I think they did the best they could at least at first (they were poor and spent most of their money on appearing not to be, so "the best they could" was a bit hobbled), but honestly the challenges I presented for them were unique and they were not equipped to handle them - I don't think anyone would have been. I think they started feeling like they might be failing as parents around the age of 12 and then got hostile because they wanted that to be my fault, not theirs. When in reality it was no one's fault. I was just born a bit crazy, i think, but not so crazy that I couldn't shed enough of it with age to figure the rest of the way out on my own. Then pretending to be sane became routine until it was no longer a pretense. Now I can't even remember how to be crazy anymore.
But all that said I don't actually have many problems, so there isn't really anything to blame on them. I suppose i dont like how lucky I had to be to avoid a lot of problems i could be facing right now, but that's a lot of abstraction to figure out something to be mad about (I'm not fox news, lol). Though if I had to think of a specific thing I would have liked to have been taught it would be how to speak to people more effectively. I don't know if that's something they could have taught me (and language stuff is best taught early so only they could have), but they didn't all the same. Though, again, I got lucky there too: as i got older the world re-aligned and most communication is done online with typed words now, which I can do just fine.
I do think my siblings could make a case for blaming our parents for a lot of stuff, though. The time and attention they spent on staying mad at me really exhausted them from paying due attention to the normal kids that actually would have responded to real nurturing. But I don't really blame them for anything, no.
Which one biological or adopted. Adopted were amazing
my biological mother gave me PTSD because she liked to lock me in a car at 105° weather to go have sex she would lock me outside in 32°F and below weather and slept with dogs I was bitten because I was hungry by her I was smacked across the face when I cried and was so dirty when I came to my adoptive mothers house the water literally turned black. 90% of kids would’ve died in my situation so other then PTSD nothing it’s my life I make my own decisions she had influence my life very early (I did have to take growth hormones for eight years because of her by the way) beyond that I have wonderful caring parents that decided to adopt me and I can ask for a better life this is why I am so pro-choice is because I think that adoption is better option than death I wasn’t unwanted child I was an extremely abused child according to most of the arguments from Democrats and those who are pro-choice I shouldn’t be alive. This is why I can never buy into the pro choice argument because according to pro-choice I should be dead I should’ve been killed before I was born and that’s fucked up
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Anonymous
(18-24)
1 y
I blame my dad for a lot. For abusing my mom, cheating, for leaving us and making her struggle by not paying child support, his parents who have my mom he’ll when she asked for child support, etc. Having to deal with a broken mom and my own fears nowadays is all thanks to him. Fears as in I get scared when men raise their voice (there been times I was so scared that I’ve peed myself…), just keeping quiet when I get treated like shit so fights aren’t prolonged, not being able to stand up for myself much being afraid how men will react, etc.
Some such as blaming them for my inherited health issues. Lol And sometimes for the way they brought me up although I realized that its all mixed factors as to who I am now but partly because of my parents especially those times when I was not mature enough and was dependent on them.
Honestly? A lot. They never made me feel loved, I never heard the words "I love you" directed towards me or any of my siblings. We were made to believe that if we got anything under an A in school we should be deeply ashamed. We were constantly trying to please them and never once felt like they were proud of us. Since social anxiety, anorexia and depression are all common factors among me and my siblings, there really is (almost) only one explanation.
It is a loaded phrase people use to manipulate. Comes down to people’s actions. My wife does tons for me, my mother- expects tons. And of course i do tons for my wife too
It is, but in their actions they never showed me actual affection. They didn't even hug me (if that says anything), so I have a really hard time showing physical affection to people as well.
My parents are strictly religious, I am not, they don't support me much less the stuff I do. I'm 20 (in a couple of weeks) and moved out at 18, and they still feel like they can control the aspects of my life that they don't approve of, even though I'm completely independent and have been for almost 2 years. They still say my atheism is a phase, and that I'm not old enough to know what I want. But I've never been religious, I only pretended to be because I was afraid they'd throw me out of the house, and sure enough, when I told them at 18 (when I was ready to move out) they clearly were happy that I moved.
I can’t think of any. My parents have and are putting in effort to raise a healthy and successful family. They are not perfect, but no one is. I’m grateful for them always and in debt to them for the rest of my life.
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