Would you ever date someone who couldn't speak the same language as you?

[Anonymous]

I met this guy last year whilst working together. He knows no English and we used to communicate through just joking around and one or two words. We got on really well even though we couldn't understand the words that were coming from each other we understood each other in different ways.

He's from Bulgaria and moved back there not long after I rejected him. One night after he hugged and wouldn't let go and kept saying "girlfriend" "girlfriend". I got really scared and confused over what he was trying to say. I told him "no, girlfriend " because I just couldn't imagine being with someone who I couldn't understand. We'd use Google translate outside of work sometimes but we weren't allowed are phones whilst working.

Most my male colleagues seen this take place and pulled him away from me as I think they assumed he was scaring me.

After that he stayed away from me until he moved back home. Now he's a police man in Bulgaria and recently he messaged me through Facebook. He gone the effort to send me the message translated in English. He was just asking how I was doing and that he was sorry how things ended between us.

He asked if we could be friends again and I said of course. We often text now and said videos to each other. He recently sent me a package pull of snacks and sweets from his country and I sent him some of his favourite British snacks that he enjoyed when living in the UK.

I still feel special connection between us and it makes me really happy when we talk. Some part of me regrets rejecting him back then and I kinda wish I was more open minded and tried to learn to communicate better with each other.

He talks about me visiting him a lot he's never out right said it but he says stuff like. "I'll have to show you this restaurant back here one day" etc. He's slowly learning English but it isn't great still and I'm slowly learning some of his language and we just laugh off the little mistakes

[Cormac995]

Girl you're living a real-life romance novel. Just enjoy the ride. The fact you care about each other so much you're trying to learn an entire language just to be able to talk is beautiful. The dude 100% still has feelings for you this sounds like a really strong connection. Keep learning each others languages in fact you can help teach each other as a way to bond and spend time together. This isn't a bad thing.

Don't be scared or concerned be hopeful and just enjoy your time together and everything will fall into place on it's own as long as you let him know you're interested. He might be afraid to make a move again after the first rejection so if you want to spark that flame again, you'll need to tell him how you feel if you think this is what you want. Also, the reason he won't make a second move on you probably is because he wants to respect your boundaries and since you said, "No girlfriend." that's pretty clear even if you barely speak English. Speaking as a guy that was probably a heartbreaking experience for him and he was probably beating himself up about blowing it and being stupid. So that's why I say if you want to get together with him you'll need to re open the door he won't want to because he respects you. I think when he hugged you and said that he was trying to ask you to be his girlfriend given the context. It's kind of hard to ask someone out when you don't speak, they're language he was probably doing his best to communicate.

This isn't a lot to go on but being honest he sounds like a sweet guy and an earnest one too. You could do a lot worse.

[MannMitAntworten]

I have a friend who loves Bulgaria. He picked up on the language while there for a month to get by. If he could do that in a month any reason after a year you both couldn’t have learned enough to communicate without a translator? Immersion does work.

[Anonymous]

Maybe it’s better to let go of this idea. I mean when he was calling you his girlfriend before, he hadn’t moved to Bulgaria, that may not have even been a plan at the time and dating you would’ve been much more convenient. Now he’s moved back to his country and without some sort of solid plan for either of you to relocate, nothing can happen. It’s great that you guys vibe and I think both of you enjoy the conversation when you can understand one another but between the language barrier and the distance I just don’t see how that sort of relationship could work.

[PeachyPie93]

There was a guy who was really cute and nice from Tunisia saying he wanted to marry me, but I couldn't really understand him. He kind of knew a little English but not enough to really talk much or get to know each other lol. He told me to wait for him to learn but it's like we lived in different countries, he's better looking than me, and we have different religions and cultures.. so what's the point? Plus he had like an ego and arrogance about him that I didn't like since he was always posting on socials and doing that fuck boy pose and licking his lips LOL

[Asker]

Yeah I've noticed the arrogance in a lot of them type of men but this guy is really different he's so sweet and innocent. Almost like a dumb little puppy dog 🤣

[PeachyPie93]

Aww well that seems like a good thing. You gotta like the sweet ones..
Its totally up to you if you want to date him or not lol.. If you seriously like him, then go for it.

[alli-112]

I wouldn't, but that's certainly a story. Good luck.

[sawno]

No, dutch or English is what I date otherwise there is no point.

[andreasderjuengere]

It's my daily reality here.

We mostly communicate through interaction.

And for deeper conversations I have other people at hand.

[exitseven]

sure, i would give it a try. I think some things transcend language.

[TwoToTooTutu2]

You will be able to understand. You spend enough time with someone you adapt. It's natural. If you really like him. Maybe you should give it a try

[nl171]

Probably not. It may be fun at first, but when things get deeper you’ll have little to no true communication

[Summeroflove]

It would be VERY difficult

[Pohjolan]

Probably not but then again what's one new language?

[Nikki1989]

No, that would never work.

[jahaims]

Nah, too much is lost

[Anonymous]

Nope.