As you've gotten older has your friend circle gotten smaller? And why?

Question

Texaskid1 · Accepted Answer

Yes.

I have friends but I have not seen most of them in years. Most have gotten married and have kids. When that happens they disappear of the face of the Earth. I am 45 and not married so I know what this is like. Buddies that I used to hang out with now live on Mars. Their wives do not want them to have any single guy friends.

Also , as you get older you have less emotional experiences. when you are young you go through a lot of new experiences. I went to college in the late 90's and I still feel a close camaraderie with my ex-roommates from way back when. Those were good and bad times - the first time out of the nest , cramming for tests , talking about girls and trying to figure them out , wondering what would be of our lives when we graduated. It is easy to make friends when you are a teen and in your 20's. After that it gets hard because people get married , they have kids , they move away etc. I have some nice co-workers that I talk to at work here and there but I do not feel close to any of them.

I guess I could say that I still have many friends but life gets in the way and all that...

The_Shadow_Dweller · Accepted Answer

When I was younger, comparatively, I used to meet all of the people in my classroom hence friends +no friends people meet too. And as you know, people are polite just for the time being most of the time. Hence it did not become clear, who exactly was your true friend and who was not.

The revelation comes when you do not meet, but still you or the guy/girl maintain a contact with you afterwards. And I found, only a handful of people talked. That is my true circle.

But over the time, four years now, no contact is there. A complete set of new friends. Even they will be gone when I am done with the college. Again a new set of friends in business school. The cycle goes on. The helpful ones are retained, others are discarded. With great deal of thought too.

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

In my mid-twenties, it's actually gotten larger than when I was in gradeschool/high school where I had like 6 friends and that's it.

Now that I have a SO, I've absorbed access to his friends, and I've gained a few selected coworker friends (and their respective SOs), and a couple friends from college. I feel like my circle of friends/acquainces has only multiplies and that I have people from various parts of my life.

While I'm obviously not besties with everyone, I definitely feel more fulfilled having a larger (if not broader) network of people I can live life with.

What people don't talk about, is how old friendships can sour just by existing differently. Getting out of boring social groups and obligation traps is definitely the way go.

I'm sure as I get into my 30s, my friend group will shrink as other people grow in their own ways (having kids). But who knows, maybe I will have just acquired more friends and friends of friends.

BeeNee · Accepted Answer

For 20 full years I had the same friendship circle. We always hung out, did everything, shared the holidays. Now the circle is down to like 5. Unfortunately there was a death, then a divorce of two who went their separate ways, and then some moved away, and others just got consumed by parenting. It happens. I loved our large group, but I'm also super grateful for the ones still around, still as loyal, still best friends.

HighValue · Answer

It got smaller over time as I seen how stupid most of the people were that I was around in high school and soon after. Most of them ended up in jail one or more times, usually for drugs or stealing. I quit socializing with those people because I had nothing in common with them. The only reason I hang out with them back then was because we were all into gaming at the time and almost everyone was on drugs so it was either be around idiots or nobody.

Later on when I worked in schools I made new friends that are better. The bus drivers I worked with are actually better people morally and have a better past than the teachers I work with now so I still socialize with the bus drivers and maintenance instead of other teachers.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes. 1. It's just the natural progression of life. We all have to follow where life takes us. And that away from old friendships usually. As you get older youstart to understand what is healthy in your life and sometimes it takes a little while to learn some people you knew were not people that were very good influences on your life. You get married and have kids and that takes precedence over all else so that puts your friends further on the back burner. And all the while if you're not replacing these friends. With newer friends, keep in mind they're dealing with all these adult issues so even if you make time for them maybe they're unable to make time for you. Soyou can find yourself with a very small circle.

Sarahr123 · Answer

People get busy, you learn to weed out the fake people from the real and so you remove people from your life and by the time you’re a certain age you’ll probably only have one or two actual close friends who are at this point as good as family. The important thing is quality and not quantity.

DaisyM23 · Answer

I mean I'm 19 so I can't really talk but I'm still in the same circle of friends since I was like 12ish although I only really keep in regular contact with 2 of them, but I would say I've grown more closer to the circle of friends I've only had since 16ish now so actually I should change my answer lol

It's just time I guess. People move for university, get new friends, get busy with work, start having different interests and values etc

Puppystarfish23 · Answer

Only till recently it got big. I've always struggled to find people like myself and found it hard to fit in.

Since I started my job a year ago I have loads of amazing friends who actually listen to me and want me around and it's so nice. I was bullied at school for being different and now I have people who love me for being different

mandyfire98 · Answer

It kind of traded off like after highschool I didn't talk much to those friends because we went to different schools or just in different circles. I got a new friend group in college that I'm super close with. After college we didn't get to hang out as much but I still get to hangout with them every once in a while.

NamerOfStars · Answer

Yep. People got strongly into demanding careers, got married and had kids, and drifted off, bit by bit, one by one. Of course, it's always possible to meet NEW people, but that gets harder as you get older, and even something as simple as readjusting your schedule to accommodate meeting with someone regularly gets to be more annoying as you become more set in your ways.

