Guys, am I over thinking?

[Anonymous]

I was seeing a guy exclusively for 5 weeks, [I am 30, he is 31] and we just cut it off because it was just feeling weird, I didn't like his lack of communication and emotional intelligence. we say we will stay friends, he still wants to hangout with just me at times too... but what caught me off guard is that he messaged me this AM even tho we didn't talk much, and we talked about stuff and I was like I still enjoyed hanging out with you. he said he enjoyed hanging out with me too, and that he was looking forward to continuing to spend time with me.

that Is what caught me off guard. that doesn't sound like something a 'friend' has ever said to me.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that does sound kinda confusing coming from him after you guys stopped seeing each other. A few thoughts:

- Saying he's looking forward to continuing to spend time together makes it seem like he's not fully accepting you're just friends now.

- Guys don't usually get that excited about hanging just as pals after dating a girl. Unless he still has some underlying hopes.

- His communication issues are what put you off in the first place, so I'd be careful getting feelings mixed up again if he hasn't improved there.

- You could ask him straight up what he means by that comment, if he sees you guys as just friends or has other intentions lingering. Get clarity.

- Proceed cautiously hanging solo if you're not totally over him. Don't want you getting hurt deeper.

- If he can't be fully trustworthy as a friend without it being weird, may need more separation. Friends without benefits.

At the end of the day, just listen to your gut. Do what's best for your peace of mind - even if that's distance for now. You seem like you've moved on anyway!

[noohair]

The major problem with texting is misunderstandings. A text is like an email, it is a low form of communication. When people speak to each other the communication is more solid.

[EnjoytheDay777]

What was it that he messaged you that caught you off guard?

[Asker]

"he said he enjoyed hanging out with me too, and that he was looking forward to continuing to spend time with me."

[EnjoytheDay777]

Maybe give things one more try, unless you've really have decided you're not into him.

[spartan55]

You really think he wants to be friends?

[Asker]

yea, why?

[spartan55]

Why would he want to do that?

[Anonymous]

CYou think too much, girl.