dating a Black man and not her boyfriend.
The young couple were just high school students on base, and the Black man was actually a sergeant in the Army!
It's not about being afraid, it's about being turned off by stereotypes surrounding black women, like being loud and not having core family values. That said, a traditional black girl, perhaps from Africa instead of USA, sounds rather appealing.
If you're attractive and feminine, there are legitimate countless guys that want you. Race doesn't change that fact. If you aren't, then don't blame your race. Blame yourself for not being fit and not acting feminine.
Not all men are. To be 100% honest with me as a white man, I only prefer to date white women because I can only find a white woman physically attractive like Natalie Portman and Jessica Alba.
Jessica Alba isn't "white" (she's half Mexican and half mixed western European, like myself), and depending on your definition, Natalie Portman isn't either.
Lol I made this pose way before knowing anything about white history month which is wild. It’s just a question. I also have to be equally as willing to accept the date in order for it to become something right so I was just making a post you’re doing too much actually.
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