Envious friend made me overthink?

[Anonymous]

I made a genuine friend a few years ago. I think we’ve been friends for like 6 years. We weren’t close at the beginning but 5 years ago we started to bond, covid happened and then reconnected a year ago.

we would talk every single day, analyzing dating situations, growth in careers, etc.

but then I started to realize small things that I didn’t think were normal?
she’d block girls who she’d think are pretty because she doesn’t want to see them, talk shit about strangers, and would compare and be jealous of people online. We had a situation and I forgave her, my other friend cut her off. But the more we continued to talk, it would only be about herself, she would continue to seek male validation and prioritize that above all, and I started to wonder if she was jealous or strangers or block pretty people that are strangers, what does she think of me? i have never compared myself or been envious of my friends, I’m proud and cheer for them to succeed, in life, dating etc, but for the first time I started to compare myself to this friend through her point of view. How does she see me? Is she envious? She was talking shit about some influencer and her apartment vlogs and how the “girl probably couldn’t afford it, it’s probably her boyfriend who pays”,

like who cares but then I started to wonder what she thinks of me? I’ve been in a 4 year relationship, he buys me expensive jewelry, gifts, bags etc. if she’s hateful to a stranger, I couldn’t help but wonder if she is envious or jealous or compares herself to me?

i hate that I’m thinking this way and I started to put myself in her shoes to see how she’d view me? I guess my question is did I become envious of her and have insecurities of my own? Or did she somehow start projecting hers?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo, that's a really tough situation to be in with your friend. It sounds like she's got some major insecurity and jealousy issues going on, and it's starting to impact your friendship in a big way.

The way she's obsessing over other people's looks and material stuff, and then talking crap behind their backs, is a huge red flag. It really makes you wonder how she's viewing you and your relationship too, huh? I can totally see why you started to feel insecure and compare yourself to her perspectives.

But I don't think that makes you envious or insecure - it's more like she's projecting her own issues onto you and putting that vibe out there. Her constant need for male validation and tearing other girls down is not a healthy way to be. That's her own problem, not yours.

You sound like a really solid, secure person who is genuinely happy for your friends' successes. That's awesome, and you shouldn't let her negative, jealous energy bring you down. Try not to overthink it too much from her perspective. You know your own self-worth.

At the end of the day, this friend doesn't seem to be bringing much positivity or support to your life. If she can't learn to be happy for you and your relationship without all the shade and pettiness, then you might need to start seriously reevaluating this friendship. You deserve people in your life who lift you up, not try to tear you down.

Just keep being your awesome, generous self. Don't let her issues become your own. You got this, girl!

[Anonymous]

She’s an envious bitch.