What would you do if your son suddenly tells you he wants to be a girl?

Question

AaronKrieger · Accepted Answer

I am not going to advocate for it and try to convince him that he should give it more time by first improving his own life. Making a decision like that is a big one and he should improve certain factors of his life to gain confidence if he hasn't already such as:
- Dating
- Working
- Having a good routine
- Eating healthy
- Socializing with others
- Find a goal to work towards even in if it's in a hobby
- Therapy and medication maybe (depends)

I think for a lot of trans people a big factor is lack of confidence and having a depressing life, as it was for my brother who is now a transwoman. He always thought he was unattractive to women so he never dated or asked girls out, not manly, stayed indoors all day gaming, never socialized which meant no friends, and he was depressed due to this. I know this, since he used to express these feelings to me at times.

If my son in this situation were still has this overwhelming feeling that he wants to be a girl, then I am not sure what I would do. I would likely heavily research gender dysphoria and it's treatments. Also, read on experiences of those who have it, so I can try to come to a better conclusion.

dynamicyandere · Accepted Answer

If he wants to transition, he’s not going to be allowed to until he’s over 18 and has a job where he can pay for his own hormone therapy.

Our brains aren’t even fully developed until about 24. Most people are figuring out what they want in life and who they are for a long time.

If it’s a very thoroughly thought-out decision, over the course of years of self-discovery, then sure, I’d be supportive.

But, what I’m not supportive of is impulsive decisions without an understanding of long term implications, complications, and repercussions.

Just like I wouldn’t allow my 12-year-old son to get a giant Batman tattoo on his chest. No. He’d need to wait until he’s of age, and mentally mature. Then he can decide.

Transitioning has more permanent affects than tattoos though. And, it’ll require them to be on medication for the rest of their life. If they end up regretting their decision it’s going to put them through a LOT of turmoil.

I’m in favor of informed, sober-minded, mature, adult decisions. If they can meet that criteria, I’ll be supportive, but they will have already become full a grown adult and moved out by that point.

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

I believe nature sorts out irregularities in children's behaviour if you trust the process and treat your kids with love and attention. My cousin was neglected by both her mom and dad and now she has more money than Nicky Hilton. She was raised by her aunt and uncle who took care of her on her dad's behalf out of pity since her dad ignored her.

Anemone978 · Accepted Answer

If he was a child I would just guide him in the right direction into his boyhood and to love himself as he is. Tell him being a boy is good.
If he was a teenager, I would send him for counselling and see what weirdos he is hanging out with.. and he would have to get new friends..

jshm2 · Answer

The same as I would if he says he wants to be a dolphin, gay, Martian, serial killer or any other notion that can just come into the head of impressionable kids.

You sit them down, and make the root of the notion disappear from their lives.

lightbulb27 · Answer

If that's what you want, there's the door, we'll give you a sleeping bag and a few dollars.

proud of my wife already dealing with this with the girl saying "I think maybe I'm bi"... because other girls around her said they are bi. You gotta protect kids. Feel for the ones that don't have strong guidance in this world... they are but boats to be thrashed on the rocks.

Don't believe any BS kids tell you... for a lot of it is projected onto them and they have a lot they are dealing with.

For some select few, it may be true. I'd have to really be convinced that's right thing.

Leapfrog00 · Answer

I would probably support his wish but wouldn't allow him to do it until he is an adult. I would ask some questions though, especially the question "Why?" Not to sound ignorant, but to get a better understanding of him.

I would be concerned that he would get bullied. People are so ignorant and have no respect for others. This world is full of racists, bigotry, and fascist assholes. With that being said, I'd probably buy him a can of Mase, so he could Mase the unwanted assholes. But yeah, it's his body, so it's his decision.

Berethor · Answer

I would tell him that it insane thought, and maybe show him that video, depends on his age.

KimmyKimchi · Answer

Depends how old he is. If he's under 18, talk to him about it, help him understand what it means, try to figure out if he might be trans, confused or just a bit feminine. Make sure he understands what he just told me, etc.

