How often are you rejected?

[Anonymous]

I'm rejected 100% of the time.

Updates

11 mo

I believe in multiple forms of rejection. There is the one where you approach someone and they tell you no. But there is also quiet rejection, where they don't tell you no to your face, they behave like they don't want you around. Like you are in a group of people, and those people behave as if you don't belong around them. They decided in their minds that you are not worth anything to them, and you can tell that it would be crazy to even approach one of them to ask them out on a date.

[Flowersareawsome22]

Yes I was rejected by my ex Jestin. Worst feeling ever when you love someone and that person doesn't love you or have the same feelings for you.

[BlondeGoneWild]

Rarely, but it hurts when I am

[DishLady]

Hmm. I have to think.

I've never been solidly just "rejected" -- like I go up to a guy and he rejects me or I'm sitting somewhere and not one guy comes up to me.

But you know, sometimes you give an association "the good old college try" and things don't work out bc personalities aren't compatible or situations don't allow for you to go further or... well... whatever.

[mstbooblover]

Call this phenomenon a form of natural selection. This indeed happened to me rather often that some particular groups made me clearly understand I was not welcome, or best case scenario, barely tolerated. Now, to be honest, I also understood I really did not belong to those groups. I most probably would never have abided according all their more or less silly rules. My mind and nature have a more practical tendency, rather than running after illusionary and idealistic societies.

Mind I do not complain: fair enough in many cases. One can propose oneself, but then one must also accept the answer, be this one be explicit or not. I do not blame those groups, the more I have a fair good idea of what a non conventional member would mean in the field of coherence in a group. A particular group of people also will without even thinking about it, defend themselves against potential and even imagined dangers.

I'm not afraid of approaching any person I fancy, or any group I'd like to know more about, but I also accept whatever their reactions. If a particular path is not ours, let try another path with philosophy ;0)

[Screenwriter]

Where are you finding the people you are hanging around?

It sounds to me like you're approaching the wrong groups of people if they're acting so hostilely.

Perhaps you need to find more copacetic groups.

Have you tried Meetups? These are groups of people who have similar interests. Might be a chess group, a sailing group, a volleyball group, a book club group, a conversation group. Meetups have a broad variety of folk who are looking for others like them. Cooking groups. Walking groups.

Find groups of people who are OPEN to meeting new people and welcoming.

Sounds to me like the folk you're around are closed and unwelcoming, so go elsewhere.

[Asker]

@screenwriter
Years ago I tried meetup groups, and discovered that nothing in my area fits my abilities. The other people were in Churches I attended, and at the school I cleaned.

[Screenwriter]

Try again. That was years ago. You might find more groups suitable to you now.

[aaron13547]

To be accepted you have to know your worth it. If you believe your not enough your going to not be enough. If you believe you're the king of the world more people will see you that way. I'm rejected as much as I put myself in that situation to be rejected. Not trying isn't the solution not being afraid to fail is the solution. Never stop trying never stop bettering yourself believe you are the purpose and you will become the purpose. Try some life coaching. Learn to become the man you know you can be

[Asker]

All of that sounds crazy to me.

[aaron13547]

It's is and crazy is what women want. They don't want average everyone is average. To be the best you have to be uncommon among uncommon people. Trying watching some David goggins motivational videos. There is a different in motivation and discipline. Don't you want to learn what it is?

[Asker]

The crap you are describing is crap. That is why this world keeps turning into crap. Because people keep teaching crap, and believing crap, and following crap. Eventually everything will turn to crap.

[aaron13547]

With that attitude it will. I am the proof you could be great to i was the lowest piece of shit in the world before i choose to believe i wasn't... you have the instructions you only lack beliefs. No one can help you but yourself. I hope the best for you man.

[alice55]

if you act like a king while you're trash you're gonna look ridiculous and people are gonna mock you

[Asker]

@alice55 , @aaron13547 The reason why I go off like that, is because people like life coaches, seem to be telling you to fake it until you make it. In other words lie about yourself to the world, and the world will respect you for it. As if by telling yourself those lies will make things better. Be positive all the time and you will attract positivity. I think what you actually attract is fair weather friends. Because sooner or later your flaws will show, and those people will leave you. I think it is true that sometimes people get into a mind funk to where they believe the worse about themselves. That can be kinda corrected by someone who encourages you. But at the end of the day you are not your own creator. You are not as much the captain of your own ship as you think are you. We all know that life throws curve balls at us. You got one thing planned and something happens out of your control, and you got to change direction to make things work for the sake of living. I have a learning disability. When I was in school, the only solution was to work harder. I worked so hard that I didn't have time to hang out with other people. That is how bad that was. I didn't choose that for my life. Just like some people are born will issues that keep them from being able to walk. No amount of positive thinking is ever going to fix someone's legs. They got to work around the issue the best they can.

