Our second date is a Netflix date at my house. Do you think it will lead to more than just watching movies?

Question

I'm worried that it will lead to more and I'm not really ready for that but I'm looking forward to watching the movies with him and I hope that's all that he wants to do. Am I being naive?

VIVANT · Accepted Answer

It can not magically lead to anything you don’t want it to. He’s not a mythical creature descending from

the sky into your couch. You’re 33 you have agency. Communicate to him that you literally want to watch the movie. If he has different expectations it’s important to shut that down. If there is a real divide in what you both are comfortable with it may not the the right person to watch a movie with.

i know Netflix and chill is a thing but that doesn’t mean no guys actually like to watch movies and can do it without sex.

I would not assume a guy I’m dating would assume a movie meant sex but I wouldn’t date a guy I don’t trust. the fact you are worrying about him, is what bothers me here. Not the fact I assume he expects sex.

Do yourself a favor and talk to him if you’re concerned. If you can’t talk things out, reconsider.

PrincessC16 · Accepted Answer

Just be upfront before the date. Let him know that it is a boundary you have set. If he doesn't show up then you know that sex was all he wanted.

SteveSmith1985 · Answer

You are being naive. That being said, you can (and should) make clear that this isn't what you have in mind. You can wait until the moment, or set the parameters out right from the start. Or even before the date. I'm a big fan of nobody being confused.

There is an implication about a Netflix date at your house. It's not that he'll be coming expecting sex, but he will be thinking there's a high likelihood. He's certainly hoping. He wouldn't be surprised. Otherwise...(the thinking goes) why wouldn't you choose some other activity for your date?

Again, there is no expectation. It's just a private place to have your date. So it implies you might want to be alone in a way you can't do at the movies, or dinner, or mini-golfing or whatever.

What it leads to is entirely up to you. Always.

ManOnFire · Answer

They don't call it "Netflix and chill" for nothing. Even if you're not expecting 'more' there is a good chance that he will. Make it clear early on that you're not ready for that kind of thing yet.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

You know almost nothing about this guy and you invited him to your home for a second date. Don’t you think that is a risky situation if you aren’t ready to have sex with him (and I’m not suggesting you should do that.)

AviatorTom · Answer

What I think isn't important. What you thin is what's important. I would caution going into a date with a pre-conceived notion of what might, or might not, happen. Just njoy the date.

Finchie40 · Answer

I am sure he is thinking it will

NoDecision · Answer

That's your idea for a date, watching TV with a bowl of popcorn? But, I'm thinking that you don't really want to go out, so TV, and some activities afterwards that may require licking hot butter off of certain body parts may be in order.

https://www.reddit.com/r/MichaelJackson/comments/yypyqv/new_michael_jackson_thriller_popcorn_hd_meme_gif/?

NathanDavis · Answer

he should be able to notice that you would not be comfortable with it... and if he doesn't then make it sure and clear to communicate to him of this that you're not ready for more, just movies

Shiprex · Answer

If it's what you want to happen then maybe it will. Sounds like you don't want that to happen so say so in advance. Make sure the message cannot be misconstrued and stick to it because if you let it go there after saying so, then respect and boundaries are thus opened to being broken and pressured.

loveslongnails · Answer

Wishing and hoping isn't the way to go. Lay out the ground rules and stick to them. If you're "worried", and I mean truly fearful that you'll be subject to sexual advances that he would not stop if you told him to, that's a problem. If that's the case, you shouldn't even be dating the guy, much less having him come to your house at all.

Caroline91 · Answer

I think it depends on how well you have known him before you had your first date. If you only met him a short time ago, I would hold off on this kind of date, just to avoid an potentially awkward situation.

MemeSupreme · Answer

just talk to him or tell if he tries anything

i personally don't do dates like that until i trust and know them more. bc by that point they've probably figured out i don't like touch and i don't gotta worry about it

slatyb · Answer

this is often considered an invitation to sex. Have you made it clear that it's not? If you haven't, you should.

