Would it be wrong to have a second child just for the sake that when I die, my current child isn’t alone?

Question

abc3643 · Accepted Answer

Yes, it's wrong... and a bit stupid.

When you die, chances are it will be when you are old and a grandparent.
Your first child will likely be 1) married and 2) have his/her own children.
The first child will most likely not be alone when you die.

But, suppose your first child dies before you but you are beyond the age to have kids, then, according to your logic, your second child will be alone when you die anyway.

Or, suppose your second kid has Tay-Sachs or Edwards Syndrome and is not long for this world. Not only will you first child still be "alone when you die", but now both you and first child need to deal with the loss of the second child.

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Look, unless you live in a Third World country where having kids is necessary for survival as slave labor when they are young and caregivers when you are old, never have a child to fulfill some purpose or plan you have. Why? Because then you and/or the child will be upset if the child can't fulfill that plan.

Really, when having kids, it's best to be a Buddhist and embrace the idea of impermanence - that sadness and grief come disappointment which occurs from failed expectations. If you recognize that all things are impermanent and don't have expectations and just enjoy the things you have while you have them, you will go through life much happier - or at least much that sadder or disappointed.

BOTTOM LINE: Have kids if you want, but enjoy each one for who he or she is and how he and she enrich everyone's lives. Don't EVER have kids to fulfill a purpose.

jahaims · Accepted Answer

You assume that your first child will have no friends or family and that they will end up being life longs friends with their siblings

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Do you want your second child to feel like a spare?

A serious question. You've brought up at least twice that you were "born for the same reason" (your older sister not being alone) so quite obviously it left a negative mark.

So use your head unlike your parents & have a child because you want one. Not as "back-up". Second fiddle.

DaisyM23 · Accepted Answer

I mean... I think single kids do miss out and it would be nice of course to have someone but it could mess things up mentally if you let that decision guide you as a parent
If you want and are in a place where you can have a second kid then go for it

alleon · Answer

I’ve never been one to plan out my child bearing schedule. Or plan at all. I only have one as well and when I did think of kids I always wanted at least 2. But honestly after having one if I’m not in the right place in my life too it wouldn’t be fair to either child. I’d just be a topic for them to complain about later in life lol.

DizzyDesii · Answer

As long as you still want both kids then thats the main thing that matters. I never felt an only child HAD to have a sibling to avoid being alone if i pass away. That what other family members is for. They’d be there for the kid

Apple1996 · Answer

If that is what you want to do then sure. People have babies for crazier reasons. I'm pregnant right now literally just because I want more kids. No reasoning behind it so I say go for it if you want another.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

You Ma'am are crazy. None of your reasoning has anything to do with anything. Have a baby or don't. To be blunt its not your responsibility to worry about such a thing at all.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I don't know why people are saying this is a bad idea. Makes sense to me.

iseekpinetrees · Answer

No. Have as many children as you want personally I have always found loner kids to be kinda weird.

007kingifrit · Answer

no, you don't need to justify having more kids. the purpose of life is to make more life

Jamie05rhs · Answer

What's wrong? Do you have a terminal illness?

In_Trance · Answer

Doesn't seem like a good enough reason to me but whatever works for ya

Anonymous · Answer

1. Are you planning on dying in the 20 years?2. Do you have a husband or extended family?

EaterPeter · Answer

Not wrong. Good choice. 4 years apart?

Coulis · Answer

No have kids. Lots.

AmeerX · Answer

Nothing wrong with it

vald9inches · Answer

Why would that ever be wrong? Lmfao 😂

7771999 · Answer

Not at all

ItsMeItsMe1989 · Answer

Yeah

Would it be wrong to have a second child just for the sake that when I die, my current child isn’t alone?

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Would it be wrong to have a second child just for the sake that when I die, my current child isn’t alone?

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