Hi opinions please friends?

[Anonymous]

I think I have a little crush on a guy that's not related to me by blood he's my sister's stepson she has has 3 kids to his dad but he is not my sister's son he's not blood related to me or her is this wrong?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo that's kinda tricky. On one hand, you can't help who you develop feelings for. But he is family through your sister's marriage so there's some stuff to consider.

A few things - how much older is he than you? There needs to be a clear separation from any kind of parental role. Also you'd have to be super discreet since things could get weird if fam finds out.

Personally I'd say first make sure the crush isn't just surface level attraction and see if it develops into something deeper. Give it time before acting on anything in case it fades.

If the feelings persist long term though and he's not too much younger, maybe try subtly hinting at him to gauge interest back. But proceed with caution - going behind your sis's back could cause big family drama.

My advice would be see if you can get some separation from living together first so things don't get messy. And if a relationship does happen way down the line, be 100% transparent with sis from the start so she hears it from you.

Tread lightly, but don't deny your heart totally either if it's real. Just make fam comfort the top priority too, feel me? Good luck sorting it out!

[Asker]

Oh no my sister her 3 kids and stepson and there father live in diffrent house from me and I wouldn't go out with him I think he's nice looking though a sometimes can't stop looking at him when I go to my sister's reason I wouldn't go with him is because he's ma sisters stepson and mite cause them to think am no right or something and he's only 23 he's to young for me am 34 so I think it's just his looks am very attached to a crush cause of how gorgeous he looks but nothing more

[Oliverlogan263]

Ahhh gotcha, that makes more sense with the living situation being separate. And yeah he is pretty young at 23 compared to you. Sounds like just a little harmless crush then as long as it doesn't go past looking!

I totally get being attracted to someone's looks even if you know nothing could happen. As long as you're not acting on it or making him uncomfortable, I don't think a little crush is wrong per say. We can't help who we're drawn to sometimes.

Just be careful not to stare TOO much when you visit sis so he doesn't catch on, haha! And try to meet other guys your own age too so this one stays in the just-thinks-he's-cute zone. Nobody needs the family drama if they thought it was more. But no shame in a harmless admiration from afar. You do you girl!

[Asker]

No he's way to young for me and I am talking to someone else it's just a look crush that's all nothing more deep than that

[Oliverlogan263]

Ahh gotcha, no worries then. A little look crush is harmless as long as you keep it light. Good thing you're talkin to someone else your own age. And yeah, 23 is so young - dude's barely out of college probably! Probably not even looking to settle down yet. Definitely not worth risking any family drama over just a little attraction. You seem like you've got a good head on your shoulders about it. Keep doin your thing, spendin time with folks your age. Who knows, maybe over time the little crush will fade out on its own now that you're distancing a bit emotionally. But don't stress too much about it either - we all notice a good lookin person now and then. As long as you respect any boundaries and it doesn't go past just lookin, I wouldn't even worry about feelin bad about it. You're good!

[Twilightprincess01]

Its not wrong per se, but could definetly lead to some awkwardness. Imagine your sister also being your mother in law. Although the feelings you have aren't wrong, you probably should keep them to yourself to avoid a lot of awkward happenings.

[Asker]

A was kinda thinking the same thing a did tell him I thought he was gorgeous cause he said to me a don't know how it all works a just look at him as a pal no a relative a wouldn't go out with him a just have a crush he's gorgeous but I have kept it to myself av only said to him

[rosemilk]

i'd say skip out on that. it can become awkward

[Asker]

Thanks for the advice taa