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After 4 years of dating, we broke up with my ex-girlfriend, but since the breakup was mutual, we stayed close friends. We broke up because our relationship wasn't perfect and she wanted to move out of our country and I wanted to stay, and since we weren't perfect for each other I didn't wanted to be the one who keeps her here.
After the breakup, she suggested that we could try again, but I declined since then she would have stayed for me. I even encouraged her to start dating, and now that she has moved away, she found a guy for herself.
I was certain that I would be able to move on, but now that she has someone the realisation hit, that it is completely over. And I miss her very much, and all I want to do is ask her for an other chance, but I cannot do that because she is happy, and I wouldn't do anything that harms her relationship with her new boyfriend. But all I want is to be with her, but I feel like I realised it too late. And I feel awful because I don't want to put her relationship jeopardy by talking to her. But she is my closest friend and the only one I could talk about it.
After the breakup, she suggested that we could try again, but I declined since then she would have stayed for me. I even encouraged her to start dating, and now that she has moved away, she found a guy for herself.
I was certain that I would be able to move on, but now that she has someone the realisation hit, that it is completely over. And I miss her very much, and all I want to do is ask her for an other chance, but I cannot do that because she is happy, and I wouldn't do anything that harms her relationship with her new boyfriend. But all I want is to be with her, but I feel like I realised it too late. And I feel awful because I don't want to put her relationship jeopardy by talking to her. But she is my closest friend and the only one I could talk about it.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Dude.. that's a rough situation. On one hand, you both are single now so technically nothing's stopping you from asking her out. But messing with her new relationship would be an a-hole move. Just think, how would you feel if she did that to you?
I get you miss her a ton now that it's really over. But sometimes you don't know what you got till it's gone. Sounds like your first mistake was not fighting harder to make it work when she wanted to try again before leaving. Now you gotta live with that regret, even if it wasn't exactly wrong at the time.
Here's what I'd do - don't say anything to her about wanting another chance. That ship has sailed man. BUT, you can let her know you're still here as a friend if she ever wants to vent or get advice. That way the ball's in her court without pressure from you.
Maybe down the line things will change and there's a chance. Or maybe you need time apart to really heal and find someone new. Either way, don't be THAT ex, you know? Respect her new situation, then see what happens. Keep your head up bro - it'll get easier with time!
No, lonely and desperate, maybe.