SecretsofKB · Answer

I moved away for college and never went home. Since of my friends still live there. Of the friends I made in college, most moved home or to a new city after we graduated. They followed jobs. I got a job in this city so I stayed.

They're all still friends, just not in the immediate friend circle. That has gotten smaller as I've gotten older.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Yes because fake friends don't keep in touch after highschool. Then collage is just full of more fake people who are pointless to know. Then work is the same. Or it's just people you have to more put with than friends.

Anonymous · Answer

People change. Move away. Turn out to be snakes. The list goes on. You get tired of dealing with peoples bullshit people who use you. People with no boundaries.

People who have absolutely no life outside of you. You just cut people out of your life and stop going out of your way to meet people anymore.

does it suck being alone? Yeah. But then every time I go and meet someone. I live to regret it. Fuck it.

BlueScorpio · Answer

It was never that big even when I was younger lol high-school it was practically nonexistent. I have one good friend but we always work and never see each other. So it's just my husband, cat, and my mom, brother, nephew and my aunt and uncle.

TsundereMatrix · Answer

As for physical friends, yes but I have way more online and I think it comes down to interests and just finding people that I vibe with. Sometimes the people you need in your life are not near you geographically.

Saltystardust · Answer

Yes it has. Mainly because most of my former friends were the bachelor types, who didn't want kids or responsibilities. It bothered them that I would choose a date night or going to the park with my kids over bro time.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, because I'm more comfortable being alone and because I have more self love and self respect. I used to tolerate things that I don't anymore. I used to be afraid to have no friends, so I took any crumbs of "friendship". I equated the amount of friends you had with how loveable you are, but now I realize that it's not true at all. You can have 50 fake friends who don't give a shit about you, or you can have one true friend who'd die for you.

Kebler · Answer

its because when you are getting older, and you don't really want to go out more and want to do things when you are younger. You just want to settle down and chill. Simple answer

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

It got smaller but it's expanding again. I think there's a sort of process where you start to realize what kind of people you want to spend your time around.

TrueConfection · Answer

Definitely! Between family, school, and kids' activities... I haven't had time to nurture friendships. My friends all became busy about the same time too. Such is life.

Bruuu · Answer

I had this realization last year, met someone who was into the same things as I, but we just didn't get along no matter what. I find this unlikely to happen when you're younger.

Anonymous · Answer

yes and no. i still have the same 2 friends from high school. we only hang out once every couple of months. i guess i just value my alone time more lol

FilmGuy93 · Answer

My friend group has gotten way smaller. It’s happened, if for no other reason than that I’ve gotten less tolerant of people’s bad behavior.

bubblegunnn · Answer

Hmm nah i even got new circle to hang with, but i still hang w old circle as well. Equaly

Anonymous · Answer

Hmm... Every time I'd move to a different city I would at least make one friend (only 1 friend tbh). But now I have none. So yeah, Ig so my friend circle has gotten smaller over the years.

DancingQueen16 · Answer

Yeah my friend group started to become smaller in middle school because me and a lot of my friends from 5th grade started drifting apart

marshmallowcream · Answer

Surprisingly it got bigger but is a completely different group than the one I had when I was younger

ArtemisSilver · Answer

Yes it has, because most people don't want to do anything after a soul draining week at work. Can't say I blame them either.

Havthrills · Answer

Apparently my attitude is the key. I get along with everyone, but hanging out I start to lose friends.

goaded · Answer

No, but the reason in that picture is going nuts and being paranoid.

Mangospacho · Answer

Yeah it’s gotten smaller especially after having kids and having to do stuff with them during my free time.

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

Funny, 2019 mine was actually the biggest, now there is none. No one ever has time or wants to do something

BLP11520 · Answer

People move away, get divorces. Raising kids changes people. Jobs are demanding. Time to see people is limited. Covid messed up everything so bad many just want to go home eat and stay home.

LavLavLuv · Answer

yes cuz i like to put the shitty ones in the trash

dolemite89 · Answer

smaller, it’d hard to have tons of friends when ur so busy

dustybiker · Answer

No. I have more friends these days.

Nikki1989 · Answer

No, I have too many friends now.

abc3643 · Answer

Yes, this is a natural phenomenon.

Agape93 · Answer

Yeap, some have dies, and I dropped one

misogynistic_pig · Answer

I miss my friends from school.

AsaKyo · Answer

More like it's become non-existent 😂😂😂

fonduegirl · Answer

It was a nonexistent one

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Absolutely

Andres77 · Answer

That’s actually a pretty accurate slide.

EaterPeter · Answer

Yes. Moving around for work and to be with family.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Yep. I hate people more the older I get

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Oh fuck yeah

Zolly99999 · Answer

Bigger...

As you've gotten older has your friend circle gotten smaller? And why?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

As you've gotten older has your friend circle gotten smaller? And why?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.