Who should make the first move in dating, men or women?

Question

I believe both can and should do that

Lliam · Accepted Answer

Either one. There is no "should".

Women often made the first move on me by sending clear signals. At school or work I had girls who made a point of coming around and chatting with me a lot. And, when they did, the way they stood close, looked at me and smiled told me they were interested.
A few girls went further. One gave me a coral necklace that she brought back from her vacation in Hawaii. One gave me a piece of home made pie. One said she just bought a new car and asked if I would like to give it a drive. One told me about the beautiful ashram she attended, asked if I wanted to see it, then drove me there and we had a great time chatting while there and on the drive. One said she just rented a new apartment and asked if I wanted to check it out.
A few of them initiated the first kiss.

But other times, I asked girls out for coffee, lunch or dinner, or to a botanic garden I used to love.

There was one lady who worked at an auto body shop that I had to go to frequently for my job as an automobile claims adjuster. She was always professional and didn't send me any signals. But she was really cute, so one day I asked if I could take her out for dinner.
I was 36 and she turned out to be 30.
We met at a restaurant near the house she rented and got along great. Afterwards, I walked her to her door like a gentleman and put my hand gently around her waist as we walked.
When we got to her door, I stood on the step as she went to unlock it. Then she turned, stepped up to me, looked up into my eyes and put her hands on top of my shoulders. I put my hands on her waist and she rose up on her tip toes, pressed against me, and gave me a tender, lingering kiss.
Long story short, we wound up living together for two years. She was amazing.

When I was 40, I connected with my future wife through a pre-internet dating service in 1994. We met at a restaurant and got along amazingly well.
Afterwards, I walked her to her car in the parking lot out back. After she unlocked her door, she turned, put her hands on top of my shoulders, leaned against me, and gave me a kiss.
Two days later, she called and said some friends had offered her tickets to see the Rolling Stones and Red Hot Chili Peppers at the Rose Bowl. She asked if I was interested.
Of course I was interested.
The thing is, she knew I loved rock music and I knew that she had been a disco girl when she was young and didn't really like or know much about rock music.
But she was interested in me and took the initiative.
As it turned out, we went and had a great time.

LiamJHayden · Accepted Answer

I almost always do, but am not always aware of a girl's interest. So whoever wants to do so of the opportunity will disappear.

Nikki1989 · Accepted Answer

Either can. If you want something or someone, you get off your ass and make it happen. Simple.

MissSunshine2 · Accepted Answer

Both. Usually though, it’s women making men feel like they’re making the first move.

Account · Answer

There is no rule, but I never have.

NathanDavis · Answer

one time... I did approach her first the rest of the times... my exes approached me first and the results were all the same we ended up together, so... either way it works out well in my experience

Pohjolan · Answer

There is no  should  here. Either can make the move though on women there is no pressure to "read the room" before doing so. In part because its rare. Women usually prefer to flirt instead and let the man be the one risking rejection. The issue with that however is them not doing anything what a cockteaser wouldn't either.

Spencer10 · Answer

There is no hard and fast rule in my opinion. Every relationship is unique.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

It's a sociopolitical matter to me. I think the more we slide into conservatism on the spectrum, the more it is valued that men initiate, in order to preserve traditional roles and functions.

exitseven · Answer

I was really shy around girls and could have used a little nudge.

msc545 · Answer

Whoever is interested, the old idea that men should always make the first move is horribly disadvantageous to men.

HighValue · Answer

Women should, otherwise they need to get laws changed and women need to be in prison for false accusations and sued every time. Until then, it is women's fault so they should be the ones taking the initiative.

beenherebefore · Answer

Both can do it but I prefer when the Man is the one to make the first move.

Anonymous · Answer

Woman of course, if the man is too shy.  If not, than man should. Unless she really likes to take initiative.

lilBigPotato · Answer

Whoever feels like it.

Anonymous · Answer

more than likely it will normally always be on the guy for all eternity whether we like it or not

LC75LC71 · Answer

Men. Even before dating like asking her out.

Happyman1234 · Answer

It's an unwritten rule in relationships that the first step should come from the man.

Abbycado · Answer

Either works.

Staximus · Answer

Whoever wants to

loveyouoak · Answer

Men.

Sweetdreams1950 · Answer

Man.

Who should make the first move in dating, men or women?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Who should decide where to go on a first date: man or woman?

Who should make the first move in dating, men or women?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Who should decide where to go on a first date: man or woman?

We're glad to see you liked this post.