The Objective Top 10 Best Movies Ever

[OfDeath]

Debates over the best movies rage in an unceasing squabble between dorks and poindexters into perpetuity. That’s why I’m using my authority to finally put an end to the debate and reveal what the 10 objectively best movies actually are.

Film critics whether amateur or professional and keyboard warriors of any kind need not waste their phalangal dexterity with emotionally charged objections as they are futile. Acceptance of fact is the only justifiably rational way to take in this list.

just kidding. This is my opinion and my opinion alone. Actually, it isn’t even the final 10 best movies even in my opinion, there will be others I like more which come to mind later that I just didn’t remember at the time of writing.

Nevertheless and without further ado, here are the objective best movies of all time in no particular order.

1. Falling down (1993)

Anyone who has experienced life identifies with this movie.

2. Batman (1989)

The movie all subsequent superhero movies have tried to emulate and failed in the most spectacularly miserable fashion. A pioneering masterpiece with no equal in its genre.

3. Oliver! (1968)

This is not just a kids movie and a musical but also a thriller. That is hard to pull off but this picks the proverbial pocket. Every joker who ever saw this has done their own Oliver impression to ask for more food.

4. Walk Hard (2007)

One of the stupidest movies ever made but acted so brilliantly by its star that it doesn’t just work, it makes for the funniest musical comedy of all time. A brilliant story that sends up multiple generations.

5. John Wick (2014)

The first one. The others are all pretty much the same movie but without a proper conclusion. This movie comes across as serious but it is actually taking the piss out of the whole tough guy action genre. Michael Niqvist’s character’s resignation to the fact his son will be murdered by Wick yet still does his best to stave off the inevitable is one of the funniest performances of a movie villain I’ve ever seen.

6. Loaded Weapon 1 (1993)

It seems 1993 was a good year for movies. Head and Shoulders shampoo owes the entirety of its success to this movie and I take butt in the moonlight strolls at every opportunity. Just let that sink in and marvel at the comedic genius of this film.

7. Vegas Vacation (1997)

I had never even heard of Wayne Newton until I saw this and nobody else had either. But aside from that fact, this movie is relatable in so many ways. No other film conveys the dilemma of the human condition so well and sends it up with such self depreciation. It’s subliminal but it’s there.

8. Escape From Alcatraz (1979)

The Shawshank Redemption was just Stephen King trying to copy this. Clint Eastwood squints his way out prison in a gripping slow burn loosely based on the truth. I mean what do you want from me? Seriously.

9. The Shining (1980)

Speaking of Stephen King, this time it was his idea being done by someone else. But the someone else did it better. Stan Kubrick’s take on this story and casting of Jack Nicholson whose second appearance in this list is no fluke, produced one of the eeriest portrayals of descent to madness in the history of film.

10. The Big Lebowski (1998)

Don’t agree? Well that’s just like your opinion. Fucking fascist. We know this is your homework and I would like my undies back. I’m staying. I’m finishing my coffee. Enjoying my coffee

[abc3643]

You need to see more movies. Only one of those movies is at least 50 years old.

Reading that list is like reading a kindergartner make a list of "The 10 best brands of paste to eat."

Consider reviewing these lists made every 10 years. Since 1952, near the end of every year ending in 2, "Sight and Sound" magazine published by the British Film Institute seeks the opinions of movie critics and, since 1992, directors for the best films of all time and published their "Sight and Sound Poll of the Greatest Films of All Time".

Here are the 2022 winners:

In 1952, the Sight and Sound team had the novel idea of asking critics to name the greatest films of all time. The tradition became decennial, increasing in size and prestige as the decades passed.

The Sight and Sound poll is now a major bellwether of critical opinion on cinema and this year’s edition (its eighth) is the largest ever, with 1,639 participating critics, programmers, curators, archivists and academics each submitting their top ten ballot.

