Girl rejects a kiss, now what?

[Anonymous]

I feel awkward. We had a great first date and I felt like I should give it a try. We hugged and I tried for the kiss but she said "no not yet". I text her afterward saying I had fun and whatever and that we should go out again if she wants and she responded and said she had a great time also and will see what her schedule looks like next week. I said I'd call her sometime to see and she said that sounds good.

But what am I supposed to think? Isn't no kiss = no interest? And how am I supposed to get my first kiss then? I don't want to try too soon and get rejected again but I don't want to wait forever just for a first kiss to know I am doing things right...how long should I wait to try again?

Have any girls here said no to a kiss the first time but actually gone though and gotten in a relationship with that same guy?

[Konnour]

Man, you're in a deep sh*t!

This seems like a classic - the date goes perfect but no kiss.

Some women tend to date even those men they ain't attracted to because for them it's more fun than just sitting at home alone, and especially - if the guy covers the expenses.

If she would like you then there would be no reason at all why she wouldn't kiss you.

Name one reason why a woman who is attracted to you would not even kiss you after a great first date. I really wanna hear something.

Yes - there is an unwritten rule "no sex on a first date" as it may compromise their female dignity, but it definitely does not apply about kissing. It's ridiculous!

You know what you have to do? Find another chick.

Forget about this one and don't even consider asking her out again - because then you would compromise your male dignity!

Why should you do that? If you can find a girl who's much better?

She sorted her priorities and you're not on the top of them so you must not put her on the top of your priority list.

If she again may ask you out sometime - then consider it and maybe accept, but just maybe, and in such case don't spend a penny for her.

[Asker]

But then why are all the girls saying it's no biggie? And even half the guys say it's no problem? If she says yes to a second date, why wouldn't that mean she is interested? Afterwards we texted and she said she had a great time...

[Konnour]

Girls are either frigid, religious or scared of getting close and guys usually lack assertiveness to stand for their interests.

This is why so many lads are whipped - they are afraid to stand for themselves.

You suffered rejection. It's nothing else than that. Why should you lose all your pride and expose yourself vulnerable to her again?

[Konnour]

Oh.. and I guess you're not desperate to chase one chick who's not even really reciprocating?

Of course she may want dates with you again.. as a friend.. as someone who covers the bill!

But not as someone she's interested in. Because no sane girl would turn down a guy in any way if she's really interested.

[Asker]

Me and her only met a few days ago and she may have just been nervous. You seem to be super negative about it... Look at the girl up on top...she said she wouldn't kiss the guy no matter how interested she was. I highly doubt she is lying to me. The girl told me "not yet". She didn't say "umm...no". Key word: yet. Doesn't that make sense or am I just crazy? And I doubt there are many girls that would go out on a second date just for free food. And this girl seems down to earth

[Konnour]

I understand you are interested in her, but you gotta realize this is about power.

You are providing her power by giving in. Let's say everything's fine after the second date and you wonder what the hell that moron here was talking about.

But make a guess - who's gonna hold the leadership role in that relationship?

[Lolylola]

Dude this is totally wrong and I'll tell you why! You shouldn't be applying this on every girl. The reason I'm here is because this thing happened with me just yesterday, I went on a date with this guy that found so attractive and I literally felt butterflies in my stomach, thing that I haven't feel since probably high school, we had a great time, before dinner we had drinks that I paid for, and then I wanted to share the dinner bill cause it was darn expensive and I was the one that chose the restaurant so I didn't wanna feel like I did that on purpose, he didn't let me but I insisted (so he didn't pay for my meal) after dinner we walked and he held my hand which I enjoyed, arriving to my car he hugs me and tried to kiss but turned my head towards his chest and hugged him. It was kind of awkward then he left quickly. Now the reason I did that is because I liked him so much and felt a huge and wanted more with this guy cause I thought he might be worth it

[Lolylola]

But I come from a kind of conservative background, and also won't share my saliva with a guy I just met even though I like him, maybe other girls other different I don't know these are jjust my personal thoughts

[MikeK]

Was it a kiss on the lips or cheek?

