Do you find it selfish for a couple to have another child after 10-15 years?

[Anonymous]

Being raised as an only child for practically your whole life and suddenly ''oh your new sibling'' as if you're suppose to be celebrating and happy about the news. Why couldn't they give you a sibling during your younger years when you were 2-5 years old for instance? Why after so many years?

[MicahRaine]

I don't know. . . sorta. It also totally could have been an accident, and they don't want the kid to grow up thinking they aren't wanting.

I have some good family friends who stopped having kids and then one day after 13 years of not having kids they found out they were pregnant. It happens lol

Also I hope you don't end up being the babysitter, that's not your responsibility. Having a younger sibling can be a really sweet experience though. I always wanted a younger sibling but never got one, so I ended up just trying to "big brother" some of my younger friends instead lol

[Anonymous]

It is up to the parents, I have no say in the doings of those in marriage. Clearly if they want a child, they have a right to have a child.

It sucks for the child who lived their whole life without a sibling. I’m pissed I grew up with a sister instead of a brother though, what is done is done.

[Asker]

yeah it sucks. I would've loved to grow up with a sibling (doesn't matter the gender to me) closer to my age range whom I would've gone to school with, speak about the same topics, hang out with, etc. I'll never know what that's like. I missed out on all those years. I felt kind of lonely all those years and now with a baby, it feels the same, lonely too.

[MemeSupreme]

no bc life isn't that simple lol unless if it can't be properly supported

it's okay for you to have mixed feelings or not be happy about it tho (as long as you're not being an asshole to them bc of it)

[Asker]

yeah I'm not being mean about it but I'm not celebrating it either.

[itsannalee]

Depends on how old the parents. If they still young and possibly to raise the baby until they adult, the first kid has no right to complain about it. Their life, their body their rules.

[Joshua_H_1010011001]

Stop being a twat.

You will end up loving your bro/sis.

It's different than siblings close in age, and you will end up being more of an aunt or uncle figure.

But kids are great, and you have an awsome opportunity to be in thier life and somone to look up to.

It will work out lovely.

[Purpleronnie]

Hahaha … selfish to bring a human into this world , raise them and support them for many many many many years , without asking anything but respect and love in return.


Yeah can totally se what you’re getting at … so selfish 😆 😂

[Asker]

Well I'm not being mean to them. I was never given a choice to enjoy having a sibling closer to my age range. I can be kind of lonely without my friends. I just don't celebrate it.

[ohsheeT]

I do find it kind of selfish because they're looking towards the older teen to help babysit and take care of that child and I think that's totally wrong

[Asker]

Exactly and I don't feel like being a babysitter. I'm not the mother so it's not my job. I can't even relate to them at all. No, I'm not happy about the news. I'm pissed.

[ohsheeT]

I really don't blame you I mean right now you're going to see and you're going to feel all the negatives because of all these years passing by and then all of a sudden and depending on how you are treated right now around your house only you know what is in store to come probably

The only positive thing that I can say is that once the baby is born and you hold it and you know it's your little sister or brother you might have a little bit change of heart just because you know what you've gone through and you won't want then to go through the same thing

I mean I don't think it's fair for you either but somewhere somehow you have to find the positive from it

[Alwayreckles93]

Believe me it's not fun having siblings close in age they take your toys a lot of fights Your close in my case my sister is two year younger then me we fought over makeup shoes. I younger sister she is 12 and we never fought.

[Apple1996]

Not really that is acutally a good age gap. Having kids close together is draining

[Asker]

I hope I don't end up being the babysitter because I got no patience.

[Asker]

Only two more years to end HS and I'll be moving and they're on their own with the baby.

[Apple1996]

Babysitting is fun tho

[Asker]

Nope. I'd rather be outside than staying inside hearing a crying brat.

[Asker]

I actually imagine sleeping and closing my door, get a good night sleep and let the crying baby be handled by my parents.

[Apple1996]

Babies crying is not a big deal because they're easy to soothe. It's worse when they're older

[Asker]

Not every girl has maternal instincts. It's not my job to take care of a crying baby. It's not.