This is the 2022 Critics Top 20:

The Critics’ top 20 Greatest Films of All Time
1,639 voters
1. Jeanne Dielman, 23, quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxelles (Chantal Akerman, 1975)
2. Vertigo (Alfred Hitchcock, 1958)
3. Citizen Kane (Orson Welles, 1941)
4. Tokyo Story (Yasujiro Ozu, 1953)
5. In the Mood for Love (Wong Kar-wai, 2001)
6. 2001: A Space Odyssey (Stanley Kubrick, 1968)
7. Beau travail (Claire Denis, 1998)
8. Mulholland Dr. (David Lynch, 2001)
9. Man with a Movie Camera (Dziga Vertov,1929)
10. Singin’ in the Rain (Stanley Donen and Gene Kelly, 1951)
11. Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans (F. W. Murnau, 1927)
12. The Godfather (Francis Ford Coppola, 1972)
13. La Règle du jeu (Jean Renoir, 1939)
14. Cléo from 5 to 7 (Agnès Varda, 1962)
15. The Searchers (John Ford, 1956)
16. Meshes of the Afternoon (Maya Deren and Alexander Hammid, 1943)
17. Close-Up (Abbas Kiarostami, 1989)
18. Persona (Ingmar Bergman, 1966)
19. Apocalypse Now (Francis Ford Coppola, 1979)
20. Seven Samurai (Akira Kurosawa, 1954)

This is the 2022 Directors' Top 20 (*):480 voters
1. 2001: A Space Odyssey (Stanley Kubrick, 1968)
2. Citizen Kane (Orson Welles, 1941)
3. The Godfather (Francis Ford Coppola, 1972)
4. Jeanne Dielman, 23, quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxelles (Chantal Akerman, 1975)
4. Tokyo Story (Yasujiro Ozu, 1953)
6. Vertigo (Alfred Hitchcock, 1958)
6. 8½ (Frederico Fellini, 1963)
8. Mirror (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1975)
9. In the Mood for Love (Wong Kar-wai, 2001)
9. Close-Up (Abbas Kiarostami, 1989)
9. Persona (Ingmar Bergman, 1966)
12. Taxi Driver (Martin Scorcese, 1976)
12. Barry Lyndon (Stanley Kubrick, 1975)
14. Beau travail (Claire Denis, 1998)
14. Seven Samurai (Akira Kurosawa, 1954)
14. À bout de souffle (Jean-Luc Goddard, 1960)
14. Stalker (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1979)
18. Apocalypse Now (Francis Ford Coppola, 1979)
18. A Woman Under the Influence (John Cassavetes, 1975)
20. Bicycle Thieves (Vittorio De Sica, 1948)
20. Roshomon (Akira Kurosawa, 1950)

(*) There are 21 because the last 2 were tied. In fact, there are several ties.

======

So, notice how many of these films are on both lists -12 films appear on both lists. You should consider watching them before you render your "objective" opinion.

Before he passed away in 2013, since 1972, film critic Roger Ebert would submit his selection of the Ten Best to Sight and Sound. This is Roger's 2002 list (he does them in alphabetical order)...

https://www.rogerebert.com/roger-ebert/the-greatest-films-of-all-time

I am faced once again with the task of voting in Sight & Sound magazine's famous poll to determine the greatest films of all time. Apart from my annual year's best lists, this is the only list I vote in. It is a challenge. After voting in 1972, 1982, and 1992, I came up with these ten titles in 2002:

"Aguirre, Wrath of God" (Herzog)
"Apocalypse Now" (Coppola)
"Citizen Kane" (Welles)
"Dekalog" (Kieslowski)
"La Dolce Vita" (Fellini)
"The General" (1927) (Keaton)
"Raging Bull" (Scorsese)
"2001: A Space Odyssey" (Kubrick)
"Tokyo Story" (Ozu)
"Vertigo" (Hitchcock)

He changed it in 2012 in response to 2011's "Tree of Life" by Terrence Malick. For some people, that might be a difficult or boring film. To me, it was fascinating.

"Aguirre, Wrath of God" (Herzog)
"Apocalypse Now" (Coppola)
"Citizen Kane" (Welles)
"La Dolce Vita" (Fellini)
"The General" (1927) (Keaton)
"Raging Bull" (Scorsese)
"2001: A Space Odyssey" (Kubrick)
"Tokyo Story" (Ozu)
"The Tree of Life" (Malick)
"Vertigo" (Hitchcock)

[OfDeath]

I have seen most of those. These movies are better in my opinion.

I’m fine with your remark about my list being akin to a kindergartener’s list of best pastes. Even though it was meant as a spurnful remark, I laughed.

I am young at heart.

[abc3643]

I have to admit that "Falling Down" is a guilty pleasure of mine. I am not 100% sure, but I do believe that I saw it in theaters when it came out in 1993. In fact, at the time, I was living in the Los Angeles area and working in the defense industry just like "D-FENS", the Michael Douglas character. Despite my liberal tendencies, I empathized greatly with that character and understood why that character foreshadowed the ascendency of Trump. In that sense, that movie was ahead of its time; it really was a foreshadow of things to come and I believed it even then.

