When working on yourself ,& you’ve cut all negativity out of your life, what does working on yourself even mean? where do I start?

[Anonymous]

Updates

1 y

The thought of having a man right now is like drinking milk sour lol, I don’t wanna do that right now to be honest. I just don’t really know when I’ll be happy or adapt to my new life

[wheresmrcunnunglis]

First off, congratulations to you for choosing to work on yourself to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

As you are on your self-improvement journey, DO keep in mind that self-improvement truly never ends, so, do not let your goal of improving yourself stop you from seeking the relationships you desire or need under the notion that, " I'm still not ready" As you will never truly know you're ready until you put yourself out there again. Still, one indicator of knowing when you do, is if you can identify AND act on when someone is doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable ( this is the "identify" part) and speak up about it ( this is the "act on it"part ).

Working on yourself, to me, means taking the time to understand what most of ones triggers are, what their flaws are, what their strengths are, what one is passionate about, and the general direction one wants to take their life in and actively pursue it. The points I shared in my previous sentences regarding what I define as, "working on yourself" can also serve as a good starting point for you. As I feel, from there you will be able to build off of that foundation and ask yourself more in-depth questions for yourself to answer that pertain to you specifically in your life.

Wishing you the best on your self-improvement journey and do remember to take it one day at a time, dont shame yourself when you see yourself falling into bad habits again. But most importantly, don't use your "self-improvement journey " as a crutch to refrain from getting back out there, after a while that is, when it comes to cultivating platonic or romantic relationships that you may want to pursue. 🤗

[Asker]

Wow I really enjoyed on reading your answer, it hit every angle I had thought of before I had posted! Thank you so much!

[wheresmrcunnunglis]

My pleasure 😊

[Chris_Chambers0010]

It just depends what things you want to improve about yourself before you start your next relationship. Man be you feel that you're ready right now?

[Asker]

No, I just started my journey of working on myself for about a month now. But, like I told the other person who commented i through myself into things just to occupy my time but I’m not happy with it , I’m still not happy

[Chris_Chambers0010]

Well for me the whole concept of getting rid of the negative people in my life, was to hopefully replace them with friends that I have more in common with. Friends that add something to my life rather than old drinking buddies who just hang around and slow down my progress in life.
I wanted to actually choose my friends for once rather than people just hanging around me, or trying to use me. So that's my goal. I want to get healthy and build a new social circle that I can hopefully thrive in and meet people that will genuinely interest me.

[Asker]

You read my mind

[Asker]

That is so relatable

[Chris_Chambers0010]

Oh nice.
Well I hope we both find happiness and friends that will add some joy to our lives.
I was raising a kid for the last 14 years so my social life hasn't been a priority, but now that I have more time I want to meet new people.
Good luck in your journey.

[Rendomlikua]

It depends about what you want improve about yourself

[UniquelyBasic]

Exercise, doing activities you enjoy,

[Asker]

I do, through myself in therapy, the gym, tanning, my job, guitar lessons. But, I’m still lonely. When does all this feel normal or even “happy”

[UniquelyBasic]

Maybe you crave a partner