NicholasRedone · Answer

@simslover92 I'd cancel & it's a known slang term - google Netflix and chill slang meaning : it does mean sex

777GgG · Answer

So it keeps it strictly movies. If he makes a move decline it. If he asks why be honest. Men can be respectful.

If he's not understanding or tries to convince you to do more send him home. He's not worth it and you should move on.

bowenw · Answer

That kind of date is leaving the door open to more. Perhaps after the movie go out for something to eat if he is giving signs of unwanted affection.

OneViewpoint · Answer

Maybe. Go as far as you're willing. Be honest and sincere about your limits. Let the chips fall where they may. Better than waking up with massive regrets. If he can't handle that, be grateful you found out early rather than later.

spartan55 · Answer

So he's driving an hour to Netflix and chill? Oh boy...🙄

sage2021 · Answer

Geeze! Don't you have any self restraint at all? How about self discipline? Any self respect?

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

I don’t think it’s bad to hope that but realistically I feel like he’s gonna want more. I don't know I feel like romance and cuddles is scarce these days.

Anitha001 · Answer

I think at 33 you should have the ability to assertively but subtly tell him no if he does. you should never lay with someone just to please them and be afraid you'll lose them if you don't. setting healthy boundaries is essential for any relationship if it is to succeed.

WhitneySnow · Answer

It probably will if you let it. But if you push his hand away when he goes to feel your boob and just stick to holding hands and a kiss goodnight, he should respect that.

SixFootSexy · Answer

Don't hope that he will be a mind reader and pick up that your version of Netflix & Chill doesn't include any chilling unless you clearly communicate your boundaries.

Kelley1 · Answer

He will not do anything you don't allow. However, at your age, your choices are limited, so if you do nothing, he may choose not to see you again.

Screenwriter · Answer

Yes you are. If you want a movie date that does not carry any overtones of sex, then go OUT to a movie.

AaronKrieger · Answer

He will be reading the room and seeing what the boundaries are, but most likely it will just be cuddling and kissing at most.

alice55 · Answer

It's very unsafe to go on a date at someone house so quickly... Yes he would obviously want sex

sawno · Answer

Up to you, he will probably initiate but if he's for you he will respect the not yet.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

That's extremely naive lol Netflix and chill is code for "sex at your house" for a reason.

Zack-Bann · Answer

I don’t know if the date already happened

But my guess is the guy had a condom on him “just in case”

What it leads to is up to you ultimately but I doubt he’ll be the one to say no if you made a move on him

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know your date, but it's possible, maybe he is hoping for more.

exitseven · Answer

I say it will just be a movie date. Make popcorn and enjoy his company.

Redgreenwood · Answer

Yeah i hate to say it but guys typically have a certain thing in mind when they plan netflix at home lol... but provided you make your stance clear it will be fine

Mark987 · Answer

Ya I think it will lead to way more than that, unless you tell him first.

Staximus · Answer

Don't invite some guy you just met over to your house like an idiot

RedInnocent69 · Answer

That’s kind of the point. Pretty naïve to pretend otherwise.

realitydoubter · Answer

Surely there should be an attraction and desire there between you both or else what’s the point but that doesn’t mean anything has to happen according to any form of schedule.

PeterLegg91 · Answer

It's a tough one , let's hope he's a good boy 👍

Sleephazard · Answer

It will lead to more if you don't set boundaries.

Girly1212 · Answer

I bet he got hard tho

MoonFace2 · Answer

Yeah. Naive. But not stupid.

Wise4myage · Answer

It will if you want it too.

Blueeyes81 · Answer

Yes, yes you are being naive.

LiamS95 · Answer

Maybe if you let it.

shortster · Answer

Whose idea was this?

Cristi019 · Answer

Well, usually it's Netflix and "chill"...

Pterodon · Answer

Depends on you

CubaPirate · Answer

That's for you to decide

Our second date is a Netflix date at my house. Do you think it will lead to more than just watching movies?

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Should I invite him over to my apartment to watch a movie for a 2nd date?

Our second date is a Netflix date at my house. Do you think it will lead to more than just watching movies?

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Should I invite him over to my apartment to watch a movie for a 2nd date?

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