[abc3643]

www.rogerebert.com/reviews/falling-down-1993

[Chandelier8]

Good movies, similar to what you'd watch in a film studies class. No list is complete without a coen brothers movie. I'd put the last two mentioned, on that list. The Shining and the Big Lebowski or No Country for Old Men (I actually think No Country it's a better movie).

[EnglishArtsteacher]

My opinions.

I guess I'm the only person in world who doesn't like The Big Lebowski.

National Lampoon's Vegas Vacation is great, but it's not even in the best movie in the Vacation series, let alone a top ten movie of all time.

For the record, Stephen King wrote the novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption(which is what The Shawshank Redemption was based on) before Escape From Alcatraz was released. For all we know, he did base his novella on the actual real life Alcatraz escape, but he couldn't have based it on the movie.

The Shining(1980) is one of the best horror movies of all time, and it's definitely worthy of this list.

I haven't seen any of the other movies on this list.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

Minor correction: National Lampoon didn't sponsor "Vegas Vacation", my mistake.

[OfDeath]

Come on man King freely admits that he writes 10 pages a day and pumps out drafts in under 3 months. The novella was published 3 years after Escape From Alcatraz came out. King can say he wrote it before, but he is full of it. He just doesn’t want to admit that he got inspiration from a Clint Eastwood movie.

What is it about the Big Lebowski that you don’t like?

[EnglishArtsteacher]

"Escape From Alcatraz" is based on a true story, so why would Stephen King need to wait for the movie to be released to seal ideas from the REAL LIFE escape? He most likely DID steal ideas from the actual escape in real life, but I doubt he waited for the movie to be released.

As for "The Big Lebowski", I just found nothing interesting about it at all. I didn't like the plot, I didn't find it funny, and the acting wasn't anything mind-blowing.

[OfDeath]

He probably saw the film like many others. With the time frames. It could’ve even come on TV before he wrote his book.

Regarding the Big Lebowski, you are clearly just out of your element and have no frame of reference in regard to the intent of the film. It is an absurdist comedy. Every single thing about it is meant to be tongue in cheek. That is the mastery of the film. It is perhaps the best movie ever made in that regard. It isn’t uncommon for the more intellectual comedies to be misunderstood. In regard to the acting, you are obviously not a golfer. That movie has one of the most experienced casts of any movie ever made. Not exactly a light weight. The acting leaves nothing to be desired. An opinion formed from misinterpretation isn’t valid.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

Like I said, "Escape From Alcatraz" is based on a true story, so I don't know why Stephen King would need to wait for the corresponding movie to be released.

As for "The Big Lebowski", I'm well aware it has one of the most experienced casts of any movie. I never said anything about experience. That's one reason why I was disappointed with the acting. I just didn't find it intriguing, and it wasn't impressive to me. The move may have been more comedic than I can remember (I haven't seen it in nearly ten years), but I can't remember one funny part of the movie, even if it's more "intellectual" humor.

[OfDeath]

Yes I read that. The implication was King was inspired by seeing the movie whether or not he knew about the true story the film was loosely based on.

You are clearly out of your element in regard to The Big Lebowski.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

Regarding "The Big Lebowski", your reaction isn't a surprise. Almost everyone I know thinks I'm crazy just because I don't like that movie.

[rachel776]

there is no objective way of determining this, it's all personal taste no matter how academic or intellectual or statistical or sadistical 🤷‍♀️

[PinkSmoke]

Nice

[QnAKing]

Great movie list, I agree great movies but maybe not of all time...

[OfDeath]

I also remembered 2 movies which deserve to be on my list. The Serpent and the Rainbow and The Last King of Scotland were also great thrillers.

[Likes2drive]

Interesting pick of movies, I’ve seen most of them especially the old ones , I liked most of them

[OfDeath]

Yeah the old ones are still the best if you ask me

[Likes2drive]

No new ideas with the new ones

[AngryCarl2]

Firstly this is demonstrably wrong because The Godfather isn't even on the list. Secondly the best movie on your list is The Big Lebowski so why is it No.10?

The good news is, you need to watch more movies.

[OfDeath]

They are in no particular order. The godfather was ok but it is too serious for my liking. And that comes from someone who actually liked the Godfather 3. In fact, I liked it because I found the way he dies at the end comical

[NathanDavis]

where's Sharknado though...

[OfDeath]

I would personally recommend House Shark instead.

[strateguy632]

tnx for recommendations