I am sorry to only write someting about this now but I have been incredibly busy with fixing my life. I have one week of school left and need to make sure that I get very good grades - I should be left with an average grade of between 1.1 and 1.3, we will see. 1 is the best grade here and 5 is the worst - I have all ones and two twos (in Mathematics and French, each due to extreme anxiety during tests).
This is all relevant because all of a sudden I am in a situation where I will apply to German and Austrian universities outside of my hometown for my Bachelor's degree already. I am aiming to get into RWTH Aachen, but my chances are very slim because they only take 40 people for their Bachelor in Computer Science each year. If I get in, I'll move there in an instant because it will be easier to get into ETH Zürich afterwards for my Masters/PhD.
My parents kicked me out of their house. I will be gone by September. They have offered to give me money for basic stuff - rent, food and books - but I will not be able to go on holiday, save money etc. and my standard of living will decrease significantly. I should mention that I always knew that my standard of living would go down when I moved out.
I currently have the privilege to live in a house with a nice, green garden. I am surrounded by mountains and the air and water quality is amazing. I'd need a water filter in Aachen. I'd be surrounded by Braunkohlewerke as someone who values organic, tasty food and sustainability very much. It's paradox to me but I'd fit in somehow.
How I'm doing
I'm really tired right now because my life changed within a few hours but I also cannot wait to become more independent. I've been trying to keep it together for the entire week but to be honest the situation just is stressful and that's fine.
Nobody wants to be kicked out.
I already had a conversation with my therapist about all of this and she believes in me. It'll all be fine but it will definitely be difficult. Especially because I will have to live an incredibly frugal lifestyle, which is somehing I am not accustomed to. I am used to being able to ask my dad to order stuff on Amazon, no matter how expensive they are. That will change dramatically but this is easy to eradicate. I will cut out all luxury of my life, not go on holidays and just try to save money through working small jobs on the side.
I'd love to hear some advice if someone experienced a similar situation!