Was it better off not knowing my father wanted a boy as his first child?

[Anonymous]

I stumbled into a short, unedited video clip of a baby gender reveal party. On that video segment, it shows my father (his own voice alright) saying it's going to be a boy, he popped the balloon and he got covered in pink powder. He slightly disappointed, didn't smile as much as if it had been a boy and walked away for a couple seconds. Then he came back and recovered fast.

That's the only unedited segment I never saw until recently. In the rest of video and pictures, my parents were happy. Ironically I grew up being more close to dad. But still... was it better off never finding that clip? My father never got his wish of a boy. My mother got pregnant again when I was 6 and my twin sisters were born.

[wolfcat87]

Why does it bother you? I wanted a son first and a daughter second. Then, my son could protect my daughter. I was convinced she would be a boy for 2 weeks until I saw her in a dream and she was a girl. I was still more than happy to have a daughter, the order they were born in didn't bother me for long. As you say, you are close with your father, so he's clearly happy to have had you. I'm happy with my daughter as well. She's built well enough to wreck any guy, so she never even needed the protection. Ha ha

[Asker]

Your last sentences pretty much describes me. I guess 5'7 is a good height for a girl. I can sure pack a powerful hook (left or right, either way.. equally) if needed, along with other surprise combinations. Dad taught me all that. So not bad for a daughter.

[Anonymous]

A lot of men hope to have a son to follow in their footsteps, be in their likeness. Plus, they think they will worry a bit less about a son. Girls grown up to be young adults who might be pregnant or used just for sex by young, immature guys. They're a bit less protective of sons.

Don't take it to heart. Most people want a healthy baby, above all.

[Asker]

Or the parents can raise a strong, independent girl that doesn't take BS from anyone, that can stand her ground. Someone pressuring me for sex gets immediately dumped. The keeper that loves me will happily ask for my parents' blessing, not hide and wait till my wedding day.

[NamerOfStars]

Maybe- but maybe not. Have you never been disappointed in how something turned out, only to later learn it was better the way it happened?

Have you taught him the joys that a daughter can bring? If so, then be glad that you've taught him a happy lesson in a pleasant way. If not, well, it sounds like it's time to get started.

[Asker]

I've always been closer to dad than mom. Dad was going to teach these things if he had a son but he ended up teaching me how to be assertive, have confidence, not take BS from anyone and pack good hooks along with several defensive combinations if needed. So not bad for a daughter.
I believe some things can be equally taught to both genders. I'm glad.

[NamerOfStars]

Well, there you go. And yeah, pretty much anything can be taught to both genders; there's really very little you can ONLY get from a son or a daughter- or so it seems to my childless self, anyway; I'm DEFINITELY not going to claim I understand parenthood. But there are charms that you're certainly going to find more of, or more frequently, in one than in the other. And if you don't see them, well, it'll be a surprise, no?

[ThrillSeeker01]

Ugh, I'm sorry. That must feel terrible. Maybe it would have been better not knowing. But at the same time there is something good about knowing the truth even if it hurts.

[ThrillSeeker01]

Thanks for the MHO.

[Anonymous]

Our feelings are only so much under our control. Feeling a little sad because what you imagined isn't what you are getting is common. I'm sure dad loves you and wouldn't trade you for any boy in the world now. Don't worry about it.

[Opinion Owner]

My mom was hoping for me to be a girl. It's very normal for a parent to hope for a child of the same sex.

[Cutegirl06]

Sounds like your dad loved you still.