Why do some people abandon their friends when they get a boyfriend/girlfriend?

[So-Innocent]

Or spend significantly less time with them than they used to?

Has a friend ever done this to you?

If so, were you hurt or were you understanding?

Is it difficult to maintain friends and a relationship with gf/bf?

[Anonymous]

A lot of people do that, girls and guys alike. It's not a very healthy thing to do either. Because what ends up happening is you alienate all of your other friends for ONE person - a boyfriend or girlfriend, and more than likely the relationship will end, then you'll be left with no one.

It's important to keep your bonds and relationships strong with friends and family while in a relationship so you always have a support system there for you. To make your boyfriend or girlfriend your entire universe is stupid, because when the relationship ends you'll be left with no one and devastated and take the break-up that much harder because you feel so alone.

My sister did it with her first and ex-boyfriend. She didn't know any better, and now she does.

Maintaining a good, healthy relationship with a romantic partner is all about balance - in every aspect.

Good luck.

[cheerclover27]

I hate hate hate when people do that. I think a lot of people don't know the right balance between hanging out with friends and their boyfriend/girlfriend. And once the relationship fizzles out, then the friend has alienated all of their friendships and they're left in a sticky situation. I've had one friend do this to me before, and it brought us really far apart. But, for the most part, all my friends are really level headed and split up time between their boyfriends/girlfriends and friends really wisely, we usually end up all hanging out together. It's all about finding balance.

[coolkid101]

I agree with you,

[misio]

yah its happened...i've done it...i mean when my friends do that I understand...i mean cause I've done it before...and well it's cause we get to caught up in the relationship,that all we wanna do is be with our boyfriends...like girls love to be loved...so they spend time with their boyfriends as much as possible to feel that way.. get me? but I mean we still care about our friends and such...but like...if they barely got together let them hve some time together...and than if it continues confront your friend about it :) hope I was any help :)

[coolkid101]

, I hate when that happens, once my best friend like really close friend did tht to me, we used to be really close like go to the mall, whach movies sometimes go to clubs, and then he was in a reletionship with my other best friend, and he never talked to me again, and every time I used to tlk to his girl(my friend) he used to think that I was trying to steal her, like why would I do that, he's like my best friend I would never hurt him, but he doesn't think the same about me anymore, he got people to beat me up because of tht and I had to tlk to his girl secretly and it got way outt of control but I miss him like crazy :(

[stercor]

The problem is wanting to spend more time with the new love.

Another view is that the boyfriend/girlfriend is jealous. This has a limited life span.

The boyfriend/girlfriend must understand that there are prior healthy relationships with others and respect that. And the subject should try to include her in his relationships with others so she doesn't get jealous.

[dreamtime]

Nope, never really happened to me, well not my close friends anyway.

Obviously I saw them less when they are in a relationship but we still hung out, we still had our chats, we still txt'd/called.

[kidblue]

yea some of my friends have done this to me before...some of the time I was kinda hurt, but other times I could understand

[snackeyg]

I can't stand when friends do that. Hate to say it though but with my first Girlfriend I could see myself doing it, but that's because it's my first so it's exciting and seems more important to me.

[Anonymous]

i also have the same question...! 2 of my frds have done this to me!...n I hate them!

[wt150]

same here at 1st the girlfriend was nice now I hate the both of them especially my former best friend because I was involved in the picture way the f*** before she showed up and he litterally sacked all of his close friends to be with her