Is it bad not going to your best friend’s baby shower?

[Anonymous]

I’m from the UK so baby showers aren’t really a thing in our culture. But they’re becoming more common I suppose. I live abroad in Germany and when I come home I normally need to spend a week or so in the UK to make it worthwhile. I just found out that one of my best friend’s cousins is organising a baby shower for my friend and it’s a big deal
because she didn’t get to have one for her first baby (born during the pandemic). If I was living in the UK I would go but as I live in Germany it’s a bit expensive to come over just for a baby shower. Is it bad to miss your best friend’s shower if you live far away? I suppose I kind of feel jealous of her cousin-type relative who is also super close with her. She’s one of those mutual friends that you never really get on with (or they never try to get to know you) and you generally find unpleasant - but you can’t say that to your friend because she obv loves her. Plus she also has kids so I can see that they have more in common perhaps than me and my friend. Has any other gals out there had this kind of jealousy before when your friends move into new chapters of their lives? And also do you think it‘s okay to skip a baby shower in any circumstances?

[boggboss]

Ofc the distance is a fair reason but how can u be jealous when u are no longer there for your friend and others are

[Asker]

I’m there for her in other ways like on the phone/calls/texting. Obviously it’s hard to meet physically because I’m only back three/four times a year. It’s a bit harsh to say I’m not there for her.

[boggboss]

Its not harsh because thats simply the reality its nobody's fault u simply live elsewhere so expecting the friendship to stay the same is unrealistic and sure u may still communicate over the phone but thats nothing compared to in person

[Guyvo]

Distance is a totally legit reason to not come unless ur superrich

[Anonymous]

Yes...

[Asker]

Don’t just answer with no explanation :/