If he's over 18 then I greet my new daughter and let her know I love her 😀

LogicBomber · Answer

Tell him that “no, he doesn’t”… he has been confused and brainwashed by a society (especially the corrupt school system) that is pushing this bullshit agenda telling children this insane nonsense that boys can be girls and girls can be boys.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a pirate. If the stupid school system and society were as screwed up as they are now, I would have been blind in one eye and have my left leg cut off at the knee, and as an adult I would have been pissed that society normalized such moronic ideas in children.

MissStrawberry912 · Answer

I support. Many trans is aware at a young age that is who they are. But a lot of times the world and culturally isn’t accepting of them just be who they are. If I was a mom, Idc what others thinks because that’s my kid and I just want them to be happy/comfortable for being them than causing depression and making them closed up for not being accepted nor love.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd take him out for some father son time so I could see how he really looks at the world. Probably take him with me to work for a couple days, go to some kind of fair or museum or something.

I'd really want to hear him out and why he thinks it's the right decision for himself and ask him what he thinks of the things he sees around him day to day. Like couples going places together or girls running outside in gym clothes, guys working construction or whatever.

I mean really study the kid.

And it would be less for me to make a decision and more to force him to think with a little more perspective than possibly someone just putting the idea in his head for one reason or another.

And if after all that he still wants to be a girl, then I'm gonna tell him to be the best version of himself he can be because the two saddest thing in life are wasted potential and regret.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

I wanted to be a boy my whole childhood, if my parents listened I would be in huge trouble.

I am now so feminine and happy I am a girl haha

I still have that tomboyish side but I am truly happy I am a girl

whorable · Answer

these other comments are a one way ticket to them cutting you out of their life. you don’t have to encourage it but just let them know you love them and it will take some time. ask them questions if you want.. like “ how long have you felt this way”

CrimsonAngel09 · Answer

"It's a mental illness..."

"Needs deprogramming..."

"It's silly..."

Then you know someone will say, "I will disown my child and want nothing to do with them anymore..."

Meine Gott, most of these comments are why I hate people and don't talk to anyone here or bother looking at responses to my comments. KimmyKimchi has the only right and mature response. My block list just gets longer and longer each day.

Daniela1982 · Answer

I don't have any children, but if my son said that to me I'd slap him one alongside the head and say, "What za matta wit you? Got no brain?"

JustMeL120 · Answer

Just let him discover the world and who he is without talking to him like and adult. He is  a baby he doesn't even understand what a girl is. Give him a doll and girly toys boys should be able to play with dolls without getting there gender changed.

PraviteliNahuiValite · Answer

HOLY FUCKING SHITBALLS, WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING IN MY LIFE? I DON'T KNOW IF I SHOULD BE EXCITED OR TERRIFIED! MY PRICK IS CONFUSED, MY BALLS ARE IN A KNOT AND MY BRAIN IS ON FIRE! DOES THIS MEAN I HAVE A DAUGHTER NOW? DO I NEED TO BUY DRESSES AND MAKEUP? SHOULD I START CALLING HIM 'HER'? I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, BUT ONE THING'S FOR SURE, I NEED TO TAKE A COLD SHOWER AND CALM MYSELF DOWN BEFORE I EXPLODE INTO A MASSIVE BALL OF CONFUSION AND LUST!

DarkWinterNights · Answer

Depends on the age. One of my friends young daughters (8 yo) told them she was a boy and they found out the school was socially transitioning her. He had a job offer in the town I live in, so they didn’t rock the boat, simply said they had to move for work. Within a week of moving she dropped the whole “I’m a boy” thing and it hasn’t come up since.

Anonymous · Answer

Tell him well that sucks because you’re not one and can never be one just like you can’t become a dragon.

Apple1996 · Answer

Tell him that he can be a girl when he's 18+ and out of my house

Jennz6 · Answer

First off, I don’t have any children, but if I had a son that wanted to be a girl I would try to discourage him by letting him see what it’s like to be a girl. I might make him wear a dress 👗 and take him out in public, and see how he feels when his friends see him dressed like a girl and I would take him shopping so he could try on girls clothes and panties. I would hope that he would be embarrassed and change his mind.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Leave him be. Allow him to paint his nails and grow his hair and play with dolls. In a few weeks he'll probably want to be a dragon or something equally weird. If he's old enough to make such decisions then I'm supportive.