If it was a cheek - nothing wrong with that at all

If it was on lips - still not bad but a prude might think otherwise...

I can't believe these twits on here saying "I don't kiss on the 1st date"... GROW UP

The girls have it wrong on this one man... if she rejects kiss - DUMP HER! DUMP HER! No question.

...and you NEVER ask for a kiss - you just do it! Talk about killing the romance :P

[Asker]

But it was only our first date and we have only known each other for like four days. It was for the lips but isn't there a good chance she just was nervous about it? If she wants to go out for a second date, wouldn't that mean she likes me and just was shy about the kiss on the first date?

[MikeK]

Hmm... I'm still gonna say no.

Frankly, life is too short to resist each other. If this girl REALLY wanted to be with you, she would at least wanted some kind of intimacy and not have shunned you the way that she did. I mean, come on, how old is this girl; 8?

[Asker]

We hugged if that counts for "intimacy"?

[MikeK]

Sure it does...

[Skittles_lover]

From just reading some of your responses to the other answers you seem to eager to get the kiss. Relax =) it'll happen k? You obviously didn't run her away if she is willing to check her schedule to see you again. She likes you, probably just wants to know who she is actually kissing (the person on the inside) before she just does it. I know you're stuck in the position of now wondering when to try again but maybe just try date 3 to be safe.

[SkinnyG]

Act like nothing happened and go out with her again. She probably just wants to get to know you better and see if she's interested in you that way. I'd wait maybe through one more date and see how it goes and then maybe on the third date - but only if it seems like she really likes you.

I wouldn't take that as a no interest if she's giving you an indication that she wants to see you again.

[Asker]

She may have interest in "hanging out" but not getting into a relationship. That's at least how I take the no kiss. If she really did like me, why would she reject the kiss?

[SkinnyG]

She just may want to take things slowly and get to know you better before she seals the deal. Honestly though, I wouldn't take it as a rejection.

[Skylar-lewis]

Its nothing personal, girls just have rules, ever heard of the 5 date rule? & you have to remember it was the 1st date, she's just getting to know you and probably doesn't want to give you the wrong idea (a kiss on date 1, sex on date 2) In the future when you take her out let her initiate , that way she doesn't feel uncomfortable

[Asker]

But a lot of the time girls will not initiate at all so it's up to the guy. And then I'm going to be stuck in that position of going for the kiss again. Alright, so how about this then...what if I try to time our third date to be on Valentine's day. If she rejects the first kiss on v-day something has to be wrong, right? And on the second date I will just end with a big hug and a smile unless she does something else.

[Skylar-lewis]

your right some girls won't take the 1st step, your plan sounds good just make sure somewhere in there you let her know that you really like her. And you need to remember there's nothing wrong if rejects the kiss but goes for another date.shes just not ready

[FierceMegan2]

WIth this girl, I suggest you ask to kiss her before you do it again. Just saying, "May I kiss you?", "Can I kiss you?" is the best way to approach it the second time around.

Every girl is different, and they do different things with different guys based on the way they feel. Don't take it to heart; she probably just wasn't ready for a kiss. It doesn't mean she is not interested.

[CamTheAwesome]

Dude, it's simple. You don't kiss on the first date. Makes you seem easy. Go again for the kiss on the secoound or third. Or you can wait for her to give you the okay. Don't even go for a kiss the next time around,just hug her and go. If she has a "what the heck" kinda look on her face then from there kiss her.

[Asker]

It seems ridiculous to wait until the third date just for a kiss. Continue at that rate and we might be making out by our 30th date...

[CamTheAwesome]

I'm sorry things are moving so slow. Best thing I can tell is try again and if nothing move on. Does sound crazy to let a person go over not kissing, but you gotta do what you gotta.

