Why does my step mom hate me so much?

[Anonymous]

My dad remarried a couple of years ago and ever since then my step mom hated me. I've always tried my best to impress her and help out with my half sister but everything i do always back fires. like today i watched the baby from the seccond i woke um to ligit the minute she fell asleep. but still nothing. my step mother has 2 other children. she screams at them all the time. like today one of the girls hit the other. the one that got hit stormed upstairs and told her mom. she started screaming her head off saying your all at fault. she called me a whore and a bitch and many other offensive names. she said in older and i should be the one takeing responsibility for everything. she said im a shedevil that dirtyed her kids mind and made them behave like that. she said im a spoiled pain in the ass brat. but ligit she is the one always yelling she took over my grandmas house made it a mess and makes my grandma do the work. my grandma works nights at a bank and babysits the baby until she has to work from the seccond she wakes up when im not here. the house is constantly a mess and my grandma and i are the only ones who clean it. i live with my mom and visit here one month a year from jearsy. i dont want to visit but i have no idea how much time i have left with my grandparent and family. I've tried everything from jokes, cleaning the entire house, and babysitting the baby. she just still plain out hates me. she told me to tell her if her kids do anythig wrong but i can't do it because she will yell at me and say i have flaws too or something. i stood up to her last year and it was a disaster it was the first time i cried infront of my dad since i was 3. she said u always run to ur grandpa as soon as things get ruff.(grandpa from my moms side of the family) she always says she is the inoccent one and the target. she wacked her own kid with a plastic spoon now she has black and blue on the spot she was hit. what do i do?

[Candy12345]

They're not your kids, stop taking care of them, First of all. Tell her she's not your mother and that she can't tell you what to do. tell your dad how she makes you feel.

Also, don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. If I had a stepmother and she treated me like that... I'd tell her to fuck off and straighten out her own damn kids cause they learn all their bad behaviour from her. They're her kids after all. I'd tell her that since she gave birth to them that she needs to take care of them herself. I would tell her that she's jealous of me and I would really try to hurt her with my words and make them hit home. And if she tried to dicipline me I would spit in her face and tell her that she's not my fucking mother and that she never will be. I'd tell her I'm don't with her shit and that I'm not listening to her any longer.

[Candy12345]

Done* not don't

[Candy12345]

Also, this sounds like abuse and you can report her to the authorities.

[Queen_naki5]

That's verbal/emotional abuse. You need to record her one day when she is saying all of these things and talk to a counselor about it. Get her into hot water. There's no reason why she needs to mistreat you that way. You didn't do anything to her, simply because you remind her of your fathers' ex maybe? Still, it's no reason for her to call you all of those hurtful names. Have you told your father? If he even condones this, he has issues and may need to get his head checked. For the time being, ignore her. She sounds like a spiteful woman full of resentment. Stay away from her and know that what she's saying is wrong and she will pay a price for her actions towards you. Good luck.

[peachblossomluck]

You need to tell a trusted adult. This is possibly child abuse and elder abuse both which are quite illegal! She's a spiteful woman with mental problems. Your father may be too deep in denial to deal with the problem in a fair and timely manner. Perhaps your stepmother needs the law to straighten her out.

[YusiBear]

Firstly I know you're only 14 but that's no excuse for not using paragraphs! Seriously I had difficulty reading this but I did because I'm here to help!

Secondly have you never seen Cinderella? That's basically you, step mom's are always evil! Basic fact!
Ok maybe not all step mothers...

Thirdly tell someone how she treats you, whether that's your parents or grandparents.
If for example your father doesn't believe you, maybe you can record her calling you those bad names. But don't blackmail her with it. Show it to your dad.

But have you told anyone?

[Asker]

I have my mom said let's not go to co next year. But my grandparents are getting old my moms mom is having issues with her health and I don't know how much time I have left with her. so I don't know what to do

[YusiBear]

I'm confused, who does your grandparents live with?

[coolbreeze]

I think it sucks. I also think since your young its not to much you can do about it. The way she treats you isn't right. If it was me I would remain low key around her and I would try to stay out of her way. Thats good that you clean up and stuff and help out. She has no right to call you names. She does these things because you are not her real daughter. Just do the best you can.

[Anonymous]

Dear Katie,

I know how you feel. I myself had a horrible relationship with my stepmother for over 10 years and my self-esteem was absolutely reduced to ashes because of her. I was only a child and she pretty much hated me because I was a talking, walking reminder that my father had another woman in this world which was not her. Your stepmother probably feels the same about you.

My question is: where the hell is your father in the middle of all this? Doesn't he see what is happening? How does he allow this to happen? I am sorry but my father was also silent about the way I was mistreated and 15 years later I still resent him. Speak seriously to your father first about this abuse. IT IS ABUSE. I agree with the girls in these comments when they say you should try to record that behavior somehow. I know it hurts because you do not know how much time left you have with your family, but your sanity and your health should also come first.

[creepycreeper]

Oh my god, she left a bruise with a plastic spoon? How horrible! I hope the kid survives.

https://i61.tinypic.com/122feja.jpg

[Asker]

She ligit can't say a word without screaming or calling others names. I haven't seen my aunt since she was my dads wife because she hates her.

[creepycreeper]

Well you can't choose your family so I don't know what to tell you other than try not to escalate things further.

[Alohaloli]

She is the one with the problem she needs to grow up

[CityBoy773]

DCFS exists, cause sounds like she's just plain abusive.