[Asker]

What if they got even more issues. I have more issues than just my learning disability. A lot of people go on medication to solve it. I tried medication, and due to another health issue, one that I didn't choose, those meds don't work for me. So that means try something that is unconventional. That is a lot of experimentation. Change your diet here and there, until maybe you can find something that helps some. Like I said, this crap about fake it until you make it is garbage. All you can do in life is do is try to do the best you can. But what if that best you can do is not enough? Some people are lucky, they have people who come along side of them, and help them. Other people can't get that help. Telling those people, to just believe more in themselves is not going to help them. That is why I get so upset when I hear these life coaches. It's like they think everyone in this world has all the same abilities and opportunities as they do!

[aaron13547]

Fake it till you make it is about believing in yourself before you do. you say no amount of positive thinking can fix someone legs but I have actually coached someone whos legs didn't work he never left his house he hated himself for it. Once he saw past his inability and began to focus on all he did have to be grateful for, rather then what he didn't have. he started going out and slowly becoming whonhe wanted to be. Its been about a year since i met this fellow. This past weekend I ran into that person at a public swimming pool he was floating in water. He called out my name and thanked me for teaching him to make his legs work... fake it till you make it is learning how to believe in yourself when you have no reason to. It's learning find your way through to flow through life not fight it. Learn to lead your life not react to it. That makes you a creator... I'm sorry you feel the way you do man. Energy is a real thing thou, you only get the energy you give. If you always do things thinking it's not enough it'll never be enough. That's as real as you and I are and I hope you can see that one. Also if you ask me your disabilities that made you work harder then anyone else isn't a shortcoming it's a strength it taught you things no one else had to learn. If you truly have worked harder then everyone your life for the same things in my opinion that's make better then everyone not worse. There are mindsets that make us better and mindsets that hold you back its choice how to see it... have a good day buddy keep an open mind.

[aaron13547]

I got a video for you this guy changed my life. Also this matters to me because I felt just like you do now in my past. I got past it you can to.

https://youtu.be/qAdPbu_zkOc?si=9kVW_ShqQtgboEAU

[alice55]

The only things that ll help you is thinking I can do it it won’t change people perception of you but if you say I can do it and believe it during 1 years you ll start to be a Little more confident

I told myself I could smile to my crush and after 3 weeks I was able to do it if not when I think it s dead before begining I just lose all Hope and don’t do anything

But this work to change my perception of me not other perception of myself

[Zack-Bann]

Rarely rejected
And when I am it’s very cordial and respectful


I’ve met guys who get rejected with the middle finger


That being said I am not easy to “love”
Meaning while I can score a date, eventually the woman will decide against seeing me in the very long run


(The few who didn’t I ended up rejecting them, so there’s that)

[PeachyPie93]

I used to get rejected often in my school days and had to "prove" I was funny and cool all the time to get people to like me which was annoying. As I got older most people are much nicer to me so it's all good.

[Anonymous]

Not much. But I really don't ask women out. I let them come to me. I did get rejected when I used to ask women out. I really don't understand why more guys don't tale this tact. If a woman knows who she wants to date she should be the one asking men out.

[OneViewpoint]

Maybe 20% of the time. Flip side, I get approached by a lot of women. I have the unpleasant task of rejecting them 95% of the time. I try to do it as kindly as possible.

[RHK36]

When I try, maybe 90-95%. Honestly it's more so a numbers game nowadays. People have more options today because of the apps and social media. More options also means bad options mixed with lack of social skills because of all these new apps being used more often over in person interactions.

[FenixG45]

What is your definition of rejection. I've dated many women, had GFs and a wife. Divorced and relationships ended. I'm STILL single. Is that rejection?

[Asker]

I think there is multiple kinds of rejection, they both kinda work together. The simple rejection is when you approach a woman, and she tells you no. But there is also, what I believe to be quiet rejection. That is when you are around people and you can just tell, "these people don't like me and there is nothing I can do about it" But they don't actually say it in words, but if you try to talk to them, they will just shrug you off.

I think what you describe is an ending rejection. They didn't reject you until they got tired of you. They didn't want you anymore.

[NathanDavis]

I've never been rejected

but I also never ask anyone to accept me

[Anonymous]

95 % only had like 3 stay and I had to leave one cuz I found out he was racist later and one of the others stayed for a year before finding someone irl

[LiamJHayden]

Probably 85% but I cold approach so it is expected.

[Sevenpointfive]

your sheer existence is rejection. everything is out to kill you or hurt your very presence.

[Anonymous]

All of my loves were unrequited, but I've never been rejected because I never asked a girl out, I'm too shy, introverted, and I lack self-confidence.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been rejected many times. I just lick get on with it and move on

[Shiprex]

Not trying so 0%

[Nikki1989]

I have never been rejected.