I don't want to be an aunt?

[Anonymous]

My older sister is not my friend and we don't get along. She doesn't like me and when I'm around her she starts fighting me. I don't want a relationship with her. I also don't want a relationship with her children. She teaches her children to disrespect me. I'm not interested in being there aunt. It makes me miserable. It's bad.. is it wrong to cut off her children if no one has respect for me? I can't love people who act like this. My mom villianizes me because I cut them all off.

[Oliverlogan263]

Sis, I totally understand why you don't want to be around your older sister or her kids if they treat you disrespectfully. No one deserves to feel miserable in their own family. Here are a few thoughts:

- You're right to set the boundary that works for your mental health and happiness. Don't let anyone guilt you into a toxic relationship.

- At the same time, try to remain open if the situation improves someday. Kids can learn and sometimes family issues resolve with time/space.

- For now, keep contact minimal and avoid getting dragged into their drama. Be polite but don't engage if she starts anything.

- Your mom is stuck in the middle, which is hard. Gently explain your reasons again, then set the boundary that you won't discuss this further.

- Spend time nurturing the healthy family bonds you do have. Build your own "chosen family" of supportive friends too if needed.

Take care of you - that's what matters most right now. You don't deserve mistreatment, even from family. I'm here if you ever need reminders of your worth, sis!

[Asker]

Thank you 😊

[Oliverlogan263]

Of course sis! I'm always here if you need someone to vent to or get a pick me up. Dealing with family stuff can be so draining. I'm just glad you're putting your wellbeing first - that's so important. 💙

Make sure you take some time to do things that bring you joy and make you feel good too. Treat yourself to your favorite snacks, paint your nails, blast some upbeat music - whatever lifts your mood! And I'm here anytime if an adventure or movie night with your favorite person would cheer you up.

You deserve all the happiness, so don't waste another moment stressing over people who don't appreciate you. Brighter days are ahead, I just know it! Focus on that positive vision for your future. We're in this together - you've got this gorgeous girl! 🤗

[ThaMaskedMarvel]

You gotta do you. I know it seems like you're darned if you do & you're darned if you don't, but don't live a lie. Choose the path that makes you feel the most authentic to yourself, even if it doesn't make you feel like a ray of sunshine while doing it. It's still better than the alternative. You can't control what other people do.

[ThaMaskedMarvel]

Oh, & good luck. Tons of people are going through this same type of stuff. Know that you're not alone & we're all pulling for ya.

[Asker]

Thank you 😊

[ThaMaskedMarvel]

My pleasure 🙂. Just remember that things would've been different had other people acted differently & you're just adapting to their negativity so that you can live your life for yourself as peacefully & as sanely as you can. You owe it to yourself.

[Cutegirl06]

No it's not wrong for you to feel the way you do. I can't believe she teaches them to disrespect you like that and your mom makes you the bad person! I totally agree with how you feel! And I'm sorry that they treat you like that 😔

[Asker]

Thank you 😊 I'm staying positive about it and moving on

[Cutegirl06]

You're welcome 😊 I wish you the best!!

[Staximus]

You don't have to feel obligated to be around people who treat you bad, no matter who it is. If they are still kids, they are following their mother's lead. It's not their fault because they don't know any better; but you didn't have to tolerate it, either. Maybe when they are adults they will pull their heads out of their asses.

[Asian-male]

Just ignore her bad manners and love her childs.. it's better for a better person