[Asker]

No I do like her so I'm not going away. But I just don't want to be here forever for something that may not work out. I meant for it to mean that if I wait forever just to get solid signs she likes me(i.e. the first kiss, making out, ect), I'm going to be wasting a lot of time and money on something that might not work out.

[CamTheAwesome]

Then be blunt, and ask her. "Do you like me?"

[DS4L_]

NO KISSING ON A FIRST DATE! I don't think it's you. If she goes on the second date, then it was just the golden rule kicking in. :)

[Asker]

But if she was interested, why wouldn't she kiss when I went for it? To me it seems like she isn't attracted because of that. And she may say yes to a second date, but if she isn't attracted, aren't I just wasting my time?

[DS4L_]

I wouldn't kiss on a first date no matter how attracted I was. :/ Unless the relationship started because of a kiss..

[Lolylola]

Well said, and sometimes when girls are so attracted and want something more serious they wouldn't kiss on the first date

[cookiemonster12]

Ask her out on another date. I don't kiss on the first date either. It doesn't mean I'm not interested, it's that I don't want his mouth on me so early!

[Asker]

It's just a kiss though! It's not like your signing a contract that you are getting into a relationship with him. Just a kiss to show you enjoyed the night...shouldn't be that hard. I mean now I'm sitting her wondering if she sees me as relationship material or just a friend.

[cookiemonster12]

Well, it's just something I don't do. I know a lot of girls who don't do that on the first date. I've noticed that whenever I kiss a guy on the first date we have sex earlier, and I think kissing earlier in the relationship sets you up for that. Not that I have anything against sex, but maybe she's not interested in that kind of relationship yet.

[Hyrule]

Maybe she just thought a kiss on the first date was too soon. That doesn't mean she isn't interested. ^^

[Asker]

Why are all the other guys saying she isn't interested but you say she still could be? If she was really attracted to me, wouldn't she have done the kiss? idk...

[Hyrule]

Well like I said, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you. Perhaps she wasn't ready for it.

[Lolylola]

Dude us girls control ourselves when we want something serious I wouldn't kiss on a first date if I like the guy and see that he's got potential!! Simply because I like him that much and don't want him to think I'm an easy girl

[Anonymous]

Just go to a gay bar and wave your c.o.c.k around you will have success, you can skip the names and go all the way, sounds like its all for you!

[Asker]

I bet your life is as sh*tty as your answer.

[Opinion Owner]

No you

[Asker]

Learn English dumbf***.

[Opinion Owner]

no u

[jimmy217]

no worries man. Just wait it will happen. Why rush it. And no kiss doesn't mean no interest

[Anonymous]

My grand daddy has more game than you, your hopeless. You sound like a twink anyways, good luck on getting it up the ass, I agree with the other anon.

[Asker]

You're probably the same anon on a different account. Just because I didn't find a slut doesn't mean I don't have "game". Your logic is just as bad as the other anon's grammar. You guys would be great together--maybe take his idea and go out to the gay bar with him because I'm sure you'd get along great.

[Asker]

And wouldn't you rather get in a relationship with a girl that has morals? You would be stupid to say no, because she would cheat on you in a heartbeat with the black guy on your block.

[Lostsouldier]

Sounds to me like she's not interested but doesn't have the balls to tell you, common problem with women sorry dude.

[Asker]

Then why would she text me after saying she had a great time and will "see what's going on in my(meaning her) busy schedule next week :p"?

[Lostsouldier]

She telling you that in a week she might have time to see you agian I understand you are young but is it really that hard to see the signs.

[Asker]

Lets reword my question...if she really isn't interested, why would she say what she said?

[Lostsouldier]

Woman are a strange beast honestly from what you said it sounds to me like she's not interested and is trying to spare your feelings. Then again I got no idea I could be dead wrong, just my impression.

[Asker]

If she says yes to a second date, what would you then think? Would you then think she is interested?