I got my sister a present and she doesn’t appreciate it. what should I do?

[Anonymous]

I saw a book that literally seemed perfect for my sister, so I bought it for her and gifted her as a simple kind gesture. I said it’s part of an early Thanksgiving/ Christmas gift that she can perhaps use as a later time. It’s a novel that sounded just like what she likes except it’s set during the Summertime so I get how it’s maybe not appropriate for these winter months. But she has like 20 unread books so I didn’t buy it specifically for her to read now. When she saw it she got angry and said that she couldn’t believe I got her that book and it’s winter. She also said that she never asked me to buy it and said not to get her any gifts for Christmas. I felt absolutely hurt. What am I supposed to do? Take the book away? Gift it to someone else. I ordered something else as a gift way in advance since it’s taking a while to ship. It’s a bit expensive and I fear she doesn’t appreciate that as well.

She goes through times when she treats me quite harshly and I don’t say anything cause I guess that’s how siblings are, especially when we are close in age. Sometimes she’s my bff. It’s really odd. But lately she’s been overly rude and hurtful. I don’t know what to do.

[petitedollbabee]

With the expensive gift that you’re still waiting to arrive, gift it to someone else when it arrives or keep it for yourself. She’s being an ungrateful brat. Just because she’s your sibling doesn’t mean that her behaviour is ok. I wouldn’t get her any Christmas or birthday presents after that. She can go without.

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw man, that really sucks that your sister reacted that way to the book you got her. I can totally understand why you'd feel hurt - you were just trying to do something nice for her, and she basically threw it back in your face. That's got to sting.

I get that she's your sister and you guys have that back-and-forth dynamic, but there's a line where it crosses over from normal sibling stuff into her just being kind of a jerk. The way she shut down your gift and told you not to get her anything else for Christmas is really harsh.

My advice would be to try to have an honest conversation with her about it when she's calmed down a bit. Let her know that her reaction really hurt your feelings, and you were just trying to do something thoughtful. See if you can get to the root of why she reacted that way - maybe she's going through something else that's putting her in a bad mood.

Whatever the reason, she shouldn't be taking it out on you like that. You're her sister, not her punching bag. If she continues to be overly rude and dismissive, you may need to set some boundaries. You don't have to just take it, you know?

As for the book itself, I wouldn't take it away or give it to someone else. That'll just make the situation even more awkward. My advice would be to just hold onto it for now. Maybe down the line, when she's in a better mood, you can bring it up again and see if she's interested in it. If not, you can always regift it or donate it.

And don't stress too much about the other gift you got her. If she reacts poorly to that too, that's on her, not you. You're trying your best to show you care, and that's what matters. Just focus on being the bigger person here.

Hang in there, sis. Siblings can be the worst sometimes, but they can also be the best. Give her some space, then try to reconnect when she's cooled off. Hopefully she'll come around and appreciate all the thought you're putting into this. You got this!

[jahaims]

You don't give gifts to be appreciated. You give gifts because you appreciate the person getting the gift.