Sparkie460 · Answer

I'd have a talk with him and find out why he wants to be a girl. I'd try to talk him out of it but if he's got his mind set on it then I'd support him. A parent is supposed to support their children in whatever they want to do. I'd be heartbroken but it's his life

AviatorTom · Answer

My initial reaction would be shock. Then I would have a calm discussion with him about how good it is to be a man.

EmmaMary · Answer

Initially offer him help and support, then look for the very best therapy possible.

gorydetails · Answer

tell him, “well that sucks, but you’re a boy so you’re going to have to learn to deal with it.”

inhua · Answer

I'd tell him I want to be Superman even though I still can't fly or shoot lasers from my eyes

sage2021 · Answer

I would tell him you can't be a girl. You don't even know what that feels like, so why would you want to be something you know nothing about? The answer is NO!! BECAUSE I SAID SO!!

Shamalien · Answer

“We’re going away! Far away!” yeah I’m gunna find the culprit too tho and give them a stern talking to. My kid is getting pulled out of school almost certainly

Googlemyahoo · Answer

Find out who has been indoctrinating him & deal with it

Adam1978 · Answer

Nothing my son has to accept what life gave him. But I would ask him why and put his logic back into track.

humanearth · Answer

Tell him he has to wait till he is a adult. One its a stall that will make him think about his decision And gives you time to think on what to say when it comes up again

richardcory · Answer

I'd be interested in what "being a girl" means to him. Find out how long he's felt that way

Anonymous · Answer

I would say get him professional help... but I'm not even sure if those people can be trusted these days. Either way, I'll continue to love and protect my son... Even if he hates me for it for a while.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Show him support. That is what good parents do.

Likes2drive · Answer

Depends how old they are, some kids say silly things and don’t mean it, I would find out why they are saying it and if it’s genuine, they certainly can’t make that decision until they are old enough and past puberty

David4358 · Answer

I will tell him that a boy can never become a girl, its a scientific reality that even with mutilating your body you will always just be a boy with a mutilated body. I would help him learn to love himself and the real person he is..

stepyo99 · Answer

Talk some sense into him and try to get him some therapy. Disown him if he resists getting mental help.

sassymoon · Answer

He’s too young and you need to check out his schools pushy agenda switch schools if possible

WanderingLoveWizard · Answer

Same reaction I'd have when he tells me he wants to be a dog

Quackthulu2 · Answer

I’d be confused as to who the fuck this kid was and why they think I am their mom.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd ignore it. In 99% of cases children grow out of that kind of thing.. In other words i won't do what these worthless leftists do, Which would be pumping him full of hormones and chopping his penis off.

OfDeath · Answer

I would say I want to be a player in the NBA but it isn't physically possible.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I'd tell him I want to be a god, but thats impossible too.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I would immediately tell Alexa that I want to order a machete and a spear. (And make sure he hears me say it.)

Cubus · Answer

I would tell him that many teenagers feel this way and in 90% of cases they stop feeling like this, after they grow up.

Pudsmucker · Answer

I'd ask you more he got that information from. Usually it's indoctrination from a school. That is if he's at school age.

HippieVeganJewslim · Answer

I’d give her some unisex clothing first. I’d ask what exactly means she. If she wants to be a girl, mazel tov, she can be!

Anonymous · Answer

Take him out of his school. They've actually started this at a local elementary school

AngryCarl2 · Answer

I'd say hard luck son, you're a boy and there's nothing you can do about it.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Tell him he's confused

Vegasrunner · Answer

Depends on his age but if he's an adult I'd have to show him the girl.

purplepoppy · Answer

I'd cut his bud light allowance

exitseven · Answer

I would have him deprogrammed.

OddBeMe · Answer

Say ok. Depending on his age, support his decisions.

msc545 · Answer

Ask him if he needs help - and wish him luck.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd tell him, "Well you're off to a good start. You're already not making much sense". 😆😆😆

Anonymous · Answer

Get out a sharp knife and tell them to drop their drawers. When they pull them up. They will no longer be a man!

Spade_01 · Answer

Talk to them out of this mental illness.

MementoMori777 · Answer

Tell him he isn't

roy_ricky09 · Answer

Tight slap!!!

Massageman · Answer

He's a male - live with it.

nawtee_me · Answer

Find out who has been brainwashing him?

What would you do if your son suddenly tells you he wants to be a girl?

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