[Apple1996]

I'm sure they won't expect you to care for the baby at night. I'm a mom and I don't even allow my husband to care for the babies at night let alone my older kids 😂

[Apple1996]

My advice to you is to be kind to your mom and help her out. She will be able to care for the baby better if things around the house around are done

[Asker]

As long as the baby doesn't crying too much (some babies are more moody and cry more than others; hopefully it's a peaceful baby) and I don't have to be changing dirty diapers, I can help out in some things.

[nawtee_me]

@asker You leaving in two years might be why they did it that way. So they won’t be empty nesters once you are gone….

[Apple1996]

@nawtee_me exactly

[Fireguy17]

it might be as big of a surprise to them as it is to you.
Stuff happens.

[Jersey2]

You will be off to college soon so just be cool about it.

[Asker]

yeah that's the good part. Two more years and I'll be moving out. I hope they don't put me as the babysitter because it's not my job.

[Jersey2]

You will love the little one. You are supposed to be entering your maturity so embrace it. Its all good.

[Massageman]

Every couple needs to have 2.1 kids (ok- 10 couples need to have 21 kids, since it's hard to have a fraction of a child) just to make "replacement" rate. It's more selfish not to have any kids, IMHO.

[abbyjgriffin98]

How is that selfish? Are you sure you're not just being selfish?

[Asker]

Because I would've wanted a sibling many years ago, a sibling closer to my age range I could've played, hang out with, talk about topics our ages, go to school with, etc. I missed out on that chance.

[PeachyPie93]

Not really you are leaving the nest, so I assume they wanted a replacement.

[Asker]

I guess. So much for being irreplaceable for years. I missed that. Also, I missed out on what it would've been like having a sibling closer to my age range. I would've liked that many years ago.

[PeachyPie93]

Having a sibling close to your own age is just competition for your parents love and them fighting with you for no reason.. It is better to have a sibling this far away in age because you are old enough to be mature and to love them.

[WhitneySnow]

I see your point. You feel like your whole world’s been turned upside down.

[Asker]

yeah pretty much. Now it's not just me. At this point I would've been ok with being an only child. I wanted a sibling years ago, close to my age range

[WhitneySnow]

I get it. My sister is seven years younger than me.

[exitseven]

What if they are having another kid to harvest a kidney for the kid that they already have?

[Asker]

I don't know about that. I'm very healthy and don't need a donation.

[Loki97]

Selfish of the child to assume they have a say in the parents affairs

[allaboutyou2]

There is nothing selfish about being a good parent. re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

[pinconon]

every new life is a blessing including your new sibling

[Staximus]

Don't be mean to the new baby, it's not his or her fault for being born.

[Iron_Man]

Well I was the baby of the family 3 kids including myself at 13 younger than my brother

[Iron_Man]

Age was never a factor in life between us and we always livedtogether after he got back from the Air Force and working at the family campground as a manager

[Surely]

Do you think that the pregnancy was planned. Or possibly an oops?

[Fury_storm]

don't be so upset. siblings are lots of fun. you can play together.

[Asker]

it would've been fun if it were a sibling closer to my age I can play with, not a baby.

[Asker]

we're going to be at total different stages of lives and I have no patience to babysit

[Fury_storm]

nah, it'll still be really fun

[Asker]

you gotta be joking.. I like spending time with friends, going skating, participating in science clubs and hate staying at home too much.

[Asker]

I'm not a home girl.

[Fury_storm]

just get a giant teddy bear. you'll have oodles of fun!

[Anastasia06]

I’m the younger sibling my sister treated me great she 12 years older than me.

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

Maybe the pregnancy was unplanned?

[Asker]

I guess. They don't say it.

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

So you're like late teens?

It might be fun having a baby around.

You're probably going to college pretty soon anyway.

[Asker]

yup, two more years and I'm moving out.

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

Maybe that's why your parents had another kid. They know you're leaving soon.

[Wise4myage]

Depends on how old the couple is.

[Asker]

My mom is now 38 (she had me at age 22) and dad is 41.

[Wise4myage]

That's not bad at all.

[Graptemys79]

Why would it be considered selfish?

[Asker]

because why now? I wanted a sibling many years ago, to bond with, hang out with, talk about similar topics, etc.

[Anonymous]

I don’t see what’s selfish about it

[nawtee_me]

No, not at all….. why would it be?

[Jmmmfi4]

Yeah that's weird

[MoonFace2]

Not really.

[DtMe89]

Yeah, I do

[In_Trance]

No I don't