My cousin says she can't go to college because she has ADHD, I mean, what can she do?

[Kkstarzz96]

I want to give my cousin the benefit of the doubt that she just needs tutoring or to not take more than 3 college credits at a time? Since she'll be working, but I don't have adhd and I don't have family members that if they do have it, they definitely don't talk about it and how it affects them with learning. My problem is she lives in San Francisco and community College is paid for so I'm annoyed truly that she is holding off on that with no plans to go back and continue to work for very little money. So what can I do? Who do I talk to?

Thank you,
Kaitlyn Kelly

Updates

+1 y

LOLL I thought I was writing an email and I revealed my name in the closing well if you want to look me up good luck it's a lot of white women 😅

[Twalli]

She can if she has medication. I had a friend who has ADHD and now runs a treatment facility for low functioning kids with autism. I mean I could reach out to her, but we haven't talked in over 5 years. It took her a while and she had to go twice, but she got through it eventually.

[Kkstarzz96]

Do you mean she went twice to college meaning she left and came back or she failed out of a program and tried again later?

[Twalli]

She went to college and then after working for a while went back. I think she graduated the first time.

[Red_Arrow]

One of my children had an extremely bad brain injury and is still disable due to it. Earned an AA degree by taking fewer coursed at a time, but still make it!

[Red_Arrow]

Thank you for MHGuy. :-)

[Anonymous]

Is she on medicine for it. I would get all the help you can get to get her to college
The school might no second or a doctor

[Andres77]

Can't you delete your own post to protect your name?

My daughter has ADHD also.
She's on meds to help, but only on days she needs it.
She graduated highschool early and is now in college.
I'm helping her get organized but she's picking up the pace and doing more on her own.
ADHD has it's difficulties but it shouldn't stop us.
I hope she figures this out or at least has some adult support.
I hope you find what you're looking for.

[20yearsolder]

You can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do. There is medication for ADHD. Sounds to me like she isn't interested in attending college. College isn't for everyone.

[Kkstarzz96]

So it's an excuse? Thats the worst case scenario. Do you think I want my cousin to be a waitress for a family owned restaurant? I know she can do a lot more and enjoy it. But no one is going to take her seriously if she doesn't dedicate herself to learning about something, anything, for absolutely free

[20yearsolder]

Once again, it's not your problem. If she wants to attend college she will and if she doesn't want to go no matter how much you bitch she's not going to do it

[Kkstarzz96]

I didn't bitch I don't want to I'm not here to bitch at anybody I want to understand her so I can help that's why I wanted someone to tell me is adhd that bad that you can't pass college courses and she is on medication so I'm confused cause I have my own things I'm on medication before but it's not a learning disability, as long as the medication is helpful, you are supposed to be able to carry on with your daily activities as far as I'm concerned

[20yearsolder]

If she made it through high school, then I would say yes she can probably make it through college. She has to apply herself and take her medication and if the medication doesn't help then she needs to tell her doctor that

[Kkstarzz96]

Exactly she says it's fine I mean medication helps but it doesn't treat the problem just the symptoms so yes that's what I'm afraid of, is she is using adhd as an excuse but I didn't ask enough questions to go straight to that conclusion. I know nothing about this disability, I'm sure she could do some type of certification at the very least, but you have to pick what you want to learn about, she used to say she wanted to be a surgeon, which is a doctor, I mean what kind of 360 is that lmao

[20yearsolder]

I'm assuming she's 18 plus years old, no matter what you want her to do, she doesn't have to do it. If she has her mind set that she's not going to college then nobody on this planet can make her go. Maybe she's happy being a waitress, I don't know her.

[Kkstarzz96]

Everything is fine until something happens and that one pitfall (Car, hospital, family member who supports her can't support her anymore) creates the whole ship to sink. That's what I'm trying to say from experience. I'm not forcing anyone to do anything, but life happens for everyone and it shows no mercy if you planned for it or didn't.

[20yearsolder]

I truly understand your concern but once again, you can want her to go all you want and you can try to explain to her how it would benefit her but she's the one that has to go. Unless you're going to hold her hand and walk her through that door everyday. The only way she's going to go is if she wants to go. That's the end of the story. Yes you're a great person for trying to help her and I hope you succeed but if you don't it's her own fault. You tried

[Kkstarzz96]

When you say it like that it does make me realize that when I was going to class it was me going, even though I thought it was so my family would let me be, it was still me. Sometimes I didn't go cause I was just tired of the money draining from my working hours, but if it was covered, I don't see why i couldn't go. Sometimes I went with a bunch of snacks to keep my interest and yeah the class went off topic but it kept me awake. School isn't just a measure of your effort it's a life experience and I missed it a lot when I wasn't going after high-school, I missed not feeling pressure to perform and was just there to try, unlike a job. Sigh thanks

[IsoUser]

Why can't she go to college their are medications that will help as well as study techniques encourage her to pursue both and go to college.

[Iron_Man]

Why can’t you take one course at a time and see how it goes don’t ever quit trying

[Kkstarzz96]

It's not me it's my cousin lmao she literally said no to the whole thing like I would say your suggestion and she'd say I have adhd and I honestly don't know how much that impacts you, but you see all kinds of people with some type of vocational training beyond high-school

[Iron_Man]

She just making excuses so she won’t have to go she’s being lazy

[fireforeffect]

The importance of college is way over blown.

[Kkstarzz96]

I meant as in any type of training to do a job after high-school that isn't related to waitresses or retail lol

[fireforeffect]

Many technical jobs.
HVAC, Refrigeration and Electronics, just to name a few.

[Kkstarzz96]

Yeah but she says she has adhd so what the heck do i tell her that those jobs are for people who